Written by Al N.
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Thursday, 11 May 2017

image for Trump Administration Releases Money Saving Tips For New Trump Health Plan
On many street corners, cheap painkillers can be purchased.

Washington, DC Surgeon General Dr. Niles Crane has released a list of things Americans can do to reduce their health care costs under the new Trump health plan.

1. Stop going to the doctor so much

Everybody should buy some bandages and other medical supplies from Trump Online Medical Supplies and use them personally to save a trip to the doctor.

2. Avoid other people.

Other people are the biggest spreaders of germs. Be more like Trump. Remember, he's a germophobe who doesn't like to watch ladies "make toilet" on hotel beds. It's good advice people!

3. Accept "The Wall"

Understand that because of the huge cost of the Mexico Wall, many expensive diseases, including stroke, heart disease, and cancer, will no longer be covered under your insurance. But you can rest happy in your beds that you live in a less open and more insular society, which kinda goes back to number 2.

4. Stop complaining!

Nobody wants to hear how you're in pain, you can't move your legs, you're dying, and all that. Just stay at home and watch reruns of Frasier, all day, every day, on Hallmark.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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