There were 2,129 spoof news stories published in 2015. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to browse the spoof news archives.

Funny story: African American Men To Be Fitted With Body Cameras

African American Men To Be Fitted With Body Cameras

African American males across the United States are to be equipped with body cameras in an attempt to combat the ever increasing crimes committed against them by law enforcement officers. Experts say that placing cameras on the potential victims r...
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Funny story: Gay Owned Pizza Shop Refuses To Serve Straights

Gay Owned Pizza Shop Refuses To Serve Straights

The gay owners of an Indiana pizza shop are refusing to serve hetrosexual customers. The news comes a little after a week Indiana passed the Religious Freedom Restoration Act, which critics say would allow businesses to openly discriminate against...
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Funny story: Clint Eastwood's Butler Knows Its Only A Matter of Time

Clint Eastwood's Butler Knows Its Only A Matter of Time

Carmel, Ca - For the past three years Clint Eastwoood's butler, Arthur Grimes, has prepared himself for the inevitable day that he will be out of a job after finding his employer dead. "Every morning I check the classifieds and check in with an em...
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Funny story: Whole Family Dreading Family Time

Whole Family Dreading Family Time

What seemed like a good idea at the time, a South Florida man is now dreading the family time he insisted upon, an event he hoped would unite his warring daughters, son and wife. Duncan Whitehead - overweight, suffering from gout and bad teeth; ca...
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Funny story: FIFA Scandal: Jack Warner Reveals Everything

FIFA Scandal: Jack Warner Reveals Everything

Former Fifa vice-president Jack Warner has revealed himself on live TV causing a massive electricty surge in the tiny nation of Trinidad and Tobago. Mr Warner, who said he feared for his life, also said he could link Fifa officials to the German i...
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Funny story: 2010 World Cup To Be Replayed

2010 World Cup To Be Replayed

The 2010 FIFA World Cup, originally played in South Africa, is to be replayed next week in the United State after the country admitted paying Fifa $10m to host the 2010 tournament. "It's only fair," said one man, just days after FIFA President S...
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Funny story: Altzeimer's Cure Worries

Altzeimer's Cure Worries

Members of Lord Janner's family are reported to be very pleased about the news that a cure for Altzeimers disease has been discovered. The latest discovery comes just in time for Lord Janner to clear his name in an open trial of all suggestions th...
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Funny story: Kanye West Forces Walmart Employee of The Month to Give Award To Beyonce

Kanye West Forces Walmart Employee of The Month to Give Award To Beyonce

Kanye West has accused Walmart of "disrespecting shelf stacking" by handing Dave Goddard of Fort Lauderdale an employee of the month award instead of Beyonce, after interrupting the awards ceremony, held in the break room of the superstore located so...
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Funny story: It's Just A Man In A Dress Says Old Lady

It's Just A Man In A Dress Says Old Lady

89 Year old Betty Jenkins, from Savannah Georgia, says she is completely befuddled by the hype surrounding so called "courageous hero" Bruce Jenner and his alter ego Caitlyn Jenner. "It's a man in a dress, with a wig, dollops of make up in an imag...
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Funny story: Cat image sparks social media buzz: Is it taking a dump or having a piss?

Cat image sparks social media buzz: Is it taking a dump or having a piss?

Hot on the heels of that fucking irrelvant gold/blue dress social media storm another intriguing image is generating massive Internet buzz. The image of a cat, which is either shitting or taking a piss on a Florida man's pair of FUCKING expensive...
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Funny story: Brian Williams Fondly Recalls Winning Olympic Gold Medal, Winning Oscar & Landing On The Moon

Brian Williams Fondly Recalls Winning Olympic Gold Medal, Winning Oscar & Landing On The Moon

"NBC Nightly News" anchor Brian Williams could face new questions this week over differing versions of a story he repeatedly told about winning an Olympic Gold Medal in 1976. The Washington Post reported late Sunday that Williams has given differi...
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Funny story: Caricature of Muhammad Ali Leads To Death Threat

Caricature of Muhammad Ali Leads To Death Threat

A cartoon caricature of former World Heavyweight Champion Muhammad Ali which was tweeted to over seven people has led to a death threat against the tweeter in what is being seen as another attack on freedom of speech. "So what I tweeted a picture...
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Funny story: Cellphones Announce Selfie-free Sundays

Cellphones Announce Selfie-free Sundays

Cellphones are disgusted with the amount (too many!) and general quality (awful!) of selfies, and they want everyone to know about it. So yesterday in NYC's Times Square they held a press conference to tell the world that they had come to an impor...
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Funny story: World's Second Oldest Person Admits Chances Of Keeping Title For Long Doubtful

