There were 94 spoof news stories published in October 2015. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.

Funny story: Six-Year-Old Drug Mule To Be Executed Despite Plea To Thai King

Six-Year-Old Drug Mule To Be Executed Despite Plea To Thai King

A seven-year-old drug mule is due to be executed later this evening three months after an Irish drug smuggling cartel was caught smuggling cocaine out of Thailand. The Galway based gang was busted earlier this year in Bangkok after custom's offici...
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Funny story: Twitter Birdies May Lose Jobs, Hope for Remake of Movie THE BIRDS

Twitter Birdies May Lose Jobs, Hope for Remake of Movie THE BIRDS

Ever since Twitter announced plans to cut its workforce, the birdies have been all atwitter, wondering if some of them will be losing their jobs. "Hopefully not," said Bill Twitter, Head Bird of the Twitter Birdies labor union. "After all, it is...
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Funny story: Candid Photos of a Naked Daniel Craig Pumping Iron Leaked On Line

Candid Photos of a Naked Daniel Craig Pumping Iron Leaked On Line

James Bond star Daniel Craig is said to furious after naked photographs of him pumping Iron were leaked onto the internet. The photos, apparently taken with a high powered lens, show the actor sweating while totally nude at his home in Los Angeles.
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Funny story: Four Girls Injured After Mob Attack At Local Mall

Four Girls Injured After Mob Attack At Local Mall

We have also this week, to publish, with feelings of regret and sympathy, the portraits of four young women who were among the victims of mob fury at a Fort Lauderdale Shopping Mall on a fatal Sunday afternoon. All from the Fort Lauderdale area,...
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Funny story: Potential Empress denies she was out of touch as Tatooine spiraled out of control

Potential Empress denies she was out of touch as Tatooine spiraled out of control

Imperial candidate Higgid Conte defended herself Thursday against accusations she was out of touch as the situation in Tatooine spiraled out of control before the 78901 rebel attack, at a long-awaited Imperial hearing where leading members of the Emp...
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Funny story: Who Threw the Overalls in Mr. Murphy's Chowder?

Who Threw the Overalls in Mr. Murphy's Chowder?

NY Mets player Daniel Murphy has astonished the sports world -- and himself -- with a history-making performance. Home runs in six consecutive post-season games! There's a secret to his success. Keep it under your hat, but SOMEONE has been throwin...
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Funny story: Taylor Swift & Latest Lover Split Up

Taylor Swift & Latest Lover Split Up

Taylor swift has sensationally broken up with herself telling friends and family "That's it, we are done, it is over, we are never, EVER, getting back together!" The break up has come as a surprise for many but for others it seems it is a regular...
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Funny story: New Volkswagen model not only cheats, but gets away with it

New Volkswagen model not only cheats, but gets away with it

Wolfsburg, Germany - Roundly criticized for selling cars that cheat on environmental emissions tests, Volkswagen AG is fighting to win its reputation back. The company has introduced a new model that can lie, cheat and scheme without getting ca...
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Funny story: Thrifty shoppers causing supermarket chaos

Thrifty shoppers causing supermarket chaos

Thrifty shoppers spurred by the growing economic downturn are finding new ways to save mega bucks at the grocery store checkout; however, some stores claim that the "penny wise" consumers may see an increase in prices should supermarkets be forced to...
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Funny story: Good God No! Disney Has Turned The New Star Wars Into A Musical!

Good God No! Disney Has Turned The New Star Wars Into A Musical!

Unbeknownst to the press and we Star Wars geeks, Disney has insisted that Director J.J. Abrams make the upcoming seventh installment of the Star Wars mega-franchise a musical, hoping to continue Disney's legacy of hit making song and dance movies suc...
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Funny story: Oscars To Be Re-named the Patties

Oscars To Be Re-named the Patties

In a controversial move announced today the Oscars are to be re-named the Patties. A spokesman from the Oscars committee made the following announcement. "We were told that a statue of a bare-chested bald man holding a sword between his legs was...
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Funny story: Donald Trump's Alter Ego Announces his Candidacy

Donald Trump's Alter Ego Announces his Candidacy

NEW YORK--Ronald Chump, the alter ego of media-hog Donald Trump, today announced his candidacy for president, saying that he was running for president because all of the other candidates were "low energy" and "losers" and incapable of "making Americ...
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Funny story: Arrieta Delivers Baby; Cubs Win

