Written by Robert W. Armijo
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Sunday, 14 September 2008

Silicon Valley, California - Steve Jobs unveiled the latest Apple iNnovation today: iLHC pocketsize personal particle accelerators for mad CERN physicists on the go, all in celebratory observance of the Big Bang experiment that has not yet ended existence as we know it.

"It's not hardware," said a spokesman for Apple. "It's a software upgrade that users of both iPhone and iPod Apple products can download for little more than a few dollars (up from less than a dollar per iTune download due to increased energy costs)."

Because of the popularity of both iPods and iPhones globally, Apple estimates that if its products are linked together all at once with their new iLHC software download that they could replicate the very same physics experiment conducted at CERN.

"Now everyone with either an iPod or iPhone will have at their finger tips the power to act like God," said Jobs. "Welcome to my world. How do you like it now, Bill Gates?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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