World's Second Oldest Person Admits Chances Of Keeping Title For Long Doubtful

Just days after becoming the world's oldest documented person, 116-year-old Gertrude Weaver died Monday in Arkansas. Weaver became the oldest person in the world after the death of a 117-year-old Japanese woman last week, according to records kept...
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Funny story: Black Cat Who Successfully Sued Owner For Not Recognizing Him As A White Dog Killed

Black Cat Who Successfully Sued Owner For Not Recognizing Him As A White Dog Killed

A black cat named 'Mike', who successfully sued his former owner for not recognizing that he is in fact a white dog trapped inside the wrong body with the wrong colored skin, has died. The law suit, which was filed last week in Fort Lauderdale, Fl...
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Funny story: Teddy Bears Protest Planned Closing of FAO Schwarz

Teddy Bears Protest Planned Closing of FAO Schwarz

Even for New Yorkers who think they've seen it all, this was a unique sighting! Yesterday on Fifth Avenue in NYC, a large group of teddy bears protested the planned July closing of the world-famous toy store FAO Schwarz. The bears staged the prote...
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Funny story: Martians: Earth Day, Phooey! We Want a Mars Day!

Martians: Earth Day, Phooey! We Want a Mars Day!

The little green creatures have made up their minds that they aren't going to sit silently through another Earth Day while their own planet remains unrecognized. No siree! Yesterday a bunch of Martians held a protest on the steps of the main bran...
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Funny story: New York Babies Start Yakking at Birth

New York Babies Start Yakking at Birth

A seven-week old baby who said HELLO has become a worldwide sensation, but New Yorkers are unimpressed. That's because it's always been rumored that New York babies, when no one is around, start yakking shortly after leaving the womb. An intrepid reporter from TheSpoof.com decided to test the truth of the rumor by setting up a hidden video cam in a nursery for newborns at a NY hospital. It turn...
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Funny story: Atheist Writer Abandons Atheism. Looks For ANY Religion After Realizing Majority of Atheists Actually Morons

Atheist Writer Abandons Atheism. Looks For ANY Religion After Realizing Majority of Atheists Actually Morons

A Florida author has vowed to abandon atheism and find religion after realizing that many of his fellow atheists are complete and utter morons. Duncan Whitehead of Miami, author of several badly edited, self-published pieces of 'drivel' and well k...
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Funny story: Brad Pitt Has Brain Removed To Prevent Brain Disease

Brad Pitt Has Brain Removed To Prevent Brain Disease

Two years after his wife underwent a double mastectomy to cut her cancer risk, actress and U.N. envoy Angelina Jolie today had surgery to remove her ovaries and fallopian tubes for the same reason, she wrote in The New York Times on Tuesday. Her...
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Funny story: Twitter Birdies Plan Surprise Party for Outgoing CEO

Twitter Birdies Plan Surprise Party for Outgoing CEO

Don't be angry if your tweets are slightly delayed over the next few days. It's all for a good cause. You see, the birdies are busy preparing for the surprise party they are throwing for the CEO of Twitter, who is leaving his post as of July 1.
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Funny story: North West Blabs about NYC Fashion Week

North West Blabs about NYC Fashion Week

Once upon a time there was a little girl taken to Fashion Week in NYC. Her name was North West. She didn't find it fun at all. In fact, she cried to show her displeasure. It wasn't a tantrum, she had reasons for crying. And now we know those re...
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Funny story: After Two Bushes As President, "Is There Finally Going To Be Real One?", Asks Man

After Two Bushes As President, "Is There Finally Going To Be Real One?", Asks Man

With Hillary Clinton looking more likely to run for President in 2016 many are celebrating that at last a real "Bush" will be in the White House. One man said "After two Bush's it is great to finally have a real Bush walking the corridors of the W...
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Funny story: Starbucks Baristas Study; Customers Squawk

Starbucks Baristas Study; Customers Squawk

Lots of kudos for Starbucks when it was announced that the company was initiating a program to pay college tuition for its baristas. No applause from the customers though. Baristas are so wrapped up in their studies, the level of service has dec...
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Funny story: Princess Charlotte Is Already Tweeting!

Princess Charlotte Is Already Tweeting!

