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Sunday, 6 July 2008

image for Lorena Bobbit Franchises New Business
Lorena Bobbit admits she has a thing for weiners

Lorena Bobbit has been out of the public spotlight for several years since her famous scuffle with her ex-husband ended with police searching a vacant lot for his severed penis. The former criminal (charge with a felony, as she could not be charged with a missedaweiner) is back in the news as she has begun selling a new franchised restaurant concept.

"Lorena Bobbit's Chop Shop" is available to financially capable restauranteurs willing to operate their own business. The menu features different cuts of sausage served in a variety of sizes and with a multitude of side dishes.

Says Lorena, "we serve everything from your little Vienna sausages (reminds me of John) to standard hot dogs to Polish sausages to what we call a Mississippi Black Snake (12 inches long). It isn't really snake, but does taste so hot and juicy when it slides down your throat."

Interested buyers should know that the kitchen comes with a full set up of knives, cleavers, meat saws, and cutting boards to make food preparation that much easier. "My favorite cutting instruments should remind everyone of an old 50's television show. I call them the Wally Cleaver and the Beaver Cleaver."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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