Written by queen mudder
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Friday, 19 September 2008

image for Dead cat bounce as Wall Street rallies on Bush sub-prime slop-bucket scam
This one survived falling off the Twin Towers

Off-the-Wall-St, NY - (Ass Mess): Wall Street has reacted with a classic dead cat bounce following news of the Bush Administration-created hedge fund equivalent of a sub-prime slop bucket to absorb US banks' dodgy punts.

US Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson is spearheading the brainwave to 'deal with illiquid assets on institutions' balance sheets'.

Last month the President famously blamed 'drunkenness in the marketplace' for the nation's financial woes.

But many investors fear that banks' balance sheets are so soiled and ingrained with years of money laundering filth that no amount of soft-soaping the situation can avert a major collapse.

"Why this sudden humanitarian rush to bail out Wall Street bloodsucking vermin?" City Editor of LA FagHagSlagMag Dave Skank said today.

"Maybe Paulson's on a cut, or somethin'?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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