Yep, you read that right. She started at four days old and there's no stopping her. Here's a sample of her tweets: -- Slept through homecoming from the hospital. I was bored. -- Hate my plain knitted cap. Fit for a peasant. Would it have kil...
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Funny story: Man Threatens To Call Police After Claiming Someone Stole His 'Joke'

Man Threatens To Call Police After Claiming Someone Stole His 'Joke'

A prolific tweeter and self styled comedy guru/genius has began taking medication to help him sleep after spending countless nights wide awake and worrying that someone may steal one of his twitter jokes; which he didn't write in the first place.
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Funny story: Neighborhood Snitches, Nosy Neighbors & Anonymous Tipsters Possess Same Gene As Nazi Collaborators

Neighborhood Snitches, Nosy Neighbors & Anonymous Tipsters Possess Same Gene As Nazi Collaborators

So called 'snoops', who contact city officials regarding code violations, minor infringements against city ordinances, complain about one off parties and call the police at the first sign of an ethnic minority in their vicinity have the same gene, ac...
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Funny story: Jihadi John Says Dress is White and Gold

Jihadi John Says Dress is White and Gold

"Jihadi John" or Mohammed Emwazi, a west London man believed to be an ISIS militant - and chief executioner - has waded mask first into the "is this dress gold and white or is it blue and black?" melee by declaring that the dress is 'definitely'white...
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Funny story: Kanye West Planning To Storm Oscar Stage If Beyonce Doesn't Win Best Actress Award

Kanye West Planning To Storm Oscar Stage If Beyonce Doesn't Win Best Actress Award

Rapper, trophy husband and all round 'cock' Kanye West, who reprized his infamous stunt at Sunday night's Grammy awards, by unexpectedly taking the Staples Center stage as Beck was accepting the Album of the Year award has told friends (hangers on)...
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Funny story: Voters to Choose Face for Front of $10 Bill

Voters to Choose Face for Front of $10 Bill

Now that Alexander Hamilton is being booted from the front of the $10 bill, the competition is heating up among leading female candidates to replace him. The finalists have been announced by the Treasury Department, and voting by U.S. citizens ha...
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Funny story: Allison Williams: "My Dad Did Not Lie - Have More Respect For The Man Who Invented Dinosaurs"

Allison Williams: "My Dad Did Not Lie - Have More Respect For The Man Who Invented Dinosaurs"

Allison Williams has spoken out in defense of her NBC Nightly News anchor dad Brian Williams who has been suspended from work without pay for being a liar. During a Q&A with Seth Meyers at New York's 92Y, the Peter Pan actress spoke out about...
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Funny story: Man From Duck Dynasty With Silly Looking Beard Talks Utter Crap

Man From Duck Dynasty With Silly Looking Beard Talks Utter Crap

The star of the US TV reality show Duck Dynasty is facing criticism after a speech that included a graphic story about Stephen Hawking being struck by lighting. Phil Robertson, one of the ones who has a stupid beard and looks like a "bit of a too...
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Funny story: Airbag giant explodes with ideas to repurpose its rejects

Airbag giant explodes with ideas to repurpose its rejects

Tokyo - The largest recall in automotive history has left auto-parts fabricator Takata holding the bag… Or more specifically holding 34 million defective airbags. Problem is, the devices have a tendency to go off like bombs, whenever the weath...
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Funny story: Lawyers sue Brian Williams for 'lying without a license'

Lawyers sue Brian Williams for 'lying without a license'

New York -- Suspended NBC news anchor Brian Williams is in trouble with the American Bar Association. The lawyers group has filed suit in Federal District Court here, charging that Williams is "cutting into our territory by lying, fibbing, and genera...
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Funny story: Hillary's reasons for a private email server are revealed

Hillary's reasons for a private email server are revealed

Washington, DC -- Unannounced presidential candidate Hillary Clinton had more than a few good reasons for operating her own email server while she served as Secretary of State. Unfortunately, they were all on that server, which has malfunctioned and...
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Funny story: Charles and Camilla Mark 10th Aniversary With A Good Old Fashioned Wank

Charles and Camilla Mark 10th Aniversary With A Good Old Fashioned Wank

LONDON - The heir to the British throne and his consort, Camilla, are celebrating 10 years of marriage -- a decade in which Camilla's public image has gone from aristocratic home-wrecker to admired addition to the royal family. Prince Charles...
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Funny story: Alexander ($10 Bill) Hamilton Holds Press Confernce in NYC

Alexander ($10 Bill) Hamilton Holds Press Confernce in NYC

Sure he's dead, but that didn't stop him from appearing before a huge crowd in Times Square yesterday to complain about the Treasury Department's plans to boot him from the front of the $10 bill. "It's an outrage," he told the crowd, continuing, "...
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Funny story: Man Walking Dog In Woods Doesn't Find Murder Victim

Man Walking Dog In Woods Doesn't Find Murder Victim

A man walking his dog in a wooded area near Evesham has told friends how, despite expecting to any minute, he didn't find a mutilated corpse, the victim of some gruesome revenge killing or spontaneous, frenzied 'rape-gone-wrong'. The man, Ernest N...
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Funny story: Federer - Losing Was Quite Enjoyable Experience

