There were 478 spoof news stories published in August 2013. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.

Funny story: The GOP to Split into Three

The GOP to Split into Three

At a strategy meeting in Boston by the Republican National Committee last week, Reince Preibus, the RNC Chairman, announced that the GOP, in acknowledging the political reality facing the splintered party, will split into three. The Republican brand...
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Funny story: A Delaware Woman Arrested For Flying A Drone Over The White House

A Delaware Woman Arrested For Flying A Drone Over The White House

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Kay Duffgrumble, 62, of Smyrna, Delaware went to Washington, D.C. to check out the various landmarks and she ended up in a heap of trouble as they say down in Mississippi. Mrs. Duffgrumble, who was divorced in March of this year...
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Funny story: NYPD swaps 'Stop & Frisk' for 'Cop A Ride'

NYPD swaps 'Stop & Frisk' for 'Cop A Ride'

New York -- With a Federal judge challenging the constitutionality of its "Stop & Frisk" initiatives, the New York Police Department is trading its racially profiled patdowns for a more aggressive game plan. Called "Cop A Ride," the new campa...
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Funny story: Iowa May Legalize Marijuana

Iowa May Legalize Marijuana

DES MOINES - The state of Iowa is seriously considering the legalization of marijuana, or pot as Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus, and Willie Nelson refer to it. A state senator who did not want his name revealed for safety reasons stated that it is no...
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Funny story: Chicharito Disappointed That Girfriend Cheryl Cole Did Not Get The X-Factor Judges Job

Chicharito Disappointed That Girfriend Cheryl Cole Did Not Get The X-Factor Judges Job

NEW YORK CITY - Soccer star Javier Hernández Balcázar, who is known as Chicharito, flew to New York City to shoot a commercial for Aye Caramba Beer. While in the Big Apple he was interviewed by Rufus Reno with Sports Balls Illustrated Daily. Re...
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Funny story: 'Whitey' Bulger a cult hero in Ecuador as court convicts on racketeering charges

'Whitey' Bulger a cult hero in Ecuador as court convicts on racketeering charges

Boston - The Ecuadorean epicenter of corruption and racketeering has commissioned a 50ft bronze statue of James 'Whitey' Bulger who was found guilty of 32 counts of mobster stuff by a Boston jury today. Captured after 18 years on the run in Santa...
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Funny story: Riots Hit Paris as France Bans English Pop Music

Riots Hit Paris as France Bans English Pop Music

In recent years it seems that the august body l'Académie française which regulates the French language by approving new words and grammar is there just to prevent the French populace from communicating with the rest of the world, which speaks English...
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Funny story: Al Qaeda Offers To Lend Detroit $7 Billion

Al Qaeda Offers To Lend Detroit $7 Billion

DETROIT - The mayor of the bankrupt city of Detroit Dave Bing has just informed the news media that he has received a letter from the Al Qaeda organization headquartered in Pakistan. The mayor went on to say that the letter was written by a Mr. Ba...
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Funny story: Syria cheating with steroids, say UN inspectors

Syria cheating with steroids, say UN inspectors

Damascus -- The chemical warfare situation in Syria took an unexpected turn yesterday, when a team of UN inspectors discovered that the war-torn nation is using steroids and other Performance Enhancing Drugs (PEDs) to fortify its army. "Clearly,...
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Funny story: A-Rod To Open A Chain Of Cheating Clinics

A-Rod To Open A Chain Of Cheating Clinics

Trenton, New Jersey -- Alex Rodriguez plans to put his experience as a professional cheater to work. He announced today the creation of Cheat America, a national network of storefront clinics, providing products and services that help cheaters prospe...
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Funny story: Tom Brady's Wife Gisele Bundchen Says Tim Tebow Is A Welcome Addition To The New England Patriots

Tom Brady's Wife Gisele Bundchen Says Tim Tebow Is A Welcome Addition To The New England Patriots

BOSTON - Coach Bill Belichick saw something in former New York Jets quarterback Tim Tebow and he has no doubt that Tim will come through for the New England Patriots. As everyone in the NFL knows there is no player who is more dedicated and devote...
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Funny story: Mossad joins Indian NCIS probe into Mumbai submarine blast

Mossad joins Indian NCIS probe into Mumbai submarine blast

Mumbai - Banned on Vladimir Putin's orders from meddling - uh...contributing! - in an investigation into the sudden, unexplained destruction of Russia's flagship submarine the Kursk in August 2000 Mossad's forensic naval intelligence team has arrived...
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Funny story: School District Hires Porn Stars to Teach Sex Ed Classes

School District Hires Porn Stars to Teach Sex Ed Classes

(Corry, PA) - In what will be known as one of the most progressive decisions in academic history, the members of the Corry Area School District of Erie County Pennsylvania have voted to allow porn stars, Raven Gavina and Brock Lancer, to join their f...
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Funny story: Remains of Dolomites Mastiff discovered in 'Mona Lisa' tomb

Remains of Dolomites Mastiff discovered in 'Mona Lisa' tomb

Florence, Italy - "Whoever this woman was she was a dog alright," pit digger Guido Mortadella at the Martyr's Crypt at the Church of Santissima Annunziata told reporters today as news of the forensic breakthrough went viral. Weeks of painstaking e...
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Funny story: A 16-Year-Old Shreveport, Louisiana High School Pitcher's Fastball Is Clocked at 109 MPH!

