Dr Giles Fraser, Canon Chancellor of St Paul's Exchequer, has fired off an appeal to protesters outside St Paul's to move on and save St Paul's from 'the spread of morality' which he finds annoying.
'The life of the Cathedral is being upset by health and safety restrictions which are imposed on us' he declared. 'No one knows what the problems are but there must be something amiss.'
However the Chancellor, remembering the advice from someone or other that the money lenders should be driven from the Temple rather than those people who complained about them, realised that his plea should be to the Banks.
He recalled that reports from the Police, who had spent invaluable time trying to determine the number of people who stayed outside St Paul's throughout the night, that it must be uncomfortable outside.
He therefore felt that everybody would be happier if they were tucked up warmly in their own beds.
'We all want a better world' he said 'but must turn the other cheek until then.'