Arrieta Delivers Baby; Cubs Win

The Chicago Cubs are on the verge of securing a NLDS series win over the St. Louis Cardinals. With the series victory they will only have one team in their way for the opportunity to compete in the World Series, for the first time since 1945. The...
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Funny story: Details of Tristan Thompson's Contract Emerge

Details of Tristan Thompson's Contract Emerge

Since the first day of elegible free agent signing in the NBA, all eyes have been on the Cleveland Cavaliers and their budding star power forward Tristan Thompson. A max offer sheet seemed imminent, however as the days turned to months, Thompson stil...
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Funny story: Man wins woman of the year award

Man wins woman of the year award

A 38 year old man from Belfast, Northern Ireland has won this year's woman of the year award. Patrick McMahon, who works as a long distance truck driver delivering stationery, is said to be delighted at being this year's recipient. Speaking...
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Funny story: Magazine Associated with Norman Rockwell Paintings to Publish Nude Centerfolds

Magazine Associated with Norman Rockwell Paintings to Publish Nude Centerfolds

Indianapolis-"I only read it for the Norman Rockwell tributes." That is what editors of The Saturday Evening Post are hoping to hear from horny readers-old and young-when it starts publishing nude centerfolds of deceased and aging celebrities nex...
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Funny story: Proof: Donald Trump is a Malfunctioning Cyborg

Proof: Donald Trump is a Malfunctioning Cyborg

Donald Trump is not human. Proof has emerged that the creature known as The Donald actually is a failed experiment by North Korean scientists to develop an army of cyborgs. It all was part of a top secret North Korean plot to infiltra...
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Funny story: Clinton Declared Winner of 2nd Democratic debate One Month Early: CNNs new model reveals

Clinton Declared Winner of 2nd Democratic debate One Month Early: CNNs new model reveals

The field of Democratic presidential hopefuls will face off in their second debate hosted by CBS in one month's time, but thanks to CNN's new predictive model using Bayesian statistics, Markov Chain and a new technique referred to as 'Hyperbole Subte...
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Funny story: Obama's "don't do stupid stuff" policy upgraded for honorable exceptions

Obama's "don't do stupid stuff" policy upgraded for honorable exceptions

Mr. Obama's hallmark "don't-do-stupid-stuff" policy from a few years back is currently being upgraded to "unless-it-involves-Syria." Yesterday the US dropped 50 tons of ammunition near Raqqa to a Syria-Arab brigade fighting ISIS/IS, the leader of...
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Funny story: Putin Invites Gays to Russia for Sex

Putin Invites Gays to Russia for Sex

The Supreme Leader of Father Russia, Vladimir Putin has taken to the airwaves to declare that his country is a secret sexual haven for gays. On an LGBT radio show, the Fatherland's leader criticised the rest of the world's treatments of homosexual...
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Funny story: James Madison Addresses the Nation

James Madison Addresses the Nation

HEAVEN--James Madison, from his final resting place in heaven, today addressed the nation about the barrage of school shootings afflicting the United States. The text of Madison's speech follows: My fellow Americans, Many of you know me as one of the Founding Fathers and the fourth President of this great nation. Fewer of you are no doubt familiar with the many contributions I made to the...
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Funny story: IRS Says High Income Women Marrying Jesus as Tax Dodge

IRS Says High Income Women Marrying Jesus as Tax Dodge

Officials at the IRS suspect many of the recent marriages involving Jesus Christ and high income women may not be kosher. IRS director Gus Whitney said today, "We received thousands of tax returns last year from women who are newly married to Jesu...
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Funny story: 6-year-old entrepreneur jailed for deaths stemming from "Puppy Chocolate Factory" business

6-year-old entrepreneur jailed for deaths stemming from "Puppy Chocolate Factory" business

BRUNSWICK, GA - When 6-year-old Jamie Applesmith opened her business "Puppy Chocolate Factory," the reaction was astonishing. More than a dozen of her closest family members and neighbors came knocking at her door to support her business, many of who...
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Funny story: Extremist Pinko Professor Vilifies Humanitarian Heroes

Extremist Pinko Professor Vilifies Humanitarian Heroes

Some recent comments about humanitarian heroism have failed to satisfy the ever-impossible-to-please satire news fixture, Pre-Senior-Professor-Guru-Emeritus Angus Lenn(on/in)vedanta Smiggles from the Social Constructionist String Theory Department in Bushmills Metaphysical College. Notable public figure and moderate political Tory-ist William Hague moans: It is just so very, very unfair, how...
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Funny story: European Union clamps down on lemon pips

