San Ramon, California - (Sweet Light Crude Mess): Chevron Oil's San Ramon HQ will be inundated at the Corp's 28 May annual stockholders meeting as hundreds of writers from TheSpoof.com throng to demand a one-for-one exchange of barrels of crude for their story points.
The annual meeting is traditionally a lively affair stewarded with heavies and ring-fenced with electronic cattle wire.
The corporations's staggering 2007 profits have sparked a deluge of claims from satire and comedy writers who say they have the monopoly on churning out crude barrels of fun.
How this will go down at the Bollinger Boulevard HQ - named after jeroboams of the ruinously expensive French champagne - is anybody's guess.
"Anybody thinkin' they've got us over a barrel has another thing comin," newly appointed Chevron director General Jones said with a gleam in his eye.
Meanwhile the energy giant's Blind Faith field is set to quadruple the corporation's output by the year end in 2008.
"Should make a damn fine debut for whoever is in charge of the White House by then," BigOilShagger editor Dave Gush said today.
"And we can see it as being any of those McCain, Obama or Clinton stooges, either."