Written by matwil
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Topics: Money, Energy

Friday, 18 September 2009

image for Energy bills unlikely to fall
'What does the word irony mean? Can you guys that invented the USA help me out here, I'm not American'

Britain's main six energy suppliers today said that there is little chance of their prices being cut this coming year.

The Lord Chief Justice said that there will be one law for Liverpool players, people with the name Blair, and MPs who steal taxpayers' money - and one law for the rest of the population.

US President Barack Obama will decide not to criticise the state of Israel, despite it carrying out genocidal attacks against the Palestinian people year after year using American weapons.

The sun will rise tomorrow at sunrise, stay around for the rest of the day, then go down again at sunset.

Arab countries will produce lots of oil, and America will destabilise those countries if they try and become independent.

The next President of the USA will change nothing in America or the world, but will make lots of impressive-sounding speeches about it and have large teeth.

Western politicians will all make busy sounds whilst sending men to die in colonial wars for oil and opium, television stations will call that fighting for freedom and democracy.

Wasps will be dangerous and best to be avoided, as will lions, tigers, poisonous snakes and Hillarys.

Americans will still be waiting to understand what the English words - from England - 'satire' and 'irony' mean.

1 and 1 will equal 2.

The MFI Sale will still be on.

Next candidate on 'Mastermind' will be Sybil Fawlty - subject 'Stating the bleeding obvious'.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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