Written by b kenneth mcgee
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Topics: Ice Cream

Monday, 5 May 2014

In an early morning press conference today, a spokesman for Ben & Berry's Ice Cream announced two new flavors of ice cream
that will be on store shelves this coming month. The two new flavors are Defecake aka: Shit Pie and Booger Bonanza!

Ben & Berry's have always appealed to the young and the avant garde. In announcing the two new flavors the company is expecting a huge bounce in this years sales.

"Everyone knows," stated the spokesman, "that just simply calling out the word "Booger" is a cause for immediate laughter among the worlds young folks. "Boooger" shouted out in a quit study hall, on a crowded playground or in the middle of the Pledge of Allegiance at the beginning of the school day brings laughter that stops all other reflection."

The spokesman continued: "Defercake aka: Shit Pie, speaks for itself. Although Shit Pie has a downside in its connotation, every young person and inded every older person knows they will have to eat a certain amount of Shit Pie in their lives. Ben & Berry's is saying, have a double dip here and now," he paused, "and smile all the while!"

In related news, The Wall Street Journal is reporting Ben & Berry's stock had risen sharply prior to todays opening of the New York Stock Exchange. CNN has reported that the VP of the exchange had shouted out "Booger" at the opening bell!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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