Written by Lyndon
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Wednesday, 23 May 2012

image for All not well with Zuckerbergs: Priscilla angered by Facebook stock
Nothing like the bottom falling out of the market to stir shit up

Only days into the Zuckerbergs' new life together, Priscilla Chan is enraged with her husband, the NASDAQ, and anyone else who gets in her way.

How many shares of Facebook she actually owns is a mystery, but one thing is clear: The stock issued at $45 per share has plunged to $31, a loss of 31.11%.

Obviously, if Chan only owned three shares, she'd be out $42. Experts estimate, however, that that the newlywed owns in the neighborhood of one hundred thousand shares which would translate to a loss of $1.4 billion.

Harfold Equity Trust manager, Thomas Baten, thinks more trouble is on the rise. "If FB drops below $30, I think we could see real fireworks, but not the kind you like to see in a new marriage.

"Regardless, Chan stands to make a mint when she divorces him in a year."

Make Lyndon's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

Stop - Warning

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature.

This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

To confirm you have acknowledged this warning, and wish to continue to read the article, please click the following link.



Otherwise, please click here to go back to the home page.




Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 plus 5?

4 9 25 17

Go to top