European Union clamps down on lemon pips

The European Union is preparing to crack down on the volume of pips found in lemons. Horst Limeburger, leader of the new Citrus Division in Brussels, confirmed: "We have been receiving complaints from restaurants and hobby cooks. One caterer count...
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Funny story: DNA Test Confirms: Justin Trudeau Actually Mick Jagger's Son

DNA Test Confirms: Justin Trudeau Actually Mick Jagger's Son

On Thursday morning of this past week, Dr. Maxwell Zilberhammer of the Great White North Health Sciences Laboratory announced the results of a DNA test ordered and paid for by the campaign of recently defeated Canadian Prime Minister Harpo Stevens.
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Funny story: The Special One is a victim of tabloid scumbags!

The Special One is a victim of tabloid scumbags!

A once very "Special One" loved by Chelsea Dandy's, Fairies and other Mad Hatters, has become yet another bloody victim of British tabloids a most desirable pack of blood-thirsty bloodhounds, unique in the world and second to none! The Daily S++r,...
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Funny story: Worst Mass Shooting in U.S. History

Worst Mass Shooting in U.S. History

Yesterday morning, everyone in the lower forty-eight states was killed or critically wounded in the worst mass shooting in U.S. history. Investigators from Canada's RCMP and Mexico's Policia Federales issued the following joint statement (as they...
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Funny story: Liverpool sack manager and replace him with a dead Beetle!

Liverpool sack manager and replace him with a dead Beetle!

In pure desperation and a determination to win back former glory, Liverpool have sacked their manager and replaced him with a dead Beetle! It was a difficult decision sacking their present manager, but after a long debate, 5 minutes, the Liverpool...
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Funny story: Jihadis Attempt to Blow Up Great Pyramid, Extra-Terrestrials Return Fire!

Jihadis Attempt to Blow Up Great Pyramid, Extra-Terrestrials Return Fire!

On Tuesday morning, a ragtag band of Muslim fundamentalists attempted to tunnel under the Great Pyramid of Giza with the intent of planting and detonating a crude thermonuclear device underneath it. They were instantly annihilated by an intense brea...
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Funny story: "Obama must go" demand grows out of the Syria conflict

"Obama must go" demand grows out of the Syria conflict

Sources have now drilled down into origins of this new development as not coming from Vladimir Putin, who states, "Partners should see it through." It comes from a specialized group in touch with both the Assad and ISIS regimes. The nature of thi...
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Funny story: NC State Fair: Deep fried dog turds dipped in choclate & wrapped in bacon!

NC State Fair: Deep fried dog turds dipped in choclate & wrapped in bacon!

The Raleigh News & Observer is reporting today that the biggest attraction on the Food Court on opening day of the fair was: Deep fried dog turds dipped in chocolate and wrapped in bacon! The line stretched around the block as attendees waited to...
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Funny story: Putin Puts In His Pugnacious Presence to Punitively Preempt and Perhaps Plunder the Syrian Proceedings Plight

Putin Puts In His Pugnacious Presence to Punitively Preempt and Perhaps Plunder the Syrian Proceedings Plight

Obama and other world leaders were sitting around the UN private lounge contemplating what to do about the Syrian crisis that was disturbing all of the Mideast and Europe. Depression had set in due to the difficulties that had arisen over the situation that seemed to escalate no matter what their efforts were. And it all was basically because of one man- Bashar al-Assad, the dictator of Syria.
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Funny story: Mystery planet with huge structure found by boffins

Mystery planet with huge structure found by boffins

An announcement from NASA that the discovery of a possible structure surrounding a planet could be made by Aliens was met with a mixed reaction today. Scientists studying the planet say they have found what appears to be a structure surrounding th...
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Funny story: Child raised on sexually explicit movies grows up to be sex god

Child raised on sexually explicit movies grows up to be sex god

Local teenager Jake Smith is heralded to be outstanding at sex after spending the last ten years of his childhood watching films with strong sexual content. After years of subverting parental controls and sneaking into R-rated films to watch two...
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Funny story: Snowden Reveals Secret to Understanding Alien Communications To Earth

Snowden Reveals Secret to Understanding Alien Communications To Earth

US government whistle-blower Edward Snowden believes they're aliens species in the universe. Snowden said, "They're trying to communicate with us. But we just don't understand them. " Snowden has an answer for researchers, scientists and amateur...
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Funny story: Republicans Greet Pope Francis

Republicans Greet Pope Francis

[The New York Times, Sept. 23, 2015] WASHINGTON - Welcomed with a fanfare of trumpets and a chorus of amens, Pope Francis introduced himself to the United States on Wednesday with a bracing message on climate change, immigration and poverty that ranged from the pastoral to the political. "I and my family are practicing Catholics, and I have the greatest respect for Francis, but the Pope isn't...
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Funny story: Dutch remain flat!