Federer - Losing Was Quite Enjoyable Experience

Roger Federer, the 33-year-old Swiss tennis star went down 6-4 7-6(7-5) 4-6 7-6 (7-5) to Andreas Seppi in the Australian Open this morning, becoming momentarily confused by the strange but enjoyable experience of losing. "Actually, losing gives m...
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Funny story: Tony Blair Calls for the Restoration of Pope Benedict XVI -- Announces International "Bring Back Benny" Campaign

Tony Blair Calls for the Restoration of Pope Benedict XVI -- Announces International "Bring Back Benny" Campaign

London-Former British Prime Minister and converted Catholic Tony Blair called upon the Vatican today to immediately remove "dangerously subversive" Pope Francis I, and reinstate his "politically more realistic" predecessor, Pope Benedict XVI.
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Funny story: Twitter Fury After Man Calls Leonard Nimoy One Trick Pony. Which He Was. There, I Said It.

Twitter Fury After Man Calls Leonard Nimoy One Trick Pony. Which He Was. There, I Said It.

Fans of Star Wars actor Leonard Nimoy who was buried in Los Angeles in a small, private funeral on Sunday are said to be enraged after one man dared to call the actor "a one trick pony". Nimoy, 83, who died on Friday of chronic obstructive pulmon...
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Funny story: Apple Watch's killer app: it reinvents time

Apple Watch's killer app: it reinvents time

Cupertino, California -- Enthusiasm for the launch of Apple Watch zoomed off the charts this week, as reviewers focused on an advanced capability of the digital timepiece. It is an exclusive app called the "Apple Global Time Zone™ and it promis...
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Funny story: Pro Golfers Think Bubba is a Total Wad

Pro Golfers Think Bubba is a Total Wad

Augusta, Georgia - On the eve of the 79th Master's Golf Tournament, ESPN revealed some of the answers to an unofficial, impromptu poll that they have been conducting over the last several tournaments. And according to these surveys, 2-time Master's w...
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Funny story: Palace Deny Duke of York Had 10,000 Men

Palace Deny Duke of York Had 10,000 Men

Buckingham Palace issued a new denial Sunday of allegations that the Grand Old Duke of York ever 'had' 10,000 men. The ten thousand men, identified in legal documents only as "John Doe #1 - #1000," have alleged, in a child's nursery rhyme, that th...
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Funny story: 10 Things You Need to Know About Donald Trump's Presidential Run

10 Things You Need to Know About Donald Trump's Presidential Run

Atlantic City, New Jersey -- Casino kingpin and reality TV star Donald Trump has put together an "exploratory committee" that will help him determine whether or not to run for President. Here are 10 things you have to look forward to if the panel gives him the green light: 1. His wig will have its own motorcade. 2. Expressing a preference for staying alive, Trump refuses Secret Service prote...
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Funny story: The Jackass Whisperer, Daniel Snyder, now takes center stage

The Jackass Whisperer, Daniel Snyder, now takes center stage

It's time for the worst NFL owner to have his celebrity again. Yes, it's Daniel Snyder's time to shine. Snyder has been the principal owner of the Washington Re*sk*ns pro football team since 1999. This season, Snyder's team went 4-12 - for a wallo...
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Funny story: Mets fans suspended for use of delusion enhancing drugs

Mets fans suspended for use of delusion enhancing drugs

New York -- Major League Baseball has banned the entire fan base of the New York Mets from participating in any aspect of the game. The ruling by new MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred takes effect immediately and lasts until the end of the current season.
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Funny story: NBA Issues Clarification on Rules On Fouls Involving Players with Priapism

NBA Issues Clarification on Rules On Fouls Involving Players with Priapism

In response to complaints from Civil Rights organizations representing people with chronic Priapism, the NBA has issued a memorandum of understanding regarding its rules. "Players with permanent boners cannot be run out of the NBA," a spokesman fo...
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Funny story: Ad Claiming 'Ellen Lied', Lied! Ace Investigative Reporter Dick Scrotum Exposes the Lie behind the Lie!

Ad Claiming 'Ellen Lied', Lied! Ace Investigative Reporter Dick Scrotum Exposes the Lie behind the Lie!

