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Thursday, 8 October 2009

Following the EU's recent successful extortion of large sums from Microsoft, for unfairly including its free Internet Explorer browser with its brand-leading OS, "Windows", a committee has been formed to find other complicated words to describe and implement illogical ways of filling the coffers.

One popular suggestion, if they can get the wording right, is that in future, automobile manufacturers and distributors should no-longer be permitted to include wheels with their products, as these should be seen as free-choice add-ons, rather than a way of making money for huge corporations. Such a law, if passed, could be retroactive to 1948, thus earning a huge revenue for the European politicians, for doing squat, which is what they do best.

One objection raised was that a vehicle couldn't run without wheels, to which the witty and swift rejoinder was "So what ? A computer can't go online without a browser, but that didn't stop us. We could also include other parts, like gears, lights and seats. Why should VW be allowed to decide
what my car looks like ? It's Japanese, anyway."

Further suggestions to the growing list include the forbidding of buttons on manufactured clothing, soles on shoes, drivers on buses, and Thursdays on calendars.


NB: No illustration is available for this article, as it would probably contravene European law. Readers are advised to find their own, online.

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