A 16-Year-Old Shreveport, Louisiana High School Pitcher's Fastball Is Clocked at 109 MPH!

SHREVEPORT, Louisiana - A student at Stonewall Jackson High School in Shreveport is getting some nationwide notoriety. Corey Buttonbox, a 16-year-old sophomore who plays for the Stonewall Jackson Gators, has had his fastball repeatedly clocked at...
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Funny story: Boehner Steps Down as House Majority Leader; Appoints Wife's Toy Poodle in His Stead

Boehner Steps Down as House Majority Leader; Appoints Wife's Toy Poodle in His Stead

WASHINGTON, D.C.--After tweeting, "Fuck it! My wife's toy poodle could get more done with these guys than I can!", the besieged Speaker of the House stepped down on Friday to allow his wife's toy poodle, Knuckles, to take over as Majority Leader.
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Funny story: Edward Snowden Verifies That He Is Dating Vladimir Putin's Niece

Edward Snowden Verifies That He Is Dating Vladimir Putin's Niece

NEW YORK CITY - American NSA whistleblower and now resident of Russia, Edward Snowden stated to Russia's national news agency, Vodkavich that he is thrilled with having been granted asylum in Russia. He also added that he loves his new job as dire...
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Funny story: Saddam Hussain Ghost Ride the top attraction in Zimbabwe's forthcoming 'Disneyland in Africa'

Saddam Hussain Ghost Ride the top attraction in Zimbabwe's forthcoming 'Disneyland in Africa'

Africa - A hologram of Saddam plunging headlong over Victoria Falls inside a barrel of sweet light crude is one of President Robert Mugabe's personal favorites to top the bill in Zimbabwe's forthcoming US$300m theme park. The project sees hundreds...
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Funny story: Man Finds Lettuce From 1987 In His Refrigerator

Man Finds Lettuce From 1987 In His Refrigerator

Philadelphia, PA-- A local man is in the hospital tonight after eating something very old from the back of his refrigerator. Eddie Spaghetti apparently ate some lettuce that was purchased all the way back in 1987. The awful meal landed him in the IC...
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Funny story: A-Rod's Agent, PR Firm Suggest Pretending He's Gay-Rod As Next Career Move

A-Rod's Agent, PR Firm Suggest Pretending He's Gay-Rod As Next Career Move

Worried about their client's future marketability, Alex Rodridguez's agent and public relations firm are telling the baseball star to pretend he's gay and come out to the sports world. Future endorsement deals with gay cruise lines, Antique World Ma...
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Funny story: The Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Are Told By Owner Jerry Jones That They Better Watch Their Figures

The Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Are Told By Owner Jerry Jones That They Better Watch Their Figures

DALLAS - The man who owns the Dallas Cowboys has informed the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders that he will not put up with any muffin tops, untoned thighs, or non-nubile breasts. Jones met with all of the cheerleaders in the conference room of an Ench...
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Funny story: Rihanna Debuts Her New 'Mouthy' Toy

Rihanna Debuts Her New 'Mouthy' Toy

DETROIT - Rihanna told the audience at The Carburetor Coliseum that she had a surprise for them. And then she opened her mouth wide open and flashed her teeth. And right away the venue filled with a chorus of widespread oohs and aahs as they could...
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Funny story: Tom Cruise and Heidi Montag's Romantic Rendezvous In Redondo Beach

Tom Cruise and Heidi Montag's Romantic Rendezvous In Redondo Beach

REDONDO BEACH - Tom Cruise recently stated that at times he really misses his ex-wife Katie Holmes. The Mission Impossible star told Bedroom Pillow Talk that if there was any chance at all of him getting back together with Katie he would jump at i...
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Funny story: U.S. Border Patrol Agents Discover An Amazing Tunnel That Leads From Mexico To Nevada

U.S. Border Patrol Agents Discover An Amazing Tunnel That Leads From Mexico To Nevada

NOGALES, Arizona - The United States Border Patrol has just discovered what they are calling the longest and most elaborate tunnel in the history of U.S. - Mexico tunnels. Border Patrol spokesperson Grady G. Strongmarble, 43, informed the news med...
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Funny story: Sofia Vergara Insures Her Breasts For $2 Million Each

