Tokyo - Minister of Finance, Kurtaklinger San, has announced a new bank will be in control of all Japanese banks. This new bank will also be taking over the other nations banks in quick succession. According to Kurtaklinger San spokesperson, Ningaworry San, The Bank of Rupt (TBOR), is set up with a simple advantage over other banks. While all other banks are measured on the basis of increasing positive balance sheet, TBOR is set up to maximize negative balance sheets.
This means that when other banks start to have trouble, TBOR can acquire them and prosper. Unlike most banks, TBOR does not allow people to deposit or repay money. They can only take money from TBOR. TBOR is also authorized to print as much money as there is demand for.
Economists see the rise of TBOR as a boon to mankind. As Dr. Sawlgood of Harvard University told reporters, "So many shortages exist today. It's good to know that thanks to TBOR, there will be no shortages of money."