Written by Locket
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Topics: Heaven, Broadband

Wednesday, 23 September 2009

Heaven has become the last place on earth to have full access broadband internet connection. Heaven Communication Ltd., based in Vatican City, has completed the installation of the four trillion miles of fiber optic cable and will offer Heaven internet users speeds of up to 2048 Kbs.

Head of Heaven, God, had this to say. "We are delighted that the work has been finished and that our Angels will have full access to the internet. Our dead people are also pleased because they had been complaining that there wasn't much to do when dead but will now be able to watch streaming videos and create their own dead blogs etc."

Head of Angels, Gabriel, added "This is great news. Christians can now sign into Messiah, the new messaging service, and pray online directly to God, Mary, Jesus or indeed any of the Angels in real time with immediate feedback. We are hoping that twenty four hour hymn internet podcasts will also be available in the near future."

At the same time Google is launching a new social networking search site Heavensearch. Heavensearch will allow living people to find old family members and pals and communicate with the dead without the need to use any other medium.

Look for more developments on this story in the near future.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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