WASHINGTON D.C. - The international financial institution sought for the first time in its history to bail out a private company whose revenue is arguably the size of ten small nations. Normally, it only lends to rich countries whom can afford to not pay their debt.
But a spokesperson for the World Bank defended their bailout and said that its main goal was to 'reduce poverty' by way of 'foreign investment, international trade, and free phones to World Bank employees.'
United States Congress sought to block the loan approval by using diplomacy but Republican majority leader, Herman Cain said that 'he would personally see to it that Canada is treated by America the way America treats Mexico.'
As soon as Canada's Prime Minister Stephen Harper heard this, he hurried through tall columns of papers to find a blank sheet where he would write, "Canada now welcomes all Americans into their socialized healthcare system." Herman Cain responded by sending Stephen Harper free pizza.
If the bailout gets approved, Blackberry investors hope to give away money equivalent to the amount of one Apple iPhone4S to people in Apple stores.