Funny story: The Epic of Gilgamesh

The Epic of Gilgamesh

The Epic of Gilgamesh is a long, boring, heroic poem by Gil Gamesh, a Babylonian who plagiarized the story from ancient Sumerian sources and claimed that the events of the poem, outlandish though they are, actually happened to him. One of the poem's key episodes in the flood, which, when it is written about in the Bible, is known as the Biblical flood, but, in Gilgamesh, is referred to as The Delu...
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Funny story: Ray, the Millenarian: A Dark and Sordid Tale of the 1990s Middle West in Thirteen Chapters

Ray, the Millenarian: A Dark and Sordid Tale of the 1990s Middle West in Thirteen Chapters

Chapter 1 It was a dark and stormy decade. The millennium, looming ahead, was frequently pre-empted on TV by Highway to Heaven, Touched by an Angel, and The Jerry Springer Show. Ray Sneed, a millenarian, mowed his lawn. He inhabits a quiet, suburban pod, has deep aspirations. Clipping his bushes, he sees the signs--envisions the Great Battle before him. And bides his time. Cl...
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Funny story: Corporate C.E.O.s Organize for More Pay

Corporate C.E.O.s Organize for More Pay

Ever since President Ronald Reagan busted the air-traffic controllers' union, organized labor has been on the decline. Now, that trend has begun to change with the formation of the 'Fortune 500 Executive Leader's Union'. The fledgling union has a...
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Funny story: Shaquille O'Neal Begs For More Endorsement Opportunities

Shaquille O'Neal Begs For More Endorsement Opportunities

Retired basketball superstar Shaquille O'Neal is literally begging for additional endorsement opportunities, according to Shaq himself. Mr. O'Neal implored, "Give me more stuff that I don't, won't, or can't possibly use to sell to people, PLEASE...
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Funny story: Nicolas Cage To Replace Ben Bernanke as Fed Chair

Nicolas Cage To Replace Ben Bernanke as Fed Chair

President Obama is expected to announce actor Nicolas Cage as the new chairman of the Federal Reserve System later today in Washington. Current Fed chairman Ben Bernanke is stepping down, and will likely accept a lucrative position with one of the...
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Funny story: UK archives reveal Queen Elizabeth wanted to nuke Kent and Essex

UK archives reveal Queen Elizabeth wanted to nuke Kent and Essex

London - Government documents released under the 30 Year Rule show Queen Elizabeth plotted to detonate a nuclear bomb in the event of being outed as a KGB impostor. Targets included the Duke of Kent and the Earl of Essex, described by NATO intelli...
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Funny story: A-Rod in talks to take Performance Unenhancing Drugs (PUDs)

A-Rod in talks to take Performance Unenhancing Drugs (PUDs)

NEW YORK - Alex Rodriguez is negotiating a deal with Major League Baseball that would allow him to reverse a lifetime ban for his role in taking performance-enhancing drugs by switching to Performance Unenhancing drugs (PUDs). PUDs are delivered r...
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Funny story: Anthony Weiner Asked By Donald Trump To Appear On Celebrity Apprentice

Anthony Weiner Asked By Donald Trump To Appear On Celebrity Apprentice

NEW YORK CITY - Donald Trump may have the worst hairdo this side of Gary Busey but he does know all about getting television ratings. The producer and star of Celebrity Apprentice has just stated that he has asked Anthony Weiner to appear on the s...
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Funny story: Paris Hilton To Star In TV Beach Show 'Baywatch Blue.'

Paris Hilton To Star In TV Beach Show 'Baywatch Blue.'