Dutch remain flat!

It seems "there are too many mountains high enough" for the Dutch as they attempted to climb Everest and fell off with impunity. Remaining as flat as their national dish, pancakes smothered with syrup, very sticky! Blind led the blind into a cul d...
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Funny story: Channel Tunnel brought to a standstill by Brits hoping to escape the Island!

Channel Tunnel brought to a standstill by Brits hoping to escape the Island!

Jaggedone's CIA (cockroach Infiltration Army) special demographic upheaval reporter, Sir Bob Subterranean-Blues-Witherspoon, spent a filthy night under the English Channel observing an Exodus (Bob Marley intro please) of True Brits flooding the Chann...
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Funny story: National Not Going Out Campaign Announcement Ruined By Interloper From The Free Press

National Not Going Out Campaign Announcement Ruined By Interloper From The Free Press

Extraordinary scenes erupted at a press conference today when Dr Joseph H Mengelay informed the press that the BMA (British Medical Association) will be announcing a new campaign to stop people from going out in the evenings. Despite facing tough...
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Funny story: Amid Rising Poll Numbers, Ben Carson Announces the World Is Flat

Amid Rising Poll Numbers, Ben Carson Announces the World Is Flat

DOG'S TICK, AL--At a campaign event in Alabama on Tuesday, Ben Carson announced to an enthusiastic crowd, many of whom were near the top half of their graduating class in high school, that the world is not, as has been maintained since the fifteent...
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Funny story: Faded NJ Republican Star Looks to Shine a Little Brighter

Faded NJ Republican Star Looks to Shine a Little Brighter

Chris Christie A Faded New Jersey Republican Star attempts to shine brighter by switching his focus. He is now campaigning for The 2016 Democratic Presidential Nomination. Christie's staff released a statement earlier today " With Hilary being th...
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Funny story: 10 Worst Things About Being Irish

10 Worst Things About Being Irish

(1) Claiming that you are "irish". Nobody wakes up in the morning thinking they are Irish. An 'Irish' beard has never been shaved by an 'Irish' razor. (2). Seeking recognition for doing something exceptional. Taboo is that. That is why the Irish are hopeless at anything competitive. "Who da fuck duz he tink he is?" is an effective deterrent against the very thought of trying to win at ANYTHING.
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Funny story: MSM outfits name Trump and Sanders winners and call for speeding up 2016 election

MSM outfits name Trump and Sanders winners and call for speeding up 2016 election

A coalition of mainstream news (MSM) corporations has stepped forward to announce that the 2016 candidates for the presidency are already clear, and it's time to move on. The candidates are Donald Trump and Bernie Sanders, and the election can pro...
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Funny story: Move over Trump! This 100-foot robot with an American flagpole cock is the new Republican darling!

Move over Trump! This 100-foot robot with an American flagpole cock is the new Republican darling!

WASHINGTON, DC - Standing at a modest 18-full-grown-men tall, the sentient wrecking ball that is Koktor is setting fire to recent Republican polls. Having arrived on the political stage just days after defending the Pacific coast from a radioactive o...
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Funny story: Corbyn's Plans To Turn Downing Street into Refugee Camp

Corbyn's Plans To Turn Downing Street into Refugee Camp

Jeremy Corbyn has today vowed that he would turn Downing Street into a refugee centre. Speaking from one of the spare bedrooms in his North London detached house, Corbyn said this: "We need to show compassion. We need to show the world we are pre...
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Funny story: Assange responds to withdrawal of police from outside the embassy

Assange responds to withdrawal of police from outside the embassy

According to a recent interview with Spoof News, Julian Assange has stated his relief at being able to look out the window and see no sign of police around the embassy. He stated that the shock of this development is only gradually wearing off. Fo...
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Funny story: German Blitzkrieg over Liverpool!

German Blitzkrieg over Liverpool!

