Alistair Darling has today installed leading children's TV entertainers The Chuckle Brothers ("to me, to you") as joint CEO's of Halifax/Bank of Scotland with immediate effect.
The pair, real names Antoine and Julius Fitzroy-Chuckle have absolutely no experience of running a bank, and are fairy clueless as to what the job involves. Therefore they will be no worse placed than the last Management team at the Bank.
In a separate development, Lloyds Bank has announced that it will be returning to old working methods and practices. "Depositor's money will henceforth be kept in small wooden boxes at the Lombard Street branch, and hoarded" said a spokesman. Lloyds shares rose 18%. Shares in quill-makers rose 43%.