Written by Unconfirmed Source
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Topics: Iraq, troops

Sunday, 25 April 2004

image for World Flower Market in Crisis!
Flower Crisis!

Unconfirmed sources report that demand for flowers to be showered on American troops in Iraq is straining the world flower market. The problem began just as the war in Iraq was starting. Apparently Iraqi citizens groups placed orders for hundreds of tons of flowers to be flown in ahead of the troops, but it just wasn't enough.

Markus Von Haur of the World Flower exchange in Holland explained the crisis. "We first knew we were in for it when several massive orders for flowers arrived at the same time, just as the war in Iraq was starting. We didn't find out till later, but all the orders were placed by the Iraqi people through intermediaries The flowers were shipped into Iraq ahead of the fighting to prepare for the arrival of American troops. Dozens of teams fanned out across the country to preposition the flowers to greet the American liberators. It worked and the troops where showered with flowers. But then things went sour for us. The orders for flowers just kept coming and coming we can't meet the demand the market is in chaos."

One soldier in Iraq said "I have never seen anything like it. They was tossing flowers at us like crazy. And it hasn't let up. The flowers just keep coming. These guys have made the desert bloom."

The US Military has contributed to the problem by ordering flowers to be showered on military units that have TV crews with them during the war. It was thought that the shortage would ease as the war finished up, but that has not been the case. The situation is actually getting worse as the military and Iraqi citizens continue to buy fresh cut flowers from around the world to meet the demand. World flower prices continue to spiral out of control.

Even local florists in America have felt the pinch says Sally Ann Giddons of Flowerland in Naples Florida. "Our prices have gone through the roof, if we can get any flowers at all. It's tough on us not having anything to sell and all, but if it helps the war i'm for it."

According to authorities, free wheeling entrepreneurs are getting into the game to meet the demand. Flower theft and diversions of flower shipments are happening for the first time in history. People are doing anything to get flowers into Iraq.

Just yesterday prices in Holland doubled causing many buyers to just go home. The flower market is in complete chaos and with the situation in Iraq unresolved there is no end in site.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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