Written by Roy Turse

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Topics: The Sun, IBM

Thursday, 19 March 2009

image for IBM to buy Sun
said to be ready to buy

IBM are said to be in talks regarding a possible purchase of the Sun. The technology company sees the Sun as being essential for all life in the solar system, and therefore of great potential value.

Sources suggest that IBM would look to develop technology to control the Sun as an energy resource and lease the energy to Sun users throughout the world. They may also be legally able to charge for the gravitational effect of the star, but at present it is not known how this could be achieved at a practical level.

With the earth's fossil energy reserves being depleted, and the catastrophic environmental effect of their continued use, solar energy is likely to become a massive market in the next twenty years. Whoever controls the source of solar energy could well become the planet's most powerful force.

IBM's shares went up 3% on the news.

Retraction: In an earlier version of this article we inadvertently suggested that IBM were intending to purchase The Sun, the UK daily tabloid newspaper. We apologise for any inconvenience caused.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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