The Spoof reporter, who had been thinking that this would be a routine interview with a staid Easter Head, was shocked to hear this news.
"People think we're the essence of decorum," the Easter Head said, "and most of the time we are." But he went on to explain that, after dark, Easter Head Island becomes a different place. The Heads found out years ago that the terrain is perfect for growing marijuana.
"Who says nothing good happens after midnight?" the Head asked, adding: "When the sun goes down, we put on our farmers' hats and do planting, watering, plowing, and picking. Then we go back to our posts for the next day, so we can hide our bounty." A great business opportunity! He went on to explain that they always keep a little of the weed for themselves, but most of it they sell (he refused to indicate who buys it), giving the proceeds to the villagers. What the reporter heard was the familiar story of recreational use that gradually increases to addiction.
As he said good-bye to the reporter, the Easter Head explained that he's been searching for a rehab program, but he's not optimistic that he'll find one. "They discriminate against Easter Heads," he reported sadly, "they think we're the image of detached perfection; they don't want to think of us as having a problem."
BREAKING NEWS: The Spoof reporter may have some leads as to the buyers of the pot grown on Easter Island. The day after he interviewed the pothead, he was wandering among the Easter Heads, and he happened to see Willie Nelson and his band pull up in a huge bus. And behind Willie's bus were two buses of "tourists" from California!