We've all seen the gif--Ellen DeGeneres glancing guiltily over her shoulder again and again while the headline screams: "Cover Girl Drops Ellen! Ellen feels ashamed she lied to her fans for years. See the secret she hid so well! [arrow]." Now Spo...
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Funny story: Derelict Soap Dispenser Found At School

Derelict Soap Dispenser Found At School

Authorities in the Thai capital of Bangkok have today said that an ancient soap dispenser has been discovered in the toilets at a school in the city, prompting fears that, at one time, soap may have been used to wash children's hands after they had v...
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Funny story: Belichick Bets Infamous "Half-Sleeved Hoodie" on Championship Game

Belichick Bets Infamous "Half-Sleeved Hoodie" on Championship Game

Foxborough, MA - During Friday's post-practice interview, Patriot's head coach, Bill Belichick stated that he would "bet my hoodie that we take home the AFC championship this year." These are strong words from a reserved coach who has coached th...
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Funny story: Agassi Admits To 'Shorts Stuffing' During Majors

Agassi Admits To 'Shorts Stuffing' During Majors

Trump's Palm Coconuts Resort, FL - Since retiring from professional tennis in 2006, Andre Agassi has professed to the world that he didn't enjoy the game for many years while playing, and that his famous gold locks were indeed glued on - as he starte...
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Funny story: 130 Year Old Mongolian Mummified Mummy Not Dead, Just Having a Long Rest

130 Year Old Mongolian Mummified Mummy Not Dead, Just Having a Long Rest

Jaggedone's CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) immortal reporter, Wan-Kin-Dik, has just sent this amazing story from a monastery in Mongolia. It seems that after discovering a mummified body of a Buddhist monk, living monks are claiming he is not d...
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Funny story: Apple grabs the wrist for its next fashion destination

Apple grabs the wrist for its next fashion destination

Cupertino, California -- Following up on the overwhelming success of its family of smart wristwatches, Apple has staked out the area where your hand joins your arm as the market space for a new line of standalone fashions. Meet Apple Wrist Wearables.
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Funny story: Ear of the Tiger

Ear of the Tiger

First, there was the photo showing Tiger Woods missing front tooth. Now, a more recent photo shows that Tiger is also missing his left ear. When asked about it by a reporter, Tiger nonchalantly shrugged it off saying, "It's due to a shaving acc...
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Funny story: Town decides to ban other kinds of software on computer shops after banning Dota

Town decides to ban other kinds of software on computer shops after banning Dota

IGNORAN, CE (Acme World News) -- Few weeks ago, it has been reported that the town of Protacio, CE bans Dota in all computer shops in that area due to increasing crime rate. Recently, this same town now bans other kinds of software, which is in fa...
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Funny story: Crazy NFL Offseason Continues with Star Traded for Snickers Bar

Crazy NFL Offseason Continues with Star Traded for Snickers Bar

Just when you thought you had seen it all this busy first week of free agency in the NFL one team went the extra mile to make the most ridiculous trade of the year. The Dallas Cowboys have traded perennial "bridesmaid but never a bride" quarterb...
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Funny story: 'Fifty Shades of Grime' makes record sales

'Fifty Shades of Grime' makes record sales

A new light fiction novel is going like hot - cakes World - wide, with record Translation Sales in Switzerland. The novel presents sexy , middle - aged people's bedroom romps and their household cleaning habits. The Protagonist, Felicity , is a...
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Funny story: 4 days Before the Megafight, Pacquiao Revealed: "Bruce Lee is my Biological Father"

4 days Before the Megafight, Pacquiao Revealed: "Bruce Lee is my Biological Father"

As the whole world is preparing for the upcoming fight of the century between the era's two greatest boxers- Mayweather and Pacquiao, the only eight-division world champion Manny "Pacman" Pacquiao broke the silence as he revealed one of the most shoc...
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Funny story: Pope sells Lent to the Scamatologists for $69 billion

Pope sells Lent to the Scamatologists for $69 billion

The Vatican -- The Roman Catholic Church has given up Lent. In an unprecedented financial maneuver, Pope Francis has turned over the 40 day, 40 night period of atonement to the Church of Scamatology. The sale price was $69 billion. That buys the...
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Funny story: Cheesy law regarding football spawns other gridiron lunacy

Cheesy law regarding football spawns other gridiron lunacy

BAINBRIDGE ISLAND, WA -- Bainbridge Island, Washington, has outlawed cheese. At least, during the upcoming NFC Championship game that pits the Seattle Seahawks against the Green Bay Packers. And it's not only cheese per se that's banned, but al...
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Funny story: Micheal Jordan Orders a Fleet of Lamborghini Golf Carts

Micheal Jordan Orders a Fleet of Lamborghini Golf Carts

Jupiter, Florida - If you only know two things about Micheal Jordan, it's that he likes to play basketball, and that he likes to play golf - and he likes to do both of these things, very fast! Since retiring from the basketball world, Micheal Jor...
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Funny story: Celebrity Paedophile, ***** *******, Fucking Hates ******, ****** & ******** Cunts

Celebrity Paedophile, ***** *******, Fucking Hates ******, ****** & ******** Cunts

Well known celebrity paedophile, child molester and closet homosexual *** ***** ******* announced today that he 'fucking hates *******, **** and ****** cunts' and that if he had his way everyone would be allowed to have ****** and the right to burn d...
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Funny story: Rory Breaks Up With Hampster, Wins Twice!