Liverpool has been the target of a German Blitzkrieg and surrendered after being bombarded by a series of bombshells that were released by the enemies of logic, the British tabloids! It even cost them 21 million GBPpounds! The 21 million was not...
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Funny story: Short Guy Opts for Taller Urinal at Rest Area

Short Guy Opts for Taller Urinal at Rest Area

Ludlow, MA - Short Guy Terry Dapp opted for a taller urinal upon entering the Ludlow Service Plaza Men's Room last Saturday. Vertically challenged at five feet four inches, Dapp would have been a superb match for the lower urinal that well serve...
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Funny story: Playboy to Feature Cats and Women

Playboy to Feature Cats and Women

Playboy magazine is to include pictures of naked women and cats, as part of its redesign. Its owners have blamed the internet for making mainstream pornographic material freely and readily available to all. Playboy's target audience has drasti...
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Funny story: WakiLeaks Gets An Inside Look At Assad's Meeting With Putin

WakiLeaks Gets An Inside Look At Assad's Meeting With Putin

The famed web expose site WakiLeaks scored a mammoth coup this week with its hidden camera surveillance of the Assad/Putin meeting in Moscow. The leader of Syria and the President of Russia were presumably meeting to discuss their mutual concerns abo...
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Funny story: John Kerry 'Accidentally' Nukes The Onion, Sky Doesn't Fall In (2/2)

John Kerry 'Accidentally' Nukes The Onion, Sky Doesn't Fall In (2/2)

How have people received John Kerry's recent nuclear annhilation of The Onion? We'll start off with Hillary Clinton. Now listen here, young man. With all due respect, reporter… which ain't very much, let's be… Ah, HONEST… Erm… Well anyway, why so fastidious? Huh? I mean, you know, maybe Iran are, say, just a few decades ahead of schedule in developing nukes and this is the first...
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Funny story: Men Banned From Public Transport

Men Banned From Public Transport

In a controversial move announced today, all transport companies across the USA will be taking steps to ban men from using public transport at peak times. This follows a successful campaign by Free the Space, an activist group founded by Chloe Ben...
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Funny story: Oktoberfest in Canada

Oktoberfest in Canada

Those motorists who've ever decided to save a few miles and dodge a few highway tolls on the drive between Buffalo NY and Chicago by passing through that large game sanctuary known as "Canada" may have wondered: "What is there to do here besides hunt moose, photograph Mounties, and guzzle buckets of Tim Horny's coffee?" Well, anyone who braves this passage in early October --just before the ent...
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Funny story: Police Launch Operation Witch-Hunt

Police Launch Operation Witch-Hunt

Police today have announced the launch of Operation Witch-Hunt . In a statement issued today, Chief Superintendent Hopkins, who will head the operation, has said that although witchcraft is not illegal in the UK anymore there are many historica...
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Funny story: Israeli hypocrite claims Hitler was a Palestinian!

Israeli hypocrite claims Hitler was a Palestinian!

Isreal PM, Netanyahu, has come out of his hypocritical closet claiming Hitler was not an Austrian, white power maniac, he claims Hitler was actually a Palestinian under-cover agent whose sole objectives were to burn Jews in hell! Germany have rapi...
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Funny story: A Look Back In Homage To John Boehner

A Look Back In Homage To John Boehner

WHAT A WEEK! [After his masterful leadership of the House of Representatives in passing a funding bill for the Department of Homeland Security, Speaker John Boehner grants an interview to a roomful of reporters from around the world.] Al Jazeera: Mr. Speaker, wouldn't you say that a legislative body that can only pass a one-week funding bill is dysfunctional? Boehner: Not at all. In fact...
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Funny story: Spanish Inland Revenue feels sorry for Messi!

Spanish Inland Revenue feels sorry for Messi!

Lionel Messi, super-star footballer who applies his trade in Spain, Barcelona, to be precise, has many allies in the Spanish Inland Revenue; and they all feel sorry for him! Exactly how many millions he earns nobody really knows, but tax officers...
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Funny story: EPA Formally Declares Humans are Danger to Environment

EPA Formally Declares Humans are Danger to Environment

WASHINGTON, DC - The United States EPA announced today that humans threaten public health and the environment. "The administration will not ignore science or the law any longer, nor will we avoid the responsibility we owe to our children and our g...
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Funny story: Jason Segel Definitely Read All of "Infinite Jest" Before Shooting "End of The Tour"

Jason Segel Definitely Read All of "Infinite Jest" Before Shooting "End of The Tour"

Jason Segel stars as the critically acclaimed writer in End of the Tour, which tells the story of the five-day interview between Wallace and journalist David Lipsky, played by Jesse Eisenberg. In a statement released on Friday, the press has been...
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Funny story: No Sex - We're British!

