Written by Ducksley
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Topics: America, Birds

Wednesday, 6 February 2013

The bald eagle has been the national bird of the US since 1782, but it will soon lose that official designation to the Costco rotisserie chicken.

The National Board of Official Designated Stuff (NBODS) announced their decision to replace the eagle at a press conference today.

"The bald eagle has served America well for well over two hundred years, but you can't buy them at any price, let alone just $4.99, and you can't eat them," said NBODS spokesman Regis Boing.

Costco Ornithologist Mary Ellen Quartnikoff-Molar responded to the decision by saying, "Costco is honored by this designation and we're proud to send millions of these beautiful birds home with our customers each and every day."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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