Rory Breaks Up With Hampster, Wins Twice!

Charlotte, NC - It seems to any keen golf fan that World #1 golfer, Rory McIlroy, plays best after he has parted ways in a relationship. Last year, after kicking his fiancee, Woz, to the curb, he immediately won two big tournaments. Now, according to...
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Funny story: Sportz Illustrious covergirl out to prove she has beauty as well as brawn

Sportz Illustrious covergirl out to prove she has beauty as well as brawn

Bantamweight champ Rhonda Rowdy, who is scheduled to face Cat Scratch Zinger in UFC's pay-per-perv headliner Feb. 28 cat fight, has won another title, prior to her upcoming bout: Sportz Illustrious has named the hellcat the cover girl for its annual...
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Funny story: Phil Mickelson Can't Stop All The Hat-Tipping Nonsense!

Phil Mickelson Can't Stop All The Hat-Tipping Nonsense!

Scottsdale, Arizona - Chip Fairway, here at the world famous PGA Training Facility of Scottsdale, where pro players can undergo any number of tests they think will help lower their score out on the course. A well-trained team of doctors, swing coache...
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Funny story: Top 10 Ways to Coax Alex Rodriguez off the Yankees

Top 10 Ways to Coax Alex Rodriguez off the Yankees

The Bronx - - The New York Yankees appear to have had enough of Alex Rodriguez. They don't like the way he "talks the talk." They don't care for the way he "walks the walk." But what really upsets them is how his contract will "yank the bank" if...
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Funny story: Golfer Furyk Spotted Selling Tartan Jacket Trophy After Win at Hilton Head

Golfer Furyk Spotted Selling Tartan Jacket Trophy After Win at Hilton Head

Hilton Head, South Carolina - Our man on the golf scene, Chip Fairway, had been at the RBC Heritage Golf Tournament for four very long days - his work was done. There was nothing left to do but smudge some dirt over the scratch on his rental car and...
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Funny story: Health officials warn "Toblerone in a fridge" is a lethal weapon

Health officials warn "Toblerone in a fridge" is a lethal weapon

Top health officials have issued a warning to people not to put Toblerones in a fridge. They state that when the triangular chocolate bar becomes cold and hard it can become a "lethal weapon capable of damaging members of the public and even buildin...
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Funny story: Boys, Boys, Boys! It's what a priest dreams of.

Boys, Boys, Boys! It's what a priest dreams of.

Under-aged CIA reporter Johnny Pedo-Hunter, who has been sniffing around the Vatican looking for some dirty news, has just reported back to HQ what everybody knew anyway - kiddies porno has been found sitting on laps and tops and PCs in the holy cath...
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Funny story: Global Warming - No Longer a Threat

Global Warming - No Longer a Threat

In 1827 scientists launched a rocket into space, with the knowledge that by the time it arrived, it would be just in time to stop global warming. The fear was, that with all the snow accumulated throughout the polar ice caps and the North East part...
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Funny story: Queen caught sneaking out of the Palace and pretending to be a homeless person again

Queen caught sneaking out of the Palace and pretending to be a homeless person again

Members of the royal family and local security picked up the Queen yesterday after she went missing from Buckingham Palace. Palace guards reported her gone at lunch time shortly after Sunday mass. Prince Charles and Camilla then drove round the...
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Funny story: Sorry, North Dakota, We Need You to Take All the "Anti-Vaxxers"

Sorry, North Dakota, We Need You to Take All the "Anti-Vaxxers"

The Obama Administration today announced a plan for dealing with the Anti-vaxxer problem. At a news conference, DHHS Secretary Sylvia Mathews Burwell stated, "There are millions of children in our midst who are partially or completely unvaccinated ag...
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Funny story: Manchester United star Ashley Young banned from shopping for six months for speeding in supermarket aisle

Manchester United star Ashley Young banned from shopping for six months for speeding in supermarket aisle

Manchester United star Ashley Young has been banned from shopping for six months for speeding in a supermarket aisle. The 28-year-old England international admitted to pushing his trolley at 5mph on a 3mph section of Aisle 8 at the Tesco on Parrs...
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Funny story: NFL Has New Policy Against Cannabis Use