Sofia Vergara Insures Her Breasts For $2 Million Each

HOLLYWOOD - Several entertainment publications have noted that the most popular pair of Tinsel Town breasts belong to the star of Modern Family, Sofia Vergara. The Colombian bombshell just turned 41, in July and she has already been named the Most...
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Funny story: LAPD teletype gets message from Australia

LAPD teletype gets message from Australia

LAPD Communications Division workers in the Teletype department today got a shock when an unused teletype started printing 'WRU' - the code for 'Who and Where are you?' They traced the line back to Queensland, Australia, but not before the teletyp...
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Funny story: California Bans The Rhythm Birth Control Method

California Bans The Rhythm Birth Control Method

SACRAMENTO - Recent census numbers show that the state of California is fast approaching the 40 million population mark. According to The Amalgamated Data Gathering Agency if the population number continues to increase at the present rate Californ...
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Funny story: President Obama Confesses That His Favorite Reality TV Show Is The Real Housewives of Intercourse, Pennsylvania

President Obama Confesses That His Favorite Reality TV Show Is The Real Housewives of Intercourse, Pennsylvania

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama recently invited a group of television writers and reporters to the White House to talk about the state of modern day television shows and programming. The president expressed to them that he would like to see a...
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Funny story: Razor Manufacturers Ask Hipster Men To Consider Shaving Legs

Razor Manufacturers Ask Hipster Men To Consider Shaving Legs

Facing declining sales of their razor blades and shaving creams, the United Razor Association & Shaving Systems (URASS) has begun a series of print and televised ads to convince a new generation of men to shave their legs and underarms. "Male...
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Funny story: Pamela Anderson Concerned About Her Dwindling Sex Hormones

Pamela Anderson Concerned About Her Dwindling Sex Hormones

SAN FRANCISCO - Pamela Anderson flew into San Francisco to film a commercial for The Silly Sardine Seafood Restaurant. While in the City By The Bay she attended a concert by Camel Carl & The Desert Rag Headz. Afterwards she spoke with Gazeb...
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Funny story: Carmen Electra Reveals Why She Broke Up With Simon Cowell

Carmen Electra Reveals Why She Broke Up With Simon Cowell

EL SEGUNDO, California - Carmen Electra had just finished her dinner at The Fiery Tongue of The Dragon Diner when she was approached by Vodka Vermicelli with iRumors. Miss Electra was asked about the situation that her ex-boyfriend Simon Cowell no...
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Funny story: "Show Who Is Boss" - Democrats Urge Obama to Nuke Syria

"Show Who Is Boss" - Democrats Urge Obama to Nuke Syria

WASHINGTON DC - After being hassled over "leading from behind" and trivial matters like having an ambassador murdered as an embassy burned to the ground, Democrats want President Obama to "step up" and command the respect that he deserves. In simple...
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Funny story: New York Mets put the entire team on the Disabled List

New York Mets put the entire team on the Disabled List

Flushing, New York -- With their superstar pitcher going down with a serious elbow ailment, the New York Mets have placed every one of its players on the 365 day Disabled List, essentially shutting down the team until further notice. General mana...
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Funny story: White Russian Zombies in Singapore Sling Pink Squirrels While Bahama Mama Has Screaming Orgasm After Sex On The Beach During Hurricane Relief Effort

White Russian Zombies in Singapore Sling Pink Squirrels While Bahama Mama Has Screaming Orgasm After Sex On The Beach During Hurricane Relief Effort

SINGAPORE - A bizarre chain of events after Hurricane Vamei resulted in the arrest of two white Russian zombies and one Afro-Bahamian prostitute. Following the devastation of the Singapore Coast by Hurricane Vamei, the President of Russia, Vladami...
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Funny story: Kate Gosselin's Shocking Secret

Kate Gosselin's Shocking Secret

READING, Pennsylvania - Kate Gosselin's nanny has stated that lately Kate has really been down about the fact that in the span of a few short years she has seen one reality show get cancelled (Jon and Kate Plus 8), her marriage to Jon Gosselin dissol...
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Funny story: Vatican: New Communion Wafers To Contain 3 More Grams Of Whole Grain

Vatican: New Communion Wafers To Contain 3 More Grams Of Whole Grain

VATICAN CITY-Catholics around the world will enjoy more whole grain in their communion wafers come this fall. Today the Vatican announced that they've re-formulated their recipe for their Eucharistic hosts to include a whopping 3 more grams of whole...
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Funny story: Pentagon rubbishes reports that 5-star NATO general is slumming it in grace 'n' favor White House mansion

Pentagon rubbishes reports that 5-star NATO general is slumming it in grace 'n' favor White House mansion

