As long time galleons of the economic high seas have taken on water and are on their way to the bottom of Davy Jones' locker, there is only one sailing vessel still cruising smoothly on the seven seas. The pirate industry of Africa and Asia is the only corporation to post profits this quarter.
After raping, pillaging and kidnapping vessels, vassels and former capitalist vandals, Piracy Worldwide INC has had its most profitable growth spurt in its long corporate history. Even the companies that are being boarded and broadsided by PWI are buying the growth stock.
Captain and CEO Achmed Hookah said:
"Ahrhhh! Whan I gives me anyual ayedress to thee stockholdas , thay all be yo ho ho in and bottle of Rummin! Pirates are the new dot.com! We sail the high seas of the hedge funds and pierce the real estate bubble with our swords! Ahrrrh!"