Written by Aspartame Boy
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Topics: Apple iPhone

Thursday, 6 June 2013

image for Apple annouces the iPhart portable lunch
The iPhart comes in an atractive red plastic bowl

California - Fresh from the fertile minds of Apple engineers, according to Apple spokesman Dick Mac Intush, the new portable iPhart lunches will be dispensed everywhere from new Apple vending machines.

The new product offering includes:

An apple (duh)

One pound of beans
One whole head of garlic
One whole onion
4 ounces of cabbage
Aspartame

The ingredients are designed for simple micro-waving.

The new product has caused some controversy. Boiler rooms banned the product, due to the high number of employes per square foot in open office configurations. See the story on the tragic gas explosion leveling the Chandler call center in yesterday's edition.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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