The Eurozone crisis, caused mainly by Greece defaulting on its debts, has forced the Greeks into desperate measures and leading the way are their winemakers.
Athens announced that all Greek wines will be flogged off at 50p a bottle, in spite of vintage, quality, or age: it all must go.
On hearing this, Scotland was emptied within 24 hours with 85% of the Scottish population booking their Ryanair tickets to Athens and heading straight for the wine bars off-licences supermarkets pubs etc., in search of the "red nectar".
The Scottish are well known for their love of booze and tight-fistedness and a short holiday in Greece seems perfect emptying two bottles with one stone (as it were).
The Finns who are even more renowned piss-artists than the Scots,have also joined the exodus towards Greece. Their prime minister has promised the Greeks that they will drink the place empty like a plague of locusts within one week.
As for the Greeks, they will benefit doubly as hoteliers and restaurant owners will be keeping the ensuing holidaymakers housed and fed, while all the time promising to keep the wine flowing as long as necessary to stop the Greek economy from sinking.
This idea was the brainchild of a European alcoholic genius.Not Angela Merkel and her gang, who have been sticking their heads in the sand attempting to come up with a plan to save the Greeks. Instead, this wondrous plan was devised by Mr Papadopoulos of Walford, London, who owns a chain of coin-operated launderettes and off-licenses.
"Booze is the answer to all of the problems, just plain old cheap booze!" He exclaimed. "Since all this started, I've been selling more booze thank you could imagine. I've even been buying it cheap from countries like Greece, since they started going down the pan. I sell it here for 6000% profit. I wish they came round more often, these recessions. Yiamas!"