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Monday, 21 April 2008

image for OPEC debates wholesale market in underage females to offset rocketing crude prices
SOme fundamentalist polygamies want to diversify and reinvest their crude profits into new 'crude' markets

Vienna, Austria - (Reuterus & Ass Mess): An emergency session of the OPEC ruling council has debated the wholesale marketing of underage females to offset the rocketing price of crude which is nudging $120 a-barrel today.

The move follows pressure from polygamous hellholes like oil-rich Sordid Arabia and Iran which have already made a packet from soaring prices and are keen to diversify into new trading opportunities.

OPEC says it has noted the pros and cons.

The council's findings say that a crude commercialization of fundamentalist polygamies' female minors "would almost certainly cause the price of oil to plummet overnight" causing havoc in non-fundamentalist/polygamist oil states like Ecuador and Venezuela.

On the other hand prospective member states like Bolivia and Brazil might be persuaded to invest in polygamy minors' futures as a precondition to favorable OPEC membership terms.

The news comes amid reports that a Human Frights Watch group has named jailed fundamentalist nutter Warren Jeffs as the nightmare role model most despised by women in Sordid Arabia.

The report, Always A Babe! Human Frights in Polygamous Havens, says some men will always go the distance to invent reasons to screw minors as well as screw over older women.

And oil reserves have little to do with it.

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