Written by StubbornGorilla
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Wednesday, 11 February 2015

image for Jurrasic Park Patrons Cite Law of Diminishing Returns
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Jurassic Park, the dinosaur animal preserve on Isla Nublar located west of Costa Rica has been receiving complaints by patrons who have made multiple trips to the park.

"It's pretty much the same experience every time," stated Robert Bakker, a frequent visitor to the park, "except that the magic and wonder seems to diminish with every visit."

Other park patrons had similar complaints.

"The first time was amazing," stated Doug Henderson. "The second time I try to block out of my memory, because I had such a bad experience. The park almost seemed like a soulless copy of itself. By the third time I visited Jurassic Park they had added a few more dinosaurs. I loved the Pterodactyls, but the Spionosaurus was just so goony looking. I know that it was bigger than a T-Rex, but all I could think of was when Daffy Duck was turned into a neanderthal every time I looked at it."

Although, admitting the park has had its problems, a spokesman from the Hammond family has stated "We have worked very hard to make the Jurassic World park experience one that is unmatched by any attraction around the world, and we think the park as it stands today achieves that experience."

Patrons that have seen previews of the park's current offerings have been skeptical.

"Once I heard that they made their own dinosaur, I was like, what?" said one anonymous member of the preview audience. "What are the chances they could come up with anything that is remotely cooler than real dinosaurs?"

Another preview member stated, "Once I saw the Motorcycle and raptor stunt show I pretty much tuned out. I mean, it was cool for about two seconds, but the novelty wore off pretty fast."

Asked if they had any concerns about the popularity of the park when it opens this summer a representative stated, "We are confident we have crafted a world class experience, and expect park attendees to have nothing but great feedback once they actually experience Jurassic World for themselves."

A skeptical public seems to need convincing.

"Why is Jurassic Park still on an island?" one person asked. "After the first time I was expecting them to move to the mainland. I mean, dinosaurs running around all over the world; isn't that what everyone has expected to see since the first Jurassic Park?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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