Written by Aspartame Boy
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Topics: Money, Shopping

Saturday, 19 September 2009

image for Government introduces cash for shoppers program
It is anticipated that people will need to build storage facilities for all their money that they will soon have.

Washington DC - Thrilled with the tremendous success of the economic recovery so far, President Odamnbu has announced a new government program to stimulate the economy. We interviewed the President yesterday and are now revealing some of the details of this program.

The President explained that taxes act as an economic activity retardant. Taxes slow down the velocity of money, discouraging transactions.

Not any more.

"From now on, all taxes will be negative. We are instituting a negative 50% tax on all sales in America. And, the income tax will now increase your income by 50%, rather than deduct from it. And, you won't have to prepare long tax returns anymore. This alone will free up tons of fat bureaucrats for actual jobs making more stuff for the American people to buy."

Then the President grinned as he walked out of the Ovoid Office, quipping as he left, "Last one to be a millionaire is a rotten egg!"

[Next week we cover the Chinese reaction..]

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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