No Sex - We're British!

As the sex allegations against Top People begin to tumble into the gutter our intrepid hack Josh Wanker has been interviewed by the Police at the centre of the Investigations. After the interview Wanker told me 'There's nothing in it. They stopped...
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Funny story: Tory leader tells the truth

Tory leader tells the truth

In a remarkable turnaround in party policy, David Cameron, Conservative head and Prime Minister, has pledged to pursue an honest approach to politics. His message to Conference was, "From now on we're going to tell the truth." "Yes, it's risky," s...
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Funny story: Donut Miracle Converts Thousands to Christianity

Donut Miracle Converts Thousands to Christianity

Mobile, AL - Well-respected local, Jamie McGinn, woke up on October 17th like it was any other day. Little did she know, her routine Saturday donut run would be far from normal. On her way back into the house from her trip to Dan's Donuts, she trippe...
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Funny story: Disabled man sues mountain for discrimination

Disabled man sues mountain for discrimination

A disabled man who was unable to climb the Ben Nevis mountain in Scotland was unlawfully discriminated against and deserved an apology, a tribunal has ruled. John Dixon, 43, from Stowmarket, Suffolk was keen to climb the UK's tallest mountain, unt...
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Funny story: Bill Clinton Rates Bimbos: Monica "Most Fun I've Had With My Pants On ..."

Bill Clinton Rates Bimbos: Monica "Most Fun I've Had With My Pants On ..."

BILLINGSGATE POST: Hardly a day goes by that news of Slick Willie being linked to a bimbo doesn't make headlines. With Hillary's run for president, long past trysts are being recalled by victims of his charm. Gennifer Flowers, who claims to have h...
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Funny story: VW turns back the clock!

VW turns back the clock!

German giant VW has promised to turn back the clock and remove all computers / software from their cars, and go back to basics. Second world war Beetles, still produced in Mexico, will now be produced in Wolfsburg, Germany, and Golf's will be offered...
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Funny story: Hot Closet Sex Romp May Have Burned Hillary's Email Server: Bimbo Not Named

Hot Closet Sex Romp May Have Burned Hillary's Email Server: Bimbo Not Named

BILLINGSGATE POST: A leaked report from FBI Headquarters places blame for Hillary's missing emails squarely on an amorous encounter that took place on top of the server that was located in a closet in the Clinton's home in Chappaqua, NY. DNA evid...
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Funny story: Ten things men look for in a woman

Ten things men look for in a woman

In a survey from Thailand to Morocco men's magazine "U-R-FKD" discovered that men's taste in women had not changed over thousands of years. Certain key traits however seemed to predominate over the centuries. If Cleopatra turned men on with her brains as well as her beauty many more found success in the absence of both. It really devolved to who the male was as women seemed to tick eve...
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Funny story: Selfie Stick Ruled Illegal: Violates Montana Pole Patent

Selfie Stick Ruled Illegal: Violates Montana Pole Patent

BILLINGSGATE POST: In a special ruling issued yesterday, United States Patent Judge Willard "The Rat" Helmsley, declared that the so called "selfie stick" violated the patent issued to Dr. Viscount Billingsgate for his invention of the "Montana Pole...
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Funny story: Bumper Stickers Annonymous

Bumper Stickers Annonymous

You're driving down the road and suddenly you find yourself behind a vehicle covered completely in bumper stickers. What do you do? This is exactly the question local officials are asking in the latest crackdown for road safety.
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Funny story: Republican House Committee On Benghazi Elects Hillary Clinton President

Republican House Committee On Benghazi Elects Hillary Clinton President

Wow! Not exactly their intention, but the Republican House Committee on Benghazi managed to present Hillary Clinton, the former Secretary of State and US Senator from New York, as knowledgeable, accurate, professional and presidential; clearly, not t...
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Funny story: "Enough Whistleblowing," says everyone, as Anonymous threatens to publish your porn search history

"Enough Whistleblowing," says everyone, as Anonymous threatens to publish your porn search history

Rocked Britain was concerned for it's mates yesterday as news leaked that Anonymous, a group of 12 year old virgins from Buttfuck County Arizona, intend to publish your internet porn search history online in frustration at the girl at band camp not...
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Funny story: Dentist Walter Palmer has offered to stick his head in a lion's mouth!