Washington AC/DC - "Uh, this sort of thing just doesn't go on in the United States," a Pentagon internal affairs spokesperson said this weekend as news of security raids across the Capital broke. First up a 6am sweep of the Presidential potting sh...
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Funny story: Taylor Swift Is Thinking About Writing A Song That Isn't About An Ex-Boyfriend

Taylor Swift Is Thinking About Writing A Song That Isn't About An Ex-Boyfriend

CHATTANOOGA, Tennessee - Taylor Swift was in town visiting a relative when she was approached by a writer for Music Moments Magazine. The writer Calcutta Cotton asked Taylor if she had gotten over her praying mantis bite that she had received whil...
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Funny story: Ku Klux Klan Changes Mind About Ted Nugent

Ku Klux Klan Changes Mind About Ted Nugent

Waco Texas - The Grand Dragon of the local branch of the Ku Klux Klan announced at a press conference today that they have reluctantly decided not to offer an honorary membership to Ted Nugent. "Ted certainly has the right mindset to be one of...
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Funny story: Kelly Clarkson Explains Why She Turned Down Dancing With The Stars

Kelly Clarkson Explains Why She Turned Down Dancing With The Stars

HOLLYWOOD - Dancing With The Stars is currently looking for celebrities to appear on the next edition of the hit dance show. Sangria Wine with TV ClickerWorld spoke with DWTS host Tom Bergeron and asked if the rumor that Kelly Clarkson would be a...
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Funny story: Suicide bombers breastfeeding their babies liquid semtex

Suicide bombers breastfeeding their babies liquid semtex

Virginia - The CIA has backed British reports claiming explosive breasts implants are threatening global security after pictures of foreign women's flame-thrower nipple-guards and related maternity bra stuff were posted on the YouBoob! network. Ag...
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Funny story: Madonna's Devastating Rejection

Madonna's Devastating Rejection

NEW YORK CITY - Madonna, who at one time was one of the top singers in the music business, is beginning to hear the footsteps of reality creeping up on her. Music Moments Magazine noted that the woman who was born Madonna Louise Ciccone at one tim...
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Funny story: Chelsea Handler Comments That She Is Tougher Than Justin Bieber

Chelsea Handler Comments That She Is Tougher Than Justin Bieber

NEW YORK CITY - Chelsea Handler flew to the Big Apple to visit an old high school friend who lives in Manhattan. As the two walked in Central Park, Chelsea was approached by a reporter with Celebrity Globe Magazine. The reporter Pia Confetti as...
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Funny story: Florida's Plans For A George Zimmerman Theme Park Fall Through

Florida's Plans For A George Zimmerman Theme Park Fall Through

TALLAHASSEE, Florida - National Focus Magazine is reporting that the heated issue of a George Zimmerman Theme Park has caused quite a hoopla in the Plywood State of Florida. State Senator Claxton F. Malagueña [D-Fort Walton Beach] spearheaded a dr...
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Funny story: Leah Remini Reports Threats From The Church of The Scientific Method

Leah Remini Reports Threats From The Church of The Scientific Method

BEVERLY HILLS - Leah Remini, who starred in the hit comedy show King of Queens with Kevin James, has reported a rash of threats from her former church. Remini said that she quit the Church of The Scientific Method because she got tired of having t...
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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan Is Finally Out of Rehab

Lindsay Lohan Is Finally Out of Rehab

LOS ANGELES - The staff and patients at The Cliffside Manor Rehab Clinic in Los Angeles were thrilled to see Lindsay "The Whiner" Lohan finally leave the facility. Lohan had originally been placed at The Henry & Betty Ford Rehab Clinic but the...
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Funny story: GOP accidentally repeals their own laws

GOP accidentally repeals their own laws

After John Boehner said that Congress "ought to be judged on how many laws that we repeal", fellow Republicans went wild writing bills to strike down existing laws. Some were overzealous and others were confused. After a few hours, GOP members had r...
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Funny story: Employees at Yemen Government Tourism Agency Nervous About Sudden Layoff Rumors

Employees at Yemen Government Tourism Agency Nervous About Sudden Layoff Rumors

Workers at the Sana'a office of the Yemen Government Tourism Agency were surprised today by rampant rumors of layoffs. "Nothing has prepared us for this sudden change of plans," explained Hasna from behind the reception desk. "We had just start...
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Funny story: Khloe Kardashian Says Kanye West Has Insulted The Kardashian Family

Khloe Kardashian Says Kanye West Has Insulted The Kardashian Family

LOS ANGELES - One thing that can be said about the Kardashian (Klan) is that they are not the least bit shy about speaking up about anything and everything. Khloe recently appeared on The Viagra View and she told co-hosts Larry King and Regis Phil...
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Funny story: Nina Dobrev Agrees To Appear In A Nude Vampire-Themed Calendar For 2014

