It would appear that things are not too rosy in Iceland at the moment, thanks to the deepening financial crisis.
Responsible for more marital strain than any other place on earth - husbands used to dread coming home to find the kids alone shouting "Mums gone to Iceland" at the top of their voices - it would now appear that Iceland is about to, er, melt.
The branch in Rotherham was first to feel the pinch when famous celebrity chef Lawrence Olivier stormed into the store and switched off all the freezers containing frozen fatty and unhealthy food and calling Rotherham residents "foody coffin dodgers" and "fatty lard-buckets".
The Altrincham branch was next to fail when the chef with the hole in his middle, Marco Polo White, declared "anything frozen is dog sh*t", causing a mass picket by middle-aged wealthy Cheshire dog-owning blondes, and complete confusion in the streets as motorists tried to pass by their badly parked 4x4's.
Nearly local MP for the area, David Blunkett was said to be in a blind rage about the entire episode and was even seen threatening to return to government as a secretary of state.