Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 16 December 2013

image for A Kansas Farmer Has Developed A Pear That Tastes Like Ribeye Steak
Three of Gibraltar Goldenball's newly developed Ribby Pears.

WICHITA, Kansas - The news media is reporting that local farmer Gibraltar Goldenball, 58, has come up with a pear that will revolutionize the pear industry.

Durango Tucker with National Focus Magazine interviewed Mr. Goldenball on his 2,713 acre pear farm located just outside of Wichita.

Goldenball was asked about his amazing pears which taste exactly like ribeye steak.

He replied that he calls them Ribby Pears. He told Tucker that he had been experimenting for the past 12 years on trying to find a way to make a pear taste like a ribeye steak.

Goldenball said that last January he was able to get his pears to taste like salami. He commented that he knew that he was on the right track.

The happy pear farmer pointed out that three weeks ago after all kinds of experimenting he was finally able to get his pears to taste exactly like ribeye steak.

He said that he blindfolded his wife Tansie, 53, and his mother-in-law Gertie Lili Puckerprice, 72, and each one tasted a piece of pear and a piece of ribeye steak and neither Tansie nor her mama could tell the difference.

Tucker asked him if he had been approached by anyone from the government about his pear invention.

He smiled and said that he had and that they had offered him $3.4 million for the rights to his ribeye steak tasting pears.

SIDENOTE: Gibraltar Goldenball says that he is going to ask for $3.5 million and if the government agrees he will sign over the rights to his Ribby Pears.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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