Nina Dobrev Agrees To Appear In A Nude Vampire-Themed Calendar For 2014

NEW ORLEANS - Nina Dobrev, the star of the hit cable show The Vampire Diaries, flew down to New Orleans to check out some sights for an upcoming nude calendar. Dobrev told Fajita San Guacamole with Hollywood Innuendo that she had been offered to a...
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Funny story: US spy industry disguises intelligence with stupidity

US spy industry disguises intelligence with stupidity

Washington, DC -- From dropping the ball on 9/11 to identifying non-existent weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, America's intelligence industry seems forever to be on the losing side. The most recent publicly documented failure: allowing a freel...
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Funny story: Maria Sharapova Warned By The U.S. Tennis Board To Tone Down Her Loud Grunting

Maria Sharapova Warned By The U.S. Tennis Board To Tone Down Her Loud Grunting

CHICAGO - Acting on numerous complaints from tennis fans as well as fellow tennis players, the U.S. Tennis Board has issued a warning to tennis pro Maria Sharapova. The USTB has ruled that Miss Sharapova must tone down her extremely loud grunting...
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Funny story: A 53-Year-Old Woman In West Virginia Bench Presses 800 Pounds!

A 53-Year-Old Woman In West Virginia Bench Presses 800 Pounds!

VIENNA, West Virginia - The Guinness Book of World Records is reporting that a woman in West Virginia named Polly Ester Calypso has just bench pressed an amazing 800 pounds setting the weight lifting record for women. Mrs. Calypso, who was divorce...
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Funny story: Mike Tyson Jumps Into New York City Mayoral Race

Mike Tyson Jumps Into New York City Mayoral Race

NEW YORK, NY - Shortly after being named "Power Player of the Week" by Fox News's Mike Wallace, Mike Tyson announced that he will be jumping into the New York City Mayoral Race. Asked about Anthony Weiner's trials and tribulations, Mr. Tyson state...
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Funny story: A 97-Year-Old Oklahoma Woman Gives Birth To Twins

A 97-Year-Old Oklahoma Woman Gives Birth To Twins

CHICKASHA, Oklahoma - Reports coming out of the Sooner state are that a 97-year-old woman identified as Maggie Sue Mistbush has just given birth to twin boys. Mrs. Mistbush is resting comfortably at The Chickasha General Hospital and her two baby...
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Funny story: Weiner Caught Stuffing His Package into Women's Boxes While They Slept

Weiner Caught Stuffing His Package into Women's Boxes While They Slept

NEW YORK, NY - Mayoral hopeful, Anthony Weiner, was caught stuffing his package into mail boxes. When asked, Weiner said that "as long as you don't stick the package in all the way, it's OK." Anthony Weiner, walking the streets in Queens NY yester...
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Funny story: Diet book causes crime spree in Nordic country

Diet book causes crime spree in Nordic country

Norway's standing as a peaceful and low crime country, has taken a severe hit after a new diet crazes has hit the country. The book "steel what you eat" has been on the bestseller list for two months and the effects can be felt in the otherwise q...
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Funny story: Oprah Buys Every Swiss Army Knife For Sale in Zurich To Make A Point

Oprah Buys Every Swiss Army Knife For Sale in Zurich To Make A Point

Oprah Winfrey wants everyone in Switzerland to know she can buy stuff. Following an embarrassing and possibly racist incident at an exclusive handbag boutique, the Queen of Talk has decided to buy every Swiss Army knife for sale in the city of Zuric...
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Funny story: Ellen DeGeneres Denies The Sex Change Rumors

Ellen DeGeneres Denies The Sex Change Rumors

BEVERLY HILLS - Talk show host Ellen DeGeneres told the entertainment media that she has no idea where in the world the rumor of her having sexual reassignment surgery started. The blonde, blue-eyed comedian, who is married to Portia DeGeneres, sa...
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Funny story: Los Angeles Mandates That All Homeless Signs Must Now Be In English and In Spanish

Los Angeles Mandates That All Homeless Signs Must Now Be In English and In Spanish

LOS ANGELES - Caving in to strong public opinion Los Angeles Mayor Eric Garcetti has just issue a Mayoral Directive that he says will go into effect at 12:03 a.m. on Thursday, August 22. Mayor Garcetti informed the news media that after receiving...
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Funny story: All that 'Yum, broccoli!' talk making President Obama gung-ho about Syria

All that 'Yum, broccoli!' talk making President Obama gung-ho about Syria

Washington - An unexpected appetizer of the President's favorite dish turned up ahead of Obama's chicken gung-po tonight as he dined alone with Vice President Biden. "Mmm, steamed Broccoli a la Raisa Gorbachev," the Veep exclaimed recalling how th...
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Funny story: Willie Nelson May Be Moving To Colorado

