Written by Don Davis
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Topics: US Navy

Wednesday, 24 October 2007

image for U.S. to Outsource Navy to Carnival Cruise Line

Camp Pendleton, CA (CNN) - Admiral Isaac Washington announced today that in an effort to reduce costs and encourage enlistment the Navy will be outsourcing the Pacific Fleet to Carnival Cruise Lines. The Navy is also currently working on a deal to outsource the Atlantic Fleet to Royal Caribbean.

When the Admiral was asked about the surprise decision he replied "…lets face it, they have newer and more high-tech ships than we have. Besides, wouldn't it be more fun to watch the rockets red glare from the pool on the Lido deck"?

The Admiral points out that "…this is more of a merger than a 'giving away' of our fleet. Both sides will benefit". Included in the deal is a retrofit of all Navy ships by Carnival Cruise Lines. While the cruise ships will now be equipped with heavy weaponry the Navy ships will be gaining staterooms, casinos and pools. Carnival plans to offer "Adventure Cruises" aboard the retro-fitted Navy ships to the Persian Gulf and possibly the upcoming wars with Iran and North Korea.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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