Written by Ben Macnair
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Topics: Museum, dust

Wednesday, 5 November 2008

image for Leicester Dust Museum shuts
Leicester Dust Museum, closing to the public

Fans of dust in Leicester were today left bereft when the city's world famous dust museum shut for the last time.

The museum, which is said to contain the most valuable dust in the world in its vast collection is shutting due to a down-turn in its number of recent visitors.

Caretaker Fred Metcalfe told us: 'There was a time when we had 2, maybe 3 people coming through here a day, and that was a lot of work for Mavis and myself, but we have not a single visitor for three months. Mavis and I just sit in the main office drinking tea and eating biscuits. There was a time when it was Jaffa Cakes, and then Ginger-nuts, but now we have rich tea biscuits, and Tesco's brand digestives, that is how bad things have gotten'.

The Musuem, which has been open for more than 50 years, is said to contain dust from Queen Victoria, Albert Einstein, The Titanic, and some rare dust from the lost city of Atlantis. A lack of tourism has forced this museum to shut.

Mr Metcalfe went onto say: 'I am told that officially they have stock-takers and a curator coming in on Wednesday to help take the dust away, but Mavis and I each got an email on Tuesday asking if our hoover still worked'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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