Willie Nelson May Be Moving To Colorado

AUSTIN - Country music icon Willie Nelson recently talked to Buck Yazoo with Yippie-Ki-Yay Magazine at The Davy Crockett Barbecue Grill located in the capital of the Third Coast, Austin, Texas. Yazoo asked Willie how he keeps up the concert tourin...
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Funny story: Jobless rat hits another record

Jobless rat hits another record

An unemployed rat has again caused damage in BBC Radio Gateshead's studio. DJ Ike Anspinnem was getting ready to play an old record by the BoomTown Rats when the jobless rat leapt on to the turn-table and hit the record with its front paws and hea...
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Funny story: Toothpaste Squeezed From Top Of Tube 'Drama'

Toothpaste Squeezed From Top Of Tube 'Drama'

Police in Wiltshire are investigating an allegation that a member of the public squeezed a tube of toothpaste from the top of a tube instead of from the bottom, leaving an unsightly bendy bit in the middle of the tube, and lashings of toothpaste stil...
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Funny story: George Clooney and Sandra Bullock Lock Lips At Lake Como

George Clooney and Sandra Bullock Lock Lips At Lake Como

NEW YORK CITY - The word filtering out of Italy is that George Clooney and Sandra Bullock have become quite close on their movie promotion trip to Italy. Clooney and Bullock traveled to Venice to promote their latest movie Gravity. But as local...
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Funny story: Talking Robot Launched Into Space Yaks Up A Storm

Talking Robot Launched Into Space Yaks Up A Storm

In theory it sounded great. Build a talking robot (name = Kirobo) to keep a Japanese astronaut company on the International Space Station. Read about it here on BBC News . But onlookers aren't sure things will work out as planned. The problem? K...
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Funny story: Louisiana Considering a Ban on Cruise Ships

Louisiana Considering a Ban on Cruise Ships

NEW ORLEANS - The state of Louisiana is considering a major change in their cruise line policy. Mildred "Millie" Scatterbrick, 46, director of tourism for the Bayou State stated to reporters that in the past two years the cruise line companies hav...
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Funny story: North Carolina awaits first slave ship in 150 years!

North Carolina awaits first slave ship in 150 years!

Both houses of the North Carolina state legislature voted today to secede from the union and at the same time designated the state a Plantation. The bill which passed with large majorities in both houses appointed the current governor Plantation Over...
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Funny story: Japanese Volcano Mount Sakurajima Erupts For The 500th Time This Year

Japanese Volcano Mount Sakurajima Erupts For The 500th Time This Year

KAGOSHIMA CITY, Japan - The Saki News Agency of Japan has just announced that Mount Sakurajima has just had eruption number 500 since the first of the year. A reporter with Saki stated that the volcano is one of the most ominous ones in the entire...
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Funny story: Jessica Simpson Is Talking Divorce

Jessica Simpson Is Talking Divorce

LOS ANGELES - The latest starlet to mention the dreaded "D" word is Jessica Simpson, who was a big hit as Daisy Duke in the 2005 movie The Dukes of Hazzard. Simpson, who recently had her second child from fiancé Eric Johnson, spoke to Fajita San G...
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Funny story: An 8-Year-Old School Boy Finds A Top Secret CIA Document at A Dairy Queen In Queens

An 8-Year-Old School Boy Finds A Top Secret CIA Document at A Dairy Queen In Queens

QUEENS, New York - Little 8-year-old Howie Buttonbitty has always said that he is very lucky at finding things. When he was just 5-years-old he found an old Civil War cavalry sword that had belonged to Confederate General Stonewall Jackson. An...
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Funny story: Las Vegas Studies Show That Alcohol Is The Number One Cause of Marriages

Las Vegas Studies Show That Alcohol Is The Number One Cause of Marriages

LAS VEGAS - Research studies conducted by Chicago's Amalgamated Data Gathering Agency have shown an interesting trend regarding alcohol and marriages in Las Vegas. ADGA Spokesperson Bagby B. Buckleybox explained that after conducting a nine-month...
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Funny story: Heidi Fleiss: From Hollywood Madam To Pahrump Pot Princess

Heidi Fleiss: From Hollywood Madam To Pahrump Pot Princess

PAHRUMP, Nevada - The notorious Heidi Fleiss is back in the news and this time it is not for money laundering. The woman who became internationally known has gone from being the Hollywood Madam to the Pahrump Pot Princess. Hollywood Innuendo's...
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Funny story: Liam Hemsworth Shocked At Ex-Fianceé's Miley Cyrus' MTV Music Video Awards Vulgar Performance

Liam Hemsworth Shocked At Ex-Fianceé's Miley Cyrus' MTV Music Video Awards Vulgar Performance

LOS ANGELES - Liam Hemsworth who ended his engagement to Miley Cyrus several months ago said he could not believe his eyes as he watched the 2013 MTV Music Video Awards Show which were held in the Barclay Center in Brooklyn. Hemsworth said that wh...
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Funny story: The Spufe Seaks Prufe Reeders

