Funny story: Country On High Alert As Bush Family Threatens U.S. With Yet Another Bush In The White House

Country On High Alert As Bush Family Threatens U.S. With Yet Another Bush In The White House

News sources have concurred that not one, but two other members of the Bush family are threatening to seek political seats in 2016. The same family who brought you Bush I, Iraq War I and Bush the Second, Iraq War II are going to continue their assaul...
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Funny story: Brown M&M Arrested as Accomplice to Murder, Mars Fires Chocolate Spokeswoman

Brown M&M Arrested as Accomplice to Murder, Mars Fires Chocolate Spokeswoman

Maclean, Virginia - In a hastily assembled press conference given at the manufacturers of the popular M&Ms and other chocolate treats, a spokesman for the candy giant announced they would not be renewing the Brown M&M's contract. This develop...
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Funny story: Man Recognizes Turd from Family Reunion

Man Recognizes Turd from Family Reunion

A local man recognized a turd from his family reunion recently when his toilet overflowed unexpectedly. "He seemed familiar to me," said the man, "Like he made a big splash and didn't go quietly. I knew this turd well. He had holed up inside of...
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Funny story: Gennifer Flowers names Hillary Clinton as Edward Snowden's real birth mother

Gennifer Flowers names Hillary Clinton as Edward Snowden's real birth mother

New York - The woman who shagged Bill Clinton for 12 years has revealed that CIA turncoat Edward Snowden is presidential wannabe Hillary Clinton's natural son. Gennifer Flowers says she found out after seeing a secret DNA report at the Clinton gub...
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Funny story: Pope Urges Catholics to Be More Compassionate, and adds that if they aren't that "They Will Be Excommunicated, Smitten by The Almighty and Banished to Hell FOREVER!"

Pope Urges Catholics to Be More Compassionate, and adds that if they aren't that "They Will Be Excommunicated, Smitten by The Almighty and Banished to Hell FOREVER!"

VATICAN CITY - Pope Francis said Catholics should not allow their views on gay marriage, abortion and contraception to dominate Catholic teachings, but must be more welcoming and not cold, dogmatic bastards. In a dramatically blunt interview with...
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Funny story: SNAP! Republicans Embrace Charles Darwin by Starving the Poor

SNAP! Republicans Embrace Charles Darwin by Starving the Poor

WASHINGTON, D.C.-"It's like a revelation!" said minority whip in the House Kevin McCarthy, of his sudden embrace of Charles Darwin's theory of evolution, which he, like many of his fellow Republicans, had formerly described as "godless liberal pseudo...
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Funny story: Cameltoe water poisoning scandal: government fesses up

Cameltoe water poisoning scandal: government fesses up

Cameltoe, Pornwall - The government is very sorry about stuff that happened back in 1988. A statement issued on the No 10 website says 'Sorry, guys - we f++ked up' and blames Arfer Skagill for the mess. More than 20 tonnes of amphetamine sulpha...
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Funny story: Replica of Clinton's Penis to be displayed in his Presidential Library

Replica of Clinton's Penis to be displayed in his Presidential Library

Responding to worldwide criticism that the William J. Clinton Presidential Library has not immortalized some of the former President's more notable achievements during his tenure in the White House, museum curator Christine Jacobs Mouw announced in a...
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Funny story: Instead of MBAs, Wall St firms will now hire Bullies from Middle Schools

Instead of MBAs, Wall St firms will now hire Bullies from Middle Schools

In a joint press conference held on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange several Wall Street banking and investment firm executives issued a statement about the future direction of talent acquisition in the beleaguered industry. It was made publi...
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Funny story: Tom Brady's Tiddlywinks Mess

Tom Brady's Tiddlywinks Mess

GILLETTE STADIUM, NEXT TO TOM BRADY'S CUP- Tom Brady disparaged Tiddlywinks at his weekly press conference by suggesting football was a real job and a real sport-unlike the age-old game of Tiddlywinks. International gamesters who enjoy Tiddlywinks...
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Funny story: Wife Loses Mind Over Powdered Milk, Witnesses Feel Uneasy As a Result

Wife Loses Mind Over Powdered Milk, Witnesses Feel Uneasy As a Result

Atlantic City, New Jersey - An overzealous housewife, shopping at the local grocery store, lost her mind upon discovering that there were no small containers of powdered milk available and that she would be forced to purchase the family-sized box. "I...
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Funny story: Benefits and drawbacks of E-cigarettes

