Funny story: Barking kebab take-away owner loses winning £63.8m EuroSquillions ticket

Barking kebab take-away owner loses winning £63.8m EuroSquillions ticket

Isle of Dogs - A late night fast food cafe owner is in shock this weekend after a trainee put the winning lottery ticket inside a customer's take away kebab. Five numbers and the two all-important star balls came up trumps for Barking Blue Moon Ke...
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Funny story: Joey Barton Uncovers Alien Brain Beetle Project Head Quarters in Heart of London

Joey Barton Uncovers Alien Brain Beetle Project Head Quarters in Heart of London

A private investigator who works for a very serious London broadsheet newspaper has tonight revealed that Joey Barton has become a hero by uncovering the headquarters of the Alien Brain Beetle project. Alien Brain Beetles, as you probably alread...
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Funny story: Ray Bradbury's Final Prophecy

Ray Bradbury's Final Prophecy

It has been reported in a very respectable New York Science fiction magazine that Ray Bradbury left the world with one final prophecy before he went to join the big book club in the sky. He is said to have told the editor of the journal that one...
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Funny story: The Zeta drug cartel resorts to random fear

The Zeta drug cartel resorts to random fear

The Zeta drug cartel released a statement this Saturday that they will stop harming innocent by standards if the police stay away from their drug operations. They are taking responsibility for training and releasing pit bulls on the streets in New...
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Funny story: Mitt Romney has millions of credit card passwords stolen

Mitt Romney has millions of credit card passwords stolen

Boston (June 10)-Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney announced on Sunday morning's edition of 'Meet the Gay Press' that he has recently had millions of credit card accounts and passwords stolen. When asked about his creditworthiness, in...
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Funny story: Repeal the Logan Act?

Repeal the Logan Act?

Lafayette Park is directly across the street from the White House. Practically every day somebody sets up a soapbox and the lecturers the president (or the presidency itself) in absentia, usually. But somebody is watching, and he's not your brother...
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Funny story: Old Woman Lost Inside Mall For 30 Years

Old Woman Lost Inside Mall For 30 Years

King of Prussia, PA-- An 85-year old spinster has finally found the exit door of the mall after 30 years of looking. Miss Vicki Smegma walked into the Mega Mall on December 24, 1982 and became hopelessly lost. After decades of wandering around she...
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Funny story: England Have 0.000765% Chance Of Winning Euro 2012 Says Dorking Academic

England Have 0.000765% Chance Of Winning Euro 2012 Says Dorking Academic

The England football team's chances of winning the Euro 2012 tournament have been rated as 0.000756% by a leading Dorking Professor, writes Sport, Fishing, Linoleum, Commercial Grass Cultivation, Wheelbarrow Design, Spats, Mathematics & Entertain...
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Funny story: HG Wells's The Time Machine, as read by the author

HG Wells's The Time Machine, as read by the author

Tim Travola of Glasgow has been a massive fan of the novel HG Wells's The Time Machine since being eight years old. So much so, that it is the only book he has ever read, since discovering it. "I got to the point where I had to have it playing in the car while I drove," said Travola. "Then I started to wish I could have the audio version as read by the author." Unfortunately for Travola, HG...
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Funny story: "My Critics Are All Tossers" Says Verity Warbling-Trollblog

"My Critics Are All Tossers" Says Verity Warbling-Trollblog

Skoob Entertainment News's latest staff addition, Ms Verity Warbling-Trollblog has sensationally dismissed her critics as being "a bunch of tossers." Ms Warbling-Trollblog, who made her SEN debut on Saturday with a string of ludicrous celebrity re...
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Funny story: Mayor Johnson Tells Olympic Athletes To Use Litter Bins When Competing On London Streets This Summer!

Mayor Johnson Tells Olympic Athletes To Use Litter Bins When Competing On London Streets This Summer!

London Mayor Boris Johnson has said the Olympic competitors in this summer's marathons and other competitions taking place on the streets of London, will not be exempt from on-the-spot fines or even arrest if found to be dropping litter during those...
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Funny story: New Yorkers Tired of Bending Over for 'Stop and Frisk'; Cops Suggest Alternatives

New Yorkers Tired of Bending Over for 'Stop and Frisk'; Cops Suggest Alternatives

New York - The heat is on the "stop and frisk" powers of the NYPD. Heavy political pressure has prompted Police Commissioner Raymond Kelly to develop alternatives to a procedure that allows police to detain and search anyone, at any time, withou...
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Funny story: The Queen Quits Britain to Move in With Will.i.am in California and Record First R&B Album

The Queen Quits Britain to Move in With Will.i.am in California and Record First R&B Album

British leaders are holding emergency talks as the nation woke up to an unexpected Jubilee hangover. The nation and the world is coming to terms with the fact that the Queen - who one week earlier was celebrating her six decades on the throne - has a...
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Funny story: "Nigella Lawson Didn't Really Eat An Aborted Pig Foetus" - Claims Verity Warbling-Trollblog

"Nigella Lawson Didn't Really Eat An Aborted Pig Foetus" - Claims Verity Warbling-Trollblog

Claims by American celebrity chef Anthony Bourdain, that 'tasty' Brit chef Nigella Lawson claimed to have roasted and eaten an aborted pig foetus, have been roundly ridiculed by SEN's latest acquisition, Ms Verity Warbling-Trollblog. Apparently, t...
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Funny story: Justin Bieber's Mom Pleads With Him To Enter Into A Rehab Clinic To Deal With His Anger