HOLLYWOOD - Paris "I'm Hot" Hilton has just announced that she has agreed to star in her very own television beach-police show Baywatch Blue. Paris met with Vodka Vermicelli of iRumors at Le Loins of Joan of Arc French Restaurant in Beverly Hills.
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Funny story: Anthony Weiner Dejected and Depressed Says He May Just Say The Heck With It And Move To Africa

Anthony Weiner Dejected and Depressed Says He May Just Say The Heck With It And Move To Africa

MANHATTAN - Anthony Weiner says that he feels like he has been run through the ringer. Speaking with Savannah Bamboo of Political Salad Bar Magazine, the man who wants to be the next mayor of New York City said that all of the late night talk show...
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Funny story: Dallas Cowboys Quarterback Tony Romo Makes A Promise To The Cowboy Fans

Dallas Cowboys Quarterback Tony Romo Makes A Promise To The Cowboy Fans

DALLAS - The Dallas Cowboys open their pre-season against the Miami Dolphins in what is known as The Hall of Fame game on Sunday night. Last year many Cowboy fans were unhappy with the performance of the team and especially with quarterback Tony R...
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Funny story: Monica Lewinsky Admits That She Has A Crush On Anthony Weiner

Monica Lewinsky Admits That She Has A Crush On Anthony Weiner

SAN FRANCISCO - It appears that the most famous White House intern in the history of White House interns is back in the news. The infamous Monica Lewinsky recently confided to a very close friend, over drinks at The 49ers Huddle Bar, that she find...
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Funny story: Russia To Rename Moscow's Sheremetyevo Airport The Comrade Edward Snowden Commemorative Airport

Russia To Rename Moscow's Sheremetyevo Airport The Comrade Edward Snowden Commemorative Airport

NEW YORK CITY - National Focus Magazine is reporting that Edward Snowden has suddenly become one of the most popular non-Russian individuals in the entire country of Russia. Snowden, who is the star of the notorious NSA Scandal, spoke with a repor...
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Funny story: Ke$ha May Have To Drop The $ Sign From Her Name

Ke$ha May Have To Drop The $ Sign From Her Name

LA HABRA, California - Things have not been going to good lately for the quasi-rap singer Ke$ha. She recently performed in the parking lot of a Pompous Pizza Parlor in La Habra before a crowd of 31 people. The singer with the dollar sign in her na...
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Funny story: The Weiner Action Figure Dolls Are All Being Recalled

The Weiner Action Figure Dolls Are All Being Recalled

CHICAGO - The Hasbroken Toy Company has just issued an immediate recall on all of the Anthony Weiner Action Figure Dolls. According to company spokesperson Zandreeka LaSheena Lovecake the dolls were shipped out minus the pants. Miss Lovecake state...
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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan Is Finally Out of Rehab

Lindsay Lohan Is Finally Out of Rehab

LOS ANGELES - The staff and patients at The Cliffside Manor Rehab Clinic in Los Angeles were thrilled to see Lindsay "The Whiner" Lohan finally leave the facility. Lohan had originally been placed at The Henry & Betty Ford Rehab Clinic but the...
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Funny story: Edward Snowden To Stay In Russia and Become The Government's Director of Computers

Edward Snowden To Stay In Russia and Become The Government's Director of Computers

NEW YORK CITY - American Spotlight Magazine has learned that NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden has been granted Russian asylum. The computer info leaker was all smiles according to Russia's national news agency Vodkavich which noted that Snowden is...
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Funny story: John Travolta and Adam Lambert To Star In The TV Sit-Com 'One Of Us Is Gay'

John Travolta and Adam Lambert To Star In The TV Sit-Com 'One Of Us Is Gay'

HOLLYWOOD - The Epitome Television Network has just announced that they will be premiering a new sit-com in the fall called One of Us Is Gay starring John Travolta and Adam Lambert. ETN spokesperson Tansinella "Tansi" Wickovich stated that the sho...
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Funny story: Weiner Jokes Have Just Set A U.S. Record

Weiner Jokes Have Just Set A U.S. Record

CHICAGO - The Amalgamated Data Gathering Agency which is based in the Windy City has just confirmed that Anthony Weiner jokes have just broke the United States record for sheer number of jokes. ADGA spokesperson Bagby B. Buckleybox stated that not...
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Funny story: Lifetime bans in professional sports

Lifetime bans in professional sports

Major League Baseball is reportedly considering hitting Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez with a lifetime ban for steroid use. Let's look at some other famous examples of lifetime bans in sports. 434 B.C.: Hypatius of Rhodes is banned from competing in the Olympics after failing to disclose to officials that he is descended from Zeus. 1874: After he is discovered cheating, Pete McGraw is...
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