Written by Ricardo Fromage
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Topics: Economy, Cars

Thursday, 14 May 2009

image for A meagre merger emerges!
The British car industry yesterday

Bosses at the world biggest car makers are considering a radical new scheme in a last ditch attempt to return to making poorly built cars that handle like overladen boats in a force 9 gale. They have watched in shock and awe as Gordon Brown and Alistair Darling suggested putting all the toxic assets from the financial crisis into one big bad bank, therefore leaving the remaining banks to make immoral amounts of profit at the taxpayers expense. Apparently they are now considering the same dramatic course for the worlds motor industry.

A spokesperson for one German uber car brand, Willie Pfister said yesterday 'Yes, it's true, we have decided that it's obvious that, like toxic debt, some cars are as popular as Michael Jackson at scout camp and therefore Saab, Volvo, GM, Chrysler, Dodge and Jaguar will be formed into one entity called Shoddy Limited and probably sold to the Chinese where apparently, they will buy anything'

The Labour Minister responsible for driving British Industry into the ground, Peter Mandylifeboats said yesterday outside his second home;'this is a great day for Britain as it shows the innovative thinking required to get us out of the recesssion which was not caused by the Labour Party in any way,shape or form'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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