NFL Has New Policy Against Cannabis Use

The NFL is now extensively testing players before football games for marijuana usage. This is a recent policy change. National Footbal League Commissioner Roger Goodell gave an explanation. "The problem with Cannabis is that it is a 'peace" induc...
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Funny story: Scientist Fires Missile and Accidentally Destroys Pluto

Scientist Fires Missile and Accidentally Destroys Pluto

Huntsville, AL An astronomer/scientist at the Space Science Lab, who has so far managed to remain anonymous, has admitted to accidentally destroying Pluto with a nuclear missile. "I meant to hit the zoom so I could get a closer look at this three-...
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Funny story: Green Bay Packers Are Communists Says Congressman

Green Bay Packers Are Communists Says Congressman

The Green Bay Packers are arguably the most successful franchise in American professional sports history. They just missed this year from going to the superbowel. But the most remarkable thing about the Green Bay Packers is that as an industry th...
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Funny story: Hawaiians Denounce Movie "Aloha" As Racist

Hawaiians Denounce Movie "Aloha" As Racist

Honolulu, HI - A group of ethnic studies professors stood outside the Steve McGarret Building on the University of Hawaii campus to denounce the new Bradley Cooper movie, "Aloha", for its racist portrayal of native Hawaiians. The movie tells a sim...
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Funny story: Study finds that everything you do is "killing you"

Study finds that everything you do is "killing you"

A recent study published in the New England Journal of Medicine has concluded that every activity you perform brings you one step closer to death. DR David Katz published an article that suggests that nobody has really discovered the perfect healt...
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Funny story: Man's New Year Resolution To Kick Smoking Hobbit Leads To Restraining Order

Man's New Year Resolution To Kick Smoking Hobbit Leads To Restraining Order

A Florida man, whose New Year's resolution landed him with a restraining order, has vowed one way or another to kick actor Martin Freeman up the arse. Freeman, know for his roles in Sherlock, Love Actually, Fargo and as Bilbo Baggins in The Hobbit...
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Funny story: NFL commissioner reveals email that started inflategate investigation

NFL commissioner reveals email that started inflategate investigation

New York City, NY. - NFL commissioner, Roger Goodell, explained today that his investigation into ball pressure was sparked by an email. "I was at the stadium watching the game and dodging calls from Terrell Owens, then I received a mysterious em...
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Funny story: 'The Onion' and Six Other Fake News Websites to Close--Russell Sprouts Says: 'World Insanity Beyond Our Writers' Imaginations'

'The Onion' and Six Other Fake News Websites to Close--Russell Sprouts Says: 'World Insanity Beyond Our Writers' Imaginations'

Chicago-"The Onion" Managing Editor Russell Sprouts announced today that the well-known fake-news outlet was shutting down immediately. Six other prominent sites said they would also be closing. "We can't keep up any more," said Sprouts, speaking...
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Funny story: Misunderstood Practice of Siphoning Air From Footballs To Genitals Gets Patriots Into Trouble

Misunderstood Practice of Siphoning Air From Footballs To Genitals Gets Patriots Into Trouble

The New England Patriots have been wrongfully accused of trying to cheat the team reports. In what has ridiculously been dubbed "Deflate gate" the team has been accused of deflating the footballs after referee inspections to make them easier to...
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Funny story: A Buff Madonna Punches Out Taylor Swift and Lady GaGa

A Buff Madonna Punches Out Taylor Swift and Lady GaGa

Lost Angeles, CA Backstage at the Grammy Awards was apparently quite a rowdy affair as details are just emerging of a backstage fight. Apparently Lady Gaga had leaned in to kiss Madonna and Madonna swung and hit her, knocking her to the floor. At...
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Funny story: Extremely racist old man planning to run for U.S. president in 2016

Extremely racist old man planning to run for U.S. president in 2016

Ah, yes. Elections. The only thing more American than that is a morbidly obese 40 year old drunk man carrying an assault rifle; yelling at immigrants. Boy, we really let our forefathers down. Around 65 people are potential candidates for presiden...
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Funny story: Plethysmographic Research says Conservatives are Sexually Repressed and Brain Damaged

Plethysmographic Research says Conservatives are Sexually Repressed and Brain Damaged

Dr Moishe Pipick head of The Worldwide Center for Sexual Research at Berne University in Berne Switzerland stated today: "Our latest analysis of the causes of regressive behavior seen mostly in Christian Conservatives clearly shows that sexual re...
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Funny story: President Obama To Smite Terrorists And Bill O'Really With Golf Clubs