Benefits and drawbacks of E-cigarettes

With e-cigarette use on the rise, many are wondering whether the battery-operated device is the answer to the dangers posed by traditional burning tobacco. Here's a helpful list of pros and cons to help you consider if e-cigarettes are right for you. PRO • None of the health risks, all of the aesthetic coolness • No longer feel guilty after visiting cancer-stricken uncle in hospital • Might...
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Funny story: President Obama Now Says That He May Enact A Law Banning Bullets

President Obama Now Says That He May Enact A Law Banning Bullets

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama held a White House news conference and he informed the members of the press that he is going to have to show the Republicans that he, Barack Obama, was elected president of the United States and not the nation's pro...
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Funny story: Willie Nelson Denies The Lip Syncing Rumors

Willie Nelson Denies The Lip Syncing Rumors

TUSCALOOSA, Alabama - Willie Nelson performed before a sold out crowd at The Cotton Pickin' Arena. Afterwards he spoke with Buck Yazoo of Yippie-Ki-Yay Magazine in his fancy tour bus. Yazoo asked Willie about the recent rumors that started up i...
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Funny story: Dallas Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones Explains Why He Is Considering Signing Tim Tebow

Dallas Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones Explains Why He Is Considering Signing Tim Tebow

DALLAS - The owner of the Dallas Cowboys, Jerry Jones recently spoke with Rufus Reno of Sports Balls Illustrated Daily at the famed Texas Cattle Stampede House in Arlington. Jones, whose Cowboys are 1-1 told Reno that he has always liked Tim and h...
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Funny story: Cher Suggests That Miley Cyrus Needs To Run To The Nearest Rehab Clinic

Cher Suggests That Miley Cyrus Needs To Run To The Nearest Rehab Clinic

HOLLYWOOD - The music icon Cher was recently asked what she thought about Miley Cyrus' recent prancing, dancing, and twerking in her underwear performance on the MTV Video Music Awards Show. The 67-year-old legend cleared her throat and replied th...
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Funny story: The New York Yankees Plan To Replace Their Pinstriped Uniforms With Pictures of Bats, Balls, and Gloves

The New York Yankees Plan To Replace Their Pinstriped Uniforms With Pictures of Bats, Balls, and Gloves

NEW YORK CITY - Word coming out of YankeeLand is that the 2014 version of the New York Yankees are going to be changing their pinstriped uniforms. Lansing R. Carterfelt a spokesperson for the Yankees organization stated that the Steinbrenner famil...
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Funny story: Kim Jong Un Wants To Buy Denmark's Two Nuclear Weapons

Kim Jong Un Wants To Buy Denmark's Two Nuclear Weapons

PYONGYANG, North Korea - According to North Korea's national news agency, The Rice Paddy, Kim Jong Un has contacted the Danish government and stated that he would like to purchase the two nuclear weapons that they have just developed. The North Ko...
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Funny story: Jim Carrey Is Now The Saddest Man In Tinsel Town

Jim Carrey Is Now The Saddest Man In Tinsel Town

BEVERLY HILLS - Jim Carrey's hair stylist, FuFi Fondue said that he cannot believe how bad America's funnyman is looking. Fondue said that Carrey recently went into his Haven of Hair Salon to get his gray roots colored. While at the salon he sa...
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Funny story: The Cleveland Browns Are Planning On Moving To Omaha

The Cleveland Browns Are Planning On Moving To Omaha

CLEVELAND - The Cleveland Browns have started off the football season with an 0-2 record and already many Browns fans are starting to boo the hometown team. One long time fan, Wolfgang Wallmoney, 61, said that he now knows exactly how General Geor...
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Funny story: Blobfish Elated to Win "Ugliest" Competition

Blobfish Elated to Win "Ugliest" Competition

The results are in. According to an article on the BBC website, the blobfish has earned the unofficial title of "world's ugliest animal." Read the article and see a photo (but not on a full stomach) here. Others have chosen to interview Miss Ame...
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Funny story: Belichick-Fearing Patriots Turn into Fraidy Cats

Belichick-Fearing Patriots Turn into Fraidy Cats

BACK ALLEY/GILLETTE STADIUM - The New England Patriots are running scared. They are also passing scared. Unfortunately, the Pats have everything to fear, including fear itself. The New England team has had a string of bad luck, and a string of bad...
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Funny story: Obama Denies Plan to "Take Out" Conservatives

Obama Denies Plan to "Take Out" Conservatives

Following the President's address to the Business Roundtable in which he blamed a mere handful of fanatical right wing Republicans for obstructing his sensible and practical proposals on a whole range of issues and thus preventing the solution of all...
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