LONDON, England - The Queen reports that secret meetings held between China, England and the United States can now be made public, since "everybody knows about it anyway", as she told me.
The toxic assets that caused the world economic crises are not the result of the well known scheme to inflate, then deflate, housing prices. The houses themselves are toxic. It is a case of toxic collateral causing toxic assets, not toxic secret world leaders causing them.
The Chinese wallboard is causing wiring to turn black, people to get sick, and houses to be worthless. These are the very same houses that were built during the bubble.
Once China was made aware of the consequential damages, far exceeding the one trillion dollars in their china piggy bank, they shut up.
Calculated consequential damages exceed 100 trillion dollars. In exchange for not suing, the group behind the scheme had agreed to silence the press, so long as China kept buying US bonds.
Also, the Queen reported that Japan is starting to worry about aspartame liability, despite assurances from the group. Aspartame is useful to world rulers since it rots the frontal lobes needed for long term planning, and revolting.