Dentist Walter Palmer has offered to stick his head in a lion's mouth!

After slaughtering Cecil the lion, and then being declared innocent by Robert Mugabe, Zimbabwe's over popular, serial-killing president, Walter Palmer has offered the lions revenge by promising to stick his head in a lion's mouth! He has offered t...
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Funny story: No Longer Bringing Home The Bacon

No Longer Bringing Home The Bacon

Processed meat causes cancer! We were so shocked when we read (skimmed it and looked for pictures) the report, through a haze of Shisha smoke, we were outraged. We quickly like two cigarettes each to calm our nerves and called up the most sciency sci...
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Funny story: Senator John McCain Advocates Afghanistan As 51st State

Senator John McCain Advocates Afghanistan As 51st State

Senate Armed Services Committee Chairman John McCain (R-Ariz.) said Thursday he was "pleased" by the Presidents decision to keep 5,500 U.S. troops in Afghanistan after 2016, but pressed for "a surge of 17,000 more boots on the ground for that country...
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Funny story: St Albans sinkhole: 3D street artist gets it all wrong

St Albans sinkhole: 3D street artist gets it all wrong

A well-known pavement artist who has created many of the most famous 3D street paintings got it all wrong today when he attempted to trick homeowners in St Albans that their street had collapsed into a gigantic hole. The publicity stunt backfired...
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Funny story: Trump Inspired to Follow Webb's Lead in Admitting Murder on National Television

Trump Inspired to Follow Webb's Lead in Admitting Murder on National Television

Las Vegas, Nevada - At the Democratic debates in Las Vegas last night, the closing question posed by moderator Anderson Cooper was a unique one. Each candidate was given 90 seconds to identify the enemy they were most proud of making during their lif...
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Funny story: The Sewage and the Sorrow

The Sewage and the Sorrow

Bulging and bellicose, Masha Krause is a bit of a curiosity in the town of Statesville N.C. As an amateur bodybuilder she has made a lonely niche for herself among the more reserved and conventional residents. Last summer things got ugly for Masha as an ongoing feud she'd had with her neighbors reached it's tipping point. It all started on the somber autumn day of October 14th last year. "Hog...
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Funny story: Bookies Profits on Jimmy Savile Inquiry Continue.

Bookies Profits on Jimmy Savile Inquiry Continue.

The following is quoted directly from a The Spoof.com article dating from November 2013. Savile was connected to almost 600 cases of abuse in total. Inquiry into Savile's past began immediately after his death in October 2011. This resulted in a Newsnight program that was hastily stopped from being screened. The Spoof article concerned a a Bookies' bogus view of the official police inquiry tha...
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Funny story: Reggae Star Immortal Cocaine Case; Herb Alpert Occupying Half A Mountain John Lydon Lives On

Reggae Star Immortal Cocaine Case; Herb Alpert Occupying Half A Mountain John Lydon Lives On

"Herb" Alpert and Gregory Isaacs are both made entirely out of cocaine - I myself personally saw Gregory Isaac's crew lift Him onto the stage where He glinted among the lights, reflected by the diamond-fillingrettes and filligreed teeth of the attend...
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Funny story: Kim Davis: "Pole Dancing Helps Me Pray"

Kim Davis: "Pole Dancing Helps Me Pray"

In an odd twist to the ever bizarre story of Kentucky clerk Kim Davis, a new interview in Christian Bigot Magazine unveils more secrets of the so-called conservative. "When I'm home alone, which ain't often with four ex husbands and several basta...
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Funny story: Trump to Germany: Nobody out-cheats the good old U.S. of A!

Trump to Germany: Nobody out-cheats the good old U.S. of A!

In a recent press interview, leading Republican Presidential contender Donald Trump was asked for his thoughts on the recent Volkswagen scandal in which it installed "defeat devices" in millions of its diesel-powered cars to dupe emission tests to ma...
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Funny story: Children Who Whisper at Risk for Psychosis in Adulthood

Children Who Whisper at Risk for Psychosis in Adulthood

Atlanta, GA: The Center for Disease Control issued an alarming report that states a child's risk for developing serious psychiatric disorders in adulthood increased by 62% if they excessively "whispered". Lawrence Lipschitz M.D. said parents shoul...
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Funny story: GDR experts asked by Merkel how to build a new wall!

