Funny story: Obama names Jim Carrey to head FBI

Obama names Jim Carrey to head FBI

Washington DC - "Fiercely independent and with loads of, uh, intergritty," is how White House aides described the Presidential pick to replace Robert Mueller as FBI chief. "Of course it means his Kick-Ass 2 role as Colonel Stars and Stripes may ha...
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Funny story: A Modest Proposal by the GOP

A Modest Proposal by the GOP

(Modelled after that brilliant proposal of a former era by Dr. Jonathan Swift.) The Husbandry Bill having gone down in Flames in the House of Representatives because it apportioned too much nutrition to the poor of this Great Country, We, the Republican members of this August Body, do hereby put forth a A Modest Proposal For Preventing the Poor People in the United States, from Being a...
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Funny story: The Ten O'Clock Fuckin' News

The Ten O'Clock Fuckin' News

Some people these days seem to have great difficulty speaking without using the "f" word all the time. They seem to think it's cool or makes them look hard rather than it being a complete waste of the excellent English language but I've re-written the news so that one of them can be the BBC newscaster just for once. Good fuckin' evening.This is the Ten o'clock fuckin' news For folks who can't...
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Funny story: Sparks and Mensa launch Adjustable Height Heels

Sparks and Mensa launch Adjustable Height Heels

Sparks and Mensa, the high street department store used by people with more brains than cash, has developed the latest must have trend for women: adjustable height heels. "We've all been there," said product designer Frank Boshell. "Sometimes we n...
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Funny story: Want to know your personality? There's an app for that!

Want to know your personality? There's an app for that!

In the bad old days of psychotherapy, the therapist would feel the skull and determine a personality from the various bumps and ridges over the cranium. "The theory," said Mac Buck, editor of App World! magazine, "is that the brain's various cont...
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Funny story: Andy Roddick turns down $1 million Wimbledon TV commentator post

Andy Roddick turns down $1 million Wimbledon TV commentator post

Lake Austin, Texas - "Andy just has too many balls up in the air right now," a PR for the Andy Roddick Foundation revealed, "to sweat it out in a cramped commentators' box for two whole weeks alongside shock-jocks Boris Becker, John McEnroe and Tim H...
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Funny story: NSA Scandal Frees Local Spinster From Mental Hospital

NSA Scandal Frees Local Spinster From Mental Hospital

Philadelphia, PA-- Recent revelations about spying by the NSA (Nazi Scum Agency) has lead to the release of a local woman from the mental hospital. Miss Vicky Smegma was institutionalized in 2009 after she told her doctor the government was spying o...
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Funny story: Paula Deen Blows Off Today Show Interview To Drink Malt Liquor and Apply For Food Stamps

Paula Deen Blows Off Today Show Interview To Drink Malt Liquor and Apply For Food Stamps

Fresh from admitting that she routinely referred to African-Americans as "n-words", Food Network Fry-cook Paula Deen acted like one this morning when the celebrity porker completely blew off a Today Show interview-- and the show's all-white cast is...
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Funny story: Britney Spears Confesses A Secret Crush and An Intimate Tattoo

Britney Spears Confesses A Secret Crush and An Intimate Tattoo

VENICE BEACH - Britney Spears paid a visit to the world famous Bong Bong Tattoo Parlor. She spoke with the owner Bong Bong and asked about getting a certain tattoo, removed from the most intimate part of her entire body. Bong Bong smiled and to...
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Funny story: A Very Pregnant Jessica Simpson Reveals Her Amazing Cravings

A Very Pregnant Jessica Simpson Reveals Her Amazing Cravings

LOS ANGELES - Jessica Simpson says that she has just about gotten used to being habitually pregnant. She told Celebrity Globe's Pia Confetti that she doesn't know how OctoMom AKA Nadya Suleman could possibly have had 14 kids. Simpson, who is 32...
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Funny story: Nevada Bans Chewing Gum

Nevada Bans Chewing Gum

CARSON CITY, Nevada - The Nevada State Senate acting on a request of the vast majority of the Las Vegas Gambling casinos has just voted on a bill regarding the chewing of chewing gum. State Senator Hula Hanna Dimpsydew, 46, [D-Reno] stated that th...
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Funny story: Charlie Sheen Admits He'd Like To Do The Hokey Pokey With Katie Holmes

Charlie Sheen Admits He'd Like To Do The Hokey Pokey With Katie Holmes

SHERMAN OAKS - Charlie Sheen recently told Larry King on The Viagra View that he has probably been with more women than Hugh Hefner himself. King smiled, took a sip from his bottle of Geritol, and replied that he has no doubt about that. He ask...
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Funny story: Kathie Lee Gifford Denies She's Pregnant With Regis Philbin's Twins

Kathie Lee Gifford Denies She's Pregnant With Regis Philbin's Twins

NEW YORK CITY - Kathie Lee Gifford has admitted that she still has a special place in her heart for her former Live With Regis & Kathie Lee host Regis Philbin. But the 59-year-old wife of ex-New York Giants player and NFL commentator Frank Gif...
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