Drowing Street - (Rotters): Tory Party grandee members of the UK Hellfire Club are poised for a mass run on the City this week amid credible leaks that law enforcement officers are about to arrest the UK Prime Mobster and his wife for hiring the 7 July terror thugs in a bid to frame their bankruptcy creditors.
Veteran House of Von Battenburg string pullers are being watched night and day according to Met sources whose official motto 'Make My Day Tosser' is to be emblazoned on the revamped New Scotland Yard HQ later this week.
On suicide watch this week are:
Lord (Chris) Patten, Hellfire grandee and Thatcher's personal architect of a massive HSBC £250 billion fraud that enriched Chinese heroin triad gangs in exchange for the peaceful (sic) handover of Hong Kong to mainland China in 1999.
Now Chancellor of Oxford University, Patten is the epitome of hubristic sloth and self promotion. His chances of a plea bargain-related pardon: zero.
Lord St John of Fawsley: Hellfire pervert par excellence and biological father of the doppelganger implant that has served the Tories in the role of 'Princess Anne' for the last 35 years. Even the most reserved cold war historians are unequivocal that he is a tosser sans pareil.
Lord Carrington: Another doppelganger implant and Thatcher's former Foreign Secretary whose role in several attempts at UK military coup d'etat during the Reagan/Bush1 years are the stuff of Interpol legend.
KGB classified archives show that his 1982 hiring of convicted child molestors to plant a nuclear device under the Houses of Parliament during the Falklands conflict was paid directly from Riggs Bank accounts controlled by the Bush family.
Other on the list are too numerous to mention but are all mostly related to the Drowning Street double act that has promoted itself as the Blairs.
"It could be just a matter of days, maybe even hours, before the gibbet arrives at Traitors' Gate", said a spokesman, grinning from ear to ear.
Lord Levy is under sedation.