Funny story: Women should carry dead fetuses long time, Georgia state representative England

Women should carry dead fetuses long time, Georgia state representative England

ATLANTA, Ga. - State representative Terry England regaled the state house with stories of the olden days when he worked on a farm delivering dead pig and cow fetuses. Equating these barnyard friends with human females, England argued that what's good...
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Funny story: Al Gore Files Patent Application for Internet

Al Gore Files Patent Application for Internet

Sources confirmed yesterday that former Vice President Al Gore has filed an intellectual property claim regarding the Internet, also known as the World Wide Web. Gore, who in 2005 declared that he was responsible for inventing the Internet, reportedl...
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Funny story: Romney Strapped Family Pet Turtle to Sole of Shoe on Walkabout

Romney Strapped Family Pet Turtle to Sole of Shoe on Walkabout

Mitt Romney deflected reporters' incessant questions about Seamus, the family dog that he strapped to the car roof for a family vacation in 1983, by pointing out that he tied "Flatfoot" the family pet turtle under the sole of his shoe for the duratio...
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Funny story: Rosie O'Donnell Devastated At Being Fired By Oprah Winfrey But Refuses To Fire Back At The Talk Show Queen

Rosie O'Donnell Devastated At Being Fired By Oprah Winfrey But Refuses To Fire Back At The Talk Show Queen

NEW YORK CITY - Rosie O'Donnell is not exactly a happy little camper these days and to actually be politically and geographically correct Miss O'Donnell is neither happy nor little. Those were the sentiments of iRumors reporter Ling Chow Rangoon w...
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Funny story: UK 'most internet-based economy'

UK 'most internet-based economy'

The UK has the world's largest proportion of its economy based on the internet, statistics revealed today, putting it ahead of other high tech advanced economies like Japan, Germany and the Vatican. Prime Minister David Cameron praised the news, sayi...
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Funny story: St. Patrick's Day Miracle! More Beer AFTER St. Paddy's Day Party than BEFORE

St. Patrick's Day Miracle! More Beer AFTER St. Paddy's Day Party than BEFORE

In what Irish-Americans are touting as a modern-day St. Patrick's Day miracle, Lower East Side New Yorker Mary McGarry discovered that there was even more beer in her home the morning AFTER her rollicking St. Paddy's Day party than there had been bef...
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Funny story: Cameron Announces Lighter Evenings For London's 2012 Olympic Games!

Cameron Announces Lighter Evenings For London's 2012 Olympic Games!

The government announced today that Britain's clocks are to go forward by four hours from July 27 until August 12 this summer, during the London 2012 Olympic Games. The decision follows last week's announcement that the usual Sunday trading laws woul...
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Funny story: Lady Gaga Taking Vow Of Silence & Meekness

Lady Gaga Taking Vow Of Silence & Meekness

According to her agent, Lady Gaga is taking a comparative vow of silence for the next year to refresh herself and see what she wants to do for the next few years. "I guess you noticed that she didn't say anything outrageous during her latest inter...
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Funny story: Oprah Fires Rosie, Then Does Dance!

Oprah Fires Rosie, Then Does Dance!

After telling the press that she was having to fire Rosie O'Donnell and cancel her show, a saddened, tearful Oprah left her press conference and went into her office. Where she apparently did a fancy dance for a good ten minutes, according to a pe...
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Funny story: Al Qaeda attempt to claim responsibility for introducing invasive crayfish into British waters

Al Qaeda attempt to claim responsibility for introducing invasive crayfish into British waters

Scratchy video footage released on jihadist internet forums last night appears to show an Al Qaeda spokesman attempting to claim responsibility for the devastating invasion of foreign crayfish on British waters. The signal crayfish was thought to...
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Funny story: Dial Introduces Left Guard Deodorant

Dial Introduces Left Guard Deodorant

The Dial Corporation has announced plans to introduce Left Guard deodorant. Left Guard will be positioned for the sports enthusiast, and TV commercials will feature famous left-handed athletes such as Reggie Jackson, Bruce Jenner, Bill Walton an...
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Funny story: Candidates for Archbishop of Canterbury post announced

Candidates for Archbishop of Canterbury post announced

After an initial flurry by headhunting and recruitment parasites who quickly withdrew when they realised there was no commission in it, the official short list has been announced. Chief Rabbi Lord Sachs who himself is retiring soon was in talks wi...
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Funny story: "Obama wrong on health care, wrong on God and the American way, wrong on the brackets!"

"Obama wrong on health care, wrong on God and the American way, wrong on the brackets!"

