The Greek economy has been saved due to the global record consumption of their most famous product, ouzo, over the Christmas period. The German and French governments + other European states are relieved that the Euro crisis has now been resolved and have thanked the Greek government in the stupendous efforts by getting totally pissed on the stuff. Only the stiff non-Euro Brits decided to refrain from congratulating the Greeks because they got pissed on non-Euro Scotch.
This economic miracle has been achieved by a massive Greek marketing campaign projecting to the world the benefits of boozing their wonderful product, here are some of the main benefits:
A: You never get a hangover even after downing a whole bottle in one evening.
B: The medicinal advantages of boozing litres of ouzo are beyond doubt i.E. It kills all known bacteria circulating after over-eating dead turkeys and stodgy christmas puddings.
C: Keeps you warm day and night and reduces heating bills.
D: Reduces bad breath and germs on the tongue after one has sucked strange pussies or dicks at office christmas parties. Etc, etc.
The Spanish and Italian governments are now following the Greek example by marketing their most famous beverages, Grappa and Bacardi and it seems that massive alcohol comsumption is not so evil after all and we can all look forward to "A prosperous new Year", BUUUUUUURP!