Chancellor Alistair Darling has announced debt consolidation arrangements to relieve the Treasury's exposure to the Northern Rock and avoid its imminent nationalisation.
Speaking to TheSpoof.com he said that he had the brainwave during a commercial break on Corry.
"Some genuine customers who were interviewed for the advert spoke very highly of a company called Ocean Consolidators, so I called their premium rate number. They have now put funds in place which will wipe out our multi-billion pound loans to the failing bank over a very reasonable 99 year period."
Darling would not be drawn on the annual interest rate being charged, which is thought to be around 45%.
He told us, "As the Labour Government is about to be kicked into touch, my long term view of the economy doesn't need to stretch much past the middle of next week".
A spokesman for Ocean Consolidators said that the deal was, "Dependant on finance from the Bank of England".