GDR experts asked by Merkel how to build a new wall!

Ex GDR wall builders have been invited by German chancellor, Angela Merkel, to give their advice in how to build a wall around the southern borders of Germany between Austria, Czech Republic and Lichtenstein. It seems that Merkels' policy of carte...
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Funny story: Clinton Slams Bush: 'Warmongering, Cynical Establishment Career Politician!'

Clinton Slams Bush: 'Warmongering, Cynical Establishment Career Politician!'

The Dynasty Wars are heating up. Never mind Romance of the Three Kingdoms. Clinton vs Bush is where it's at! Or at least, it's where the money's at, anyways! See the transcript of Clinton's latest semi-public post on the notable TOR website known as Dark Internet Policy Forum: Jeb Bush? Look, I strongly believe in America and in meritocracy. OK? I just can't accept that in America, of all...
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Funny story: My trousers

My trousers

I have never thought of myself as a fashion icon, but an experience I have recently had has made me think again. When I work in the garden I use an old pair of denim trousers, torn with holes all over them. Recently I was gardening and remembered that we needed to get some milk. So I downed tools and set off for the shops. I had not changed my trousers and realised I had also forgotten to w...
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Funny story: China loses its (golf) balls!

China loses its (golf) balls!

The Chinese Communist party has gone back to the future by banning members from joining golf clubs! Mao Tse Tung, communist legend and evil dictator once lost his balls and slightly less evil dictator, Adolf H, only had one, but this has nothing to d...
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Funny story: Manor Park Man Astounded To Encounter Dossers And Whores At The Local ATM

Manor Park Man Astounded To Encounter Dossers And Whores At The Local ATM

A Manor Park man who wishes to be anonymous, despite everybody knowing him, was stunned to be asked for "a pahnd" by a dosser at the BR station cashpoint on Thursday night at 8pm. He fended this affront off claiming he had no money, neck-punching...
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Funny story: Oscar Pistorius' Uncle buys bullet-proof pyjamas

Oscar Pistorius' Uncle buys bullet-proof pyjamas

Reuters, South Africa: Arnold Pistorius, the Uncle of convicted killer Oscar Pistorius has purchased a pair of bullet-proof pyjamas, it has been revealed. Oscar is now living at Uncle Arnold's mansion on Lawley Street, amidst controversy about whe...
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Funny story: John Kerry 'Accidentally' Nukes The Onion, Sky Doesn't Fall In (1/2)

John Kerry 'Accidentally' Nukes The Onion, Sky Doesn't Fall In (1/2)

Notable public figure, hilariously swiftboated, um, SWIFTBOAT political celebrity and darling of the MSNBC broadcasting-apologetical complex John Kerry… Well, he's just made yet another honest mistake in a somewhat lengthy line of honest mistakes. John Kerry has put his hermeneutical philosophy of 'The Constitution is a living document' into practice via a creative reinterpretation of the Fi...
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Funny story: Focus Group Loses Sight Of Hillary

Focus Group Loses Sight Of Hillary

BILLINGSGATE POST: QUESTION: If your eyes looked like two piss holes in a snowbank, and your lips were pink like a rooster's dink; you had chipmunk cheeks bouncing around every which-way when your phony jackass laugh sent folks up the wall, and you...
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Funny story: Webb: Vietnam was 'happiest time of my life'

Webb: Vietnam was 'happiest time of my life'

Following Tuesday night's first Democratic presidential primary debate, former senator Jim Webb was given a chance to clarify one of the most memorable comments of the evening. Asked which enemy of his he is most proud of, Webb replied, "I'd have...
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Funny story: Hurricane Patricia Disappoints Cable News Networks

Hurricane Patricia Disappoints Cable News Networks

MIAMI, FL - U.S. NOA forecasters say Hurricane Patricia has crossed into Mexico and has caused little damage, dashing the hopes of cable news networks. Hurricane Patricia did not produce the devastating results that all cable networks predicted, d...
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Funny story: New Debut Album Sure Fire Hit for Schillings

New Debut Album Sure Fire Hit for Schillings

Fritz Schillings son of Keith Schillings of the Schillings global legal firm that deal with defamation notably of the high and mighty... and who have many celebrities on its books including J.K. Rowling... has begun a career in music. This is a big surprise to those who know him as his penchant for musical expression is a complete mystery to all of them. Nevertheless, Fritz has released a new...
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