The three remaining Republican candidates for President of the United States held a rare joint press conference his morning and issued a statement that most observers are saying will cut across all race, party, gender, income, and ethnic lines. The...
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Funny story: Rick Santorum Switches Position And Favors Rights For Women

Rick Santorum Switches Position And Favors Rights For Women

Having had a long conversation with the ghost of Mitt Romney's female dog Seamus, Rick Santorum switched positions on women's rights and decided to support all rights for women including: birth control, abortion, family planning, Obama care, lipstick...
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Funny story: Skunk cultivating Harry Potter star up on petrol bomb riot charges

Skunk cultivating Harry Potter star up on petrol bomb riot charges

London - A July 2009 slap on the wrists for Harry Potter actor Jamie Waylett was all that Westminster Magistrates Court imposed following the discovery of 20 marijuana plants growing at his mother's Kilburn home. Today Wood Green Crown Court heard...
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Funny story: London UFO belting out 'If I Fooled The World Every Day Would Be The First Day Of Sting' subliminals: report

London UFO belting out 'If I Fooled The World Every Day Would Be The First Day Of Sting' subliminals: report

London - The MoD confirmed today it was monitoring the flypast anthem ahead of Tuesday's Vernal Equinox. A tip-off from the International Space Station saw RAF jets scrambled to check out intelligence taht an alien mothership is about to suck up i...
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Funny story: Rolls Royce abducts Ed Miliband!

Rolls Royce abducts Ed Miliband!

Ed Miliband was on his way to a NHS rally to give his support to these very important causes; nurses pay, bad conditions, closing NHS hospitals, etc. Ed was also not feeling well himself that day, but still he managed to rally up enough strength. He...
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Funny story: Nudists' Top 15 All-Time Movie Favorites

Nudists' Top 15 All-Time Movie Favorites

Following is the top 15 all-time movie favorites of nudists everywhere. Over 10,000 nudists were asked their favorites and we interviewed some of the ladies twice, just to be sure.) 15. Saving Ryan's Privates 14. Fred's Willy 13. Tool Hand Luke 12. A Man Called Horse (As you can see) 11. The Shower Shank Redemption 10. The Thing 9. Raging Tool 8. My Big Fat Italia...
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Funny story: Shades of Robert Maxwell/Trinity Mirror scam as Chancellor George Osborne eyes £28bn Royal Mail pension pot

Shades of Robert Maxwell/Trinity Mirror scam as Chancellor George Osborne eyes £28bn Royal Mail pension pot

London - The old KGB/Mossad fraudster famously bankrupted Mirror Group pensioners of their retirement earnings in a scam now being resuscitated by UK Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne. A huge £28bn Post Office pensions nest egg is due to...
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Funny story: Transfer Window: Di Matteo sends Chelsea scouts to watch non-league striker

Transfer Window: Di Matteo sends Chelsea scouts to watch non-league striker

Chelsea are among a host of clubs tracking non-league hot shot Ollie Palmer. Palmer, 20, who plays for Blue Square South strugglers Havant and Waterlooville, has been watched in his last two games by scouts for Roberto Di Matteo. Palmer said: "...
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Funny story: Homoeopathic paint cures colour blindness

Homoeopathic paint cures colour blindness

Pseudo Sciences have developed a new formulation paint that has been shown in clinical trials to cure colour blindness. The new paint, available in any colour, is used like ordinary paint and comes in both matt and gloss. "We take common dyes...
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Funny story: Ron Paul Arrested Outside Of Ross Perot's Home For Stalking

Ron Paul Arrested Outside Of Ross Perot's Home For Stalking

DALLAS -Throughout Ron Paul's campaign, there have been comparisons made to Ross Perot's prior attempts at the presidency. The extent of this obsession was uncovered late Sunday night when Ron Paul was arrested outside of Ross Perot's Dallas home.
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Funny story: Farmer's Wife Vehemently Denies Making Love With Village Idiot In Hay Loft

Farmer's Wife Vehemently Denies Making Love With Village Idiot In Hay Loft

"I didn't do it! It's a load of old nonsense!" farmer's wife Eliza Scud protested today, as she addressed allegations of a disturbingly erotic nature, posed to her by a man with nothing better to do. "We don't even have a hay loft, I'm not a farme...
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Funny story: Man almost breaks internet but not quite by writing extremely long title for spoof article, world reacts but more interested in other things to be honest, like Hillary Clinton and Russell Brand relationship rumours.

Man almost breaks internet but not quite by writing extremely long title for spoof article, world reacts but more interested in other things to be honest, like Hillary Clinton and Russell Brand relationship rumours.