President Obama To Smite Terrorists And Bill O'Really With Golf Clubs

In response to mounting criticism both at home and abroad President Obama told White House staffers this morning that he fully intends to do a full Samuel L Jackson on terrorism 'in any shape or form, any place in the world' - including Faux News's B...
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Funny story: Mayo Clinic study:72% of men who hate Hillary Clinton diagnosed with PE (Pussy Envy)

Mayo Clinic study:72% of men who hate Hillary Clinton diagnosed with PE (Pussy Envy)

Mayo Clinic revealed a new study this morning which found that 72% of the men who claimed to literally hate Hillary Clinton were afflicted with PE (pussy envy). Dr. T. J. McCorkle, spokesman for the clinic, stated that the syndrome was similar to...
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Funny story: McDonalds to Hire 500 Chimpanzees In 250 Test Stores

McDonalds to Hire 500 Chimpanzees In 250 Test Stores

A major announcement from McDonald's -who like all companies forced to compete in the global marketplace - is committed to using good old American creativity and resourcefulness to beat China and India at their own game. "McDonald's will be employ...
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Funny story: "Earth is No Longer A Planet!" Announce Scientists

"Earth is No Longer A Planet!" Announce Scientists

Science Town, USA In a surprising announcement, Bulgarian scientists have shown that based on their latest calculations, Earth no longer qualified as a full planet and would have to be downgraded to a dwarf planet. Response from around Earth was...
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Funny story: A science experiment in Boston: Three stories of trash and half a $5 bill encased in ice remain as Old Man Winter heads south for a while

A science experiment in Boston: Three stories of trash and half a $5 bill encased in ice remain as Old Man Winter heads south for a while

BOSTON, Mass. - Remember that horrible Boston winter that had a blizzard effect all over the cable news networks? Well it's still around. It's not snowing on the East Coast now that Memorial Day has come and gone, but the remnants of last winter stan...
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Funny story: Police arrest man who failed to use knife and fork in Didsbury restaurant

Police arrest man who failed to use knife and fork in Didsbury restaurant

Staff and diners were left disgusted when a man eating at a restaurant blatantly refused to use his knife and fork and ate with his fingers. The 52-year-old was eating a margherita pizza at Zizzi's restaurant in Didsbury, Manchester at 1pm today.
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Funny story: Bobbi Kristina Brown is going back home to her townhouse

Bobbi Kristina Brown is going back home to her townhouse

Bobbi Kristina is set to go back home to rest in her million dollar Georgia townhouse. She will have fresh air coming into her room from an outside window. "Bobbi Kristina will be able to dream of the children she could have had when she was 18-y...
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Funny story: Man jailed for not eating a chocolate bar quickly enough

Man jailed for not eating a chocolate bar quickly enough

A former council worker who did not eat a chocolate bar quickly enough on a very hot day, leaving it completely melted, has been jailed for 11 years. Under the extended sentence for chocolate product protection, Joey Smith will have to serve two-t...
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Funny story: Statue of Liberty demolished in US immigration battle

Statue of Liberty demolished in US immigration battle

New York Harbor - - Demolition crews completed the final stages of dismantling the Statue of Liberty today. The salvage teams were following orders issued by the Republican Congress, which voted that the 129-year old symbol of freedom was on the wron...
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Funny story: Mayweather predicted to win against Pacquiao

Mayweather predicted to win against Pacquiao

Up to now, it's the richest fight ever, with the largest purses, most PPV buys, and is being boosted by public hype because of the race differences. Bruce Jenner, a superior athlete, gives his opinion on the upcoming fight, "Pacquiao has a higher...
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Funny story: Congress unveils do-it-yourself homeland security

Congress unveils do-it-yourself homeland security

Washington, DC - - With the Department of Homeland Security increasingly being used as a political football, Congress has come up with a backup plan. It's a domestic defensive strategy that relies on the American public to protect itself agai...
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Funny story: NASA discovers the "Gods of Creation"

NASA discovers the "Gods of Creation"

NASA experts, have concluded that this universe was created by advanced life forms that live outside of the universe. "We have found conclusive evidence of their existence," said Ellen Stofan, NASA chief scientist. While mission control was co...
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Funny story: Cool Sounding "Planet X" draws attention away other more worthwhile celestial bodies

Cool Sounding "Planet X" draws attention away other more worthwhile celestial bodies

Theoretical planet, Planet X is again making headlines despite the fact that there are curious discoveries on other real, existing planetary bodies. Planet X, also known as Nibiru (another cool sounding alias), is an undiscovered enormous planet...
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Funny story: National movement towards apathy gathers precisely no momentum

National movement towards apathy gathers precisely no momentum

The Young people of today who just don't care about the world around them and are generally ignorant and dismissive of politics and life in general now have a voice. Life is getting increasingly harder for the younger generation of today yet The C...
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