Written by Aspartame Boy
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Thursday, 17 May 2012

image for Austerity backlash nixes central banks' stock splurging
Time to get out of stocks

MUNICH - Ben Bernanke announced at a press conference here today that he was sorry. No more money could be funneled through the central banks of Europe to keep the stock markets afloat. He blamed it on democracy, as exemplified in Greece.

"Now that Germany's Merkel has caved into the Greeks, all those PIIGS are going to start demanding more loans and rejecting austerity. This means we will no longer be able to pump money into equities, as we have been doing with our undersea dollar pipe line to Europe", he was heard to say at the press conference this morning.

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