The internet almost spectacularly collapsed at the weekend when a spate of long titled spoof articles were approved by spoof writers who were left holding the keys for the weekend. "The lunatics have taken over the asylum" said one man Melvyn Toof...
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Funny story: Cameron to Sell his Own Mother

Cameron to Sell his Own Mother

David Cameron has further advanced his privatisation plans, by announcing that he is to sell his own mother to sovereign wealth funds from countries such as China. He is expected to deliver a pre-budget speech calling for radical action to improve Br...
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Funny story: Hillary Clinton Rushed to Hospital, Suffers Mental Breakdown

Hillary Clinton Rushed to Hospital, Suffers Mental Breakdown

WASHINGTON - Hillary Clinton was rushed to Georgetown University Hospital late Sunday evening after suffering from a mental breakdown. After an anonymous tip was called in to local authorities, Officer Dwight Leram discovered the dazed and confused...
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Funny story: First details of Olympic route Torch bearers announced

First details of Olympic route Torch bearers announced

The first details of the route the Olympic torch will take, together with the torch-bearers carrying it, have been announced by the organising committee. It kicks off in Tottenham, pretty much like the riots, with Kevin Innit running through the s...
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Funny story: Alert: Real Life Is Way Too Similar To Fairy Tales

Alert: Real Life Is Way Too Similar To Fairy Tales

In a surprisingly good twist of fate I've been dating someone for the past two months who has yet to shock and horrify me. Fear not, his freak flag will fly sooner or later and make for a very interesting post, but until I can publicly mock him I will need to look a little harder to find inspiration. During my journey home from one of our "slumber parties" (after telling the tourist blocking th...
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Funny story: New Studies Target Human Stupidity, Answers Needed

New Studies Target Human Stupidity, Answers Needed

I am aware of the sad fact that I am not perfect. This information initially came to me in the form of an ex-boyfriend giving me another girl's ratty shirt (there was no way I owned that thing) when I went to claim my belongings only a day after the split. Thanks Steve, message received, loud and clear. Once I was forced to acknowledge my flaws, I began my "enlightenment phase," in which I began m...
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Funny story: 90s Style Icons: Gone But Not Forgotten

90s Style Icons: Gone But Not Forgotten

It may seem hard to believe, but there was a time when socks were scrunched, skinny "jeans" weren't made of denim (or for women), and Cher Horowitz was idolized by all. Although there is irrefutable evidence proving the '90s were a dark time for America regarding all things fashion, these icons definitely bring back memories of a simpler time (when news came on paper, carrying a cell phone was con...
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Funny story: Rumor Confirmed: Romney Will Form

Rumor Confirmed: Romney Will Form

NEW YORK - Rumors of a "United States 2.0″ have recently spread throughout the Internet with the rising threat of Rick Santorum as a noteworthy contender in the 2012 Republican presidential race. Today, Fox News confirmed these rumors in an interview...
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Funny story: Santorum To Turn Washington Monument Into Crucifix

Santorum To Turn Washington Monument Into Crucifix

NEW YORK, NY Worldwide famous psychic Sylvia Browne appeared on "The Today Show" Monday morning and revealed Republican Presidential hopeful Rick Santorum's alarming plans for the Washington Monument. Santorum is allegedly planning on turning the Egy...
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Funny story: Advice, Support, & Tips for Security Guards - from Inchcock - Part Three

Advice, Support, & Tips for Security Guards - from Inchcock - Part Three

Copied from the author's first and Editors Advice Page, of his 'Inchcock Monthly Guards Gazette', Issue 144, published in August 2009. (When I say published, he produced it and ran off a few copies for his fellow Security Officers at the Company he worked at who made him redundant through no fault of his own at 62 years of age, and he was the only employee on the firm never to have taken a day...
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Funny story: Teen girl wants her parents to punish her

Teen girl wants her parents to punish her

A 16 year old straight A student in El Paso, Texas claims her parents never punish her when she does wrong. She claims that when she was issued her 1st detention, her parents did not punish her or give her a lecture at all, instead they laughed th...
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Funny story: Lady Gaga Explains Her Vow of Silence

Lady Gaga Explains Her Vow of Silence

NEW YORK CITY - No one in the history of the entertainment industry has ever spent more money on costumes than Lady Gaga and that includes the gender bender Boy George of Culture Club. Lady Gaga, who will turn 26, on March 28, was recently intervi...
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Funny story: Area Man Happy To Once Again Not Be Irish

Area Man Happy To Once Again Not Be Irish

BOSTON-While hoards of inebriated partygoers celebrated the inconsequentially misunderstood holiday of St. Patrick's Day behind him, Boston native and resident sour puss Jerry Doogan, slowly sipped his pint of Guinness at the bar of the Squealing...
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Funny story: Batman must be stopped

Batman must be stopped

Batman is nothing but a strong, good-looking, rich, smart, generous son-of-a-bitch vigilante. He can't fly. He can't bend steel or stop bullets with his hands. He can't run 60 miles an hour. He can't cast webs. What he can do, though, is kill crim...
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