The Spufe Seaks Prufe Reeders

The webcite with the funiest spufe hed lines is luking for cualified prufe reeders to hep iliminate typoes and grammer erors. The Spufe spoksman, Reed Enwright, anounced tooday that thay are seaking expeerienced prufe reeders too impruve the cuali...
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Funny story: Secret NSA meeting on transparency blocked and bamboozled

Secret NSA meeting on transparency blocked and bamboozled

An inside report from NSA HQ indicates a very serious meeting of top NSA officials took place today to "buttress" the President's recent public remarks on more transparency needed for massive dragnet surveillance. These NSA officials cannot be nam...
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Funny story: Tweeter's drone nostalgia comes back to nip him badly

Tweeter's drone nostalgia comes back to nip him badly

Sources close to Time's correspondent who tweeted a wish to report on Julian Assange being attacked by a drone have noted his wish back-fired badly. And literally. A massive attack occurred directly afterwards on the reporter's left and right...
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Funny story: Only Two Teams Keep Crimson Tide On Their Schedules

Only Two Teams Keep Crimson Tide On Their Schedules

All schools playing the Alabama Crimson Tide except two have cancelled their games against the juggernaut for the upcoming season. The Virginia Tech Hokies, slated to start the season Aug. 31 at 4:30 p.m. (CT) in Atlanta's Georgia Dome, and the T...
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Funny story: Leno, Letterman, Fallon and O'Brien to Leave Late-Night if Weiner Loses

Leno, Letterman, Fallon and O'Brien to Leave Late-Night if Weiner Loses

NEW YORK, NY - In a rare act of unanimity, late night television hosts, Jay Leno, David Letterman, Jimmy Fallon and Conan Obrien have announced they will step down if Anthony Weiner does not win his bid to become Mayor of New York City, The Greatest...
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Funny story: Dolly Parton Says Nicki Minaj Needs To Throw All Of Her Makeup In The Trash Can

Dolly Parton Says Nicki Minaj Needs To Throw All Of Her Makeup In The Trash Can

WATERLOO, Iowa - Dolly Parton at 67, showed everyone that she can still bring 'em in as she performed before a sold-out concert at The Crop Rotation Convention Center in Waterloo. Parton sang all of her big hits from "Appalachian Memories" to "You...
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Funny story: Danica Patrick Agrees To Race In The Dubai 500

Danica Patrick Agrees To Race In The Dubai 500

NEW YORK CITY - Danica Patrick was visiting New York City when she was asked if it was true that she had agreed to enter The Dubai 500 auto race in September. Danica, who was dressed in a white NASCAR halter top and red, white, and blue shorts rep...
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Funny story: Justin Bieber's Automotive Luck Finally Runs Out

Justin Bieber's Automotive Luck Finally Runs Out

LOS ANGELES - Well it looks like Canadian singer Justin Bieber's automotive luck has finally run out. The 19-year-old singer was stopped in Calabasas at 4:31 a.m. for failure to properly stop at a stop sign. The officer who pulled him over stat...
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Funny story: Apple will unveil iWatch next week

Apple will unveil iWatch next week

CUPERTINO, CA - Apple announced today that it will release the iWatch in a few days. Timothy D. Cook, Apple CEO, told this reporter that the new iWatch will be launched on September 3, one day prior to the release of Samsung's new smartwatch and a...
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Funny story: The New York Yankees Are Told To Trade A-Rod

The New York Yankees Are Told To Trade A-Rod

NEW YORK CITY - Now that it appears that Alex Rodriguez has hired an attorney and plans on suing Major League Baseball, the New York Yankees have been advised that they may want to trade the third baseman and do it pretty soon. An unnamed source w...
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Funny story: Lamar Odom's Alleged Mistress Speaks Out

Lamar Odom's Alleged Mistress Speaks Out

LOS ANGELES - There are bound to be quite a bit of fireworks going off at the Kardashian Kompound now that Khloe Kardashian's husband Lamar Odom's alleged paramour has come out of the Holly(woodwork). According to iRumors, the so called 'Other' wo...
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Funny story: Dr. Sanjay Gupta To Drive Snack Delivery Van Cross Country

Dr. Sanjay Gupta To Drive Snack Delivery Van Cross Country

Hot off the smoking release of his documentary "Weed", Dr. Sanjay Gupta from CNN has decided to hook up with some buds and see the country. The good doctor will drive a salty snack delivery van cross country for the remainder of the year "to spread t...
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Funny story: Major League Baseball Mascot Reprimanded For Failing Performance Enhancing Drug Test

Major League Baseball Mascot Reprimanded For Failing Performance Enhancing Drug Test

NEW YORK CITY - The Performance Enhancing Drug Scandal is really getting out of hand and it has now reached a new level or rather depth. Major League Baseball has just announced that one of the team mascots has tested positive for performance enha...
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Funny story: What's In a Name? Plenty, According to Republicans.

What's In a Name? Plenty, According to Republicans.

Washington, D.C.- A group of Republican politicians led by Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, introduced a bill today that would create a national registry of pre-approved names that parents could pick from when naming their newborn children.
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Funny story: Longtime Senator Resigns-Enters Trappist Monastery in Georgia!

Longtime Senator Resigns-Enters Trappist Monastery in Georgia!

Longtime senator Chester Snavely held a press conference on the steps of the Repentant Sinner Monastery in Valdosta, Georgia as he announced his decision to resign from the Senate and become a monk. Senator Snavely, long known for his support of the...
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Funny story: President pledges new limits on press

President pledges new limits on press

WASHINGTON, DC - President Obama called Friday for greater control and more oversight of America's extensive press, including newspapers, websites and Costco flyers, acknowledging that recent disclosures have eroded public trust, while defending the...
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Funny story: Kim Jong Un Says He Wants To Purchase The NBA Houston Rockets

Kim Jong Un Says He Wants To Purchase The NBA Houston Rockets

PYONGYANG, North Korea - The latest news coming out of North Korea is that its leader Kim Jong Un has just expressed a desire to purchase the NBA Houston Rockets. A spokesperson for the Korean leader stated that Kim Jong Un has fallen in love with...
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Funny story: NJ Attorney General Investigating Donald Trump's Hair University

NJ Attorney General Investigating Donald Trump's Hair University

TRENTON-New Jersey officials have confirmed that Donald Trump's Hair University is under investigation for false claims and overcharging students for worthless information. Today's announcement follows New York's lawsuit against Trump for similar fa...
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Funny story: President Obama Suggests A New Gun Control Proposal

President Obama Suggests A New Gun Control Proposal

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama has vowed to meet the anti-gun control groups somewhere in the middle of the very heated gun control debate. The president has said that he has consulted half a dozen of his most trusted advisers and he believes...
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Funny story: Tim Tebow Looks Good Against The New York Giants - He May Escape The Next New England Patriots Cut

Tim Tebow Looks Good Against The New York Giants - He May Escape The Next New England Patriots Cut

FOXBOROUGH, Massachusetts - Tim Tebow and his legion of fans finally had something to cheer about on the gridiron as he threw two touchdown passes to help the New England Patriots defeat the New York Giants 28-20 in a preseason game. Tim, who wear...
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Funny story: Bloomberg wants to turn New York into a nudist camp

Bloomberg wants to turn New York into a nudist camp

New York -- Hold on to your hat… and your pants and shirt as well. The outgoing mayor is calling on his subjects to strip naked with the goal of turning New York City into the world's largest nudist colony. The proposal comes after Mayor Mike Bl...
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Funny story: Cory Booker wins Democrat primary, reveals he groped female, then announces run for NYC Mayor

Cory Booker wins Democrat primary, reveals he groped female, then announces run for NYC Mayor

NEWARK, NJ - Corry Booker, Mayor of Newark, announced today that he had groped a female friend, and that put's him in a position to run for New York City Mayor. Mr. Booker has also been dogged by accusations of corruption and malfeasance. His spok...
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Funny story: President Obama Picks The Two Teams He Says Will Meet In Super Bowl XLVIII

President Obama Picks The Two Teams He Says Will Meet In Super Bowl XLVIII

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama says he likes nothing better than going out on a limb as he gave his predictions as to which two NFL teams he thinks will be participating in next year's Super Bowl XLVIII. The president spoke with Zorro La Bamba...
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Funny story: Obama Favours Cupboard Reorganisation

Obama Favours Cupboard Reorganisation

WASHINGTON, DC - In an effort to maximise control of gouvernment, feel more European and minimise Amerika, the Obama administration is proposing reorganising his cupboard. Obama lead Barrister, Grant Moorhead, announced today that King Obama would...
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Funny story: Houston Astros Have The Worst Record In Baseball

Houston Astros Have The Worst Record In Baseball

HOUSTON - The Houston Astros are not only at the bottom of the American League West Division, they are also at the bottom of the entire 30 teams in Major League Baseball. The Astros are struggling with a record of 44-87. And many of their loyal fa...
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Funny story: John Boehner Signs John McCain into Sundog Alzheimer's Center

John Boehner Signs John McCain into Sundog Alzheimer's Center

APALACHICOLA, Fla. - House Speaker John Boehner (R-OH) today signed into a long-term Alzheimer's center long-established Arizona Senator John McCain. When asked why he did it, the terse and taciturn Boehner quipped, "It was a Republican thing to do.
View 'John Boehner Signs John McCain into Sundog Alzheimer's Center'
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