Justin Bieber's Mom Pleads With Him To Enter Into A Rehab Clinic To Deal With His Anger

LA BREA - Justin Bieber's mom Pattie Mallette, 36, was in La Brea visiting the world famous La Brea Tar Pits. She was quietly sitting in the La Brea Tar Pits Diner lunching on a Pancho Villa Deluxe Chicken Fajita Plate when she was approached by M...
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Funny story: Quentin Kelp MP - Something for the weekend

Quentin Kelp MP - Something for the weekend

Dear Constituents I have had a most hectic week That Mrs Delloitte was on the train again on Wednesday morning. Why she couldn't take the entire Jubilee week off like most retired people I don't know. At least she was not sat in my seat, but, as usual, she appeared to be reading the Financial Times. I suspect she uses it to conceal a copy of Sporting Life inside because she always has a pen...
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Funny story: "Rio Ferdinand To Play For Ireland In Euro 2012" - Shock Announcement From Verity Warbling-Trollblog

"Rio Ferdinand To Play For Ireland In Euro 2012" - Shock Announcement From Verity Warbling-Trollblog

Out of favour England skipper Rio Ferdinand will be appearing at Euro 2012 - representing the Republic Of Ireland - according to SEN's latest acquisition, Ms Verity Warbling-Trollblog. "It's all true," Ms Warbling-Trollblog wrote on her website. "...
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Funny story: NFL switches to NGL: National Gladiators League

NFL switches to NGL: National Gladiators League

Roger Goodell, Commissioner of the National Football League stunned the nation this afternoon at a press conference in which he disbanded the NFL! "It is time we cut to the chase," said Goodell. "The Lilly Livered, the Nervous Nellies, and the G...
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Funny story: "Prince Harry Not Remotely Interested In Cheryl Cole Or Katy Perry" Says Verity Warbling-Trollblog

"Prince Harry Not Remotely Interested In Cheryl Cole Or Katy Perry" Says Verity Warbling-Trollblog

Following their appearance together on the Graham Norton Show, where Cheryl Cole and Katy Perry expressed a very public interest in the UK's most eligible bachelor boy, Prince Harry, by inviting him to 'call them,' - SEN's Verity Warbling Trollblog s...
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Funny story: Dorking cross dresser makes it into the Guinness Book of Records

Dorking cross dresser makes it into the Guinness Book of Records

Harvey Bristol, aka Cindy, has made it into the Guinness Book of Records by becoming the fastest cross dresser in the world, beating off stiff competition from regular winners of the Speed Cross Dressing contest from Thailand. This year's speed cr...
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Funny story: Cheryl Cole gets Prince Harry nod for Trooping the Colour

Cheryl Cole gets Prince Harry nod for Trooping the Colour

London - A ringside seat at next Saturday's spectacle is in the Swarowski crystal-encrusted Gucci bag for singer Cheryl. According to a Chelsea postman with x-ray vision a gold-embossed Palace invitation signed 'Luv From Hazza' landed on La Cole'...
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Funny story: Romney Attempts to Speak Spanish to Latino Audience

Romney Attempts to Speak Spanish to Latino Audience

Tuscon, Az- "Yo no tengo guacamole, yo is sad." said Romney to blank stares from the Latino Chamber of Commerce in Tuscon, Arizona. "Is he speaking Spanish?" asked Frederico Gomez, father of a local Catholic Church. "No," said his friend Carlos Es...
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Funny story: "Cheryl Cole Will Never Forgive Simon Cowell For Putting Itching Powder In Her Knickers On X-Factor" Says Verity Warbling-Trollblog

"Cheryl Cole Will Never Forgive Simon Cowell For Putting Itching Powder In Her Knickers On X-Factor" Says Verity Warbling-Trollblog

It would appear that SEN's latest acquisition, Verity Warbling-Trollblog is on something of a roll. Following shock revelations involving Fearne Cotton and HRH Prince Philip, Ms Warbling Trollblog has now made it public that Geordie caterwauler, Cher...
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Funny story: Sex Kitten Ad Disappoints Local Man

Sex Kitten Ad Disappoints Local Man

A Utah man is considering suing internet listing site craigslist after he spent several thousands of dollars in a prostitution con that some attorneys may not have been a con but simply a misunderstanding. Ishmael Sconer, 34, clicked on advertisem...
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Funny story: Heidi Klum Divorce Battle Heats Up - Joins Canadian Hunters to Champion Seal Fur

Heidi Klum Divorce Battle Heats Up - Joins Canadian Hunters to Champion Seal Fur

The so called amicable split earlier this year between what was deemed Hollywood's most solid marriage has taken a turn for the worse. Heidi Klum has revealed the depth of her anger as she turned on her soon to be ex-husband and launched a damagi...
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Funny story: "Actress" Lindsay Lohan In Hospital After Contracting "Zombie Virus" and Crashing Car

"Actress" Lindsay Lohan In Hospital After Contracting "Zombie Virus" and Crashing Car

"Actress" Lindsay Lohan has contracted the dreaded "zombie virus" but she may have unwittingly found a cure for the epidemic that affects the brain due to her brain not being as developed as other victims. Lohan, 25, was taken to the UCLA Medical...
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Funny story: "Prince Philip Released From Hospital - With A Quail's Egg In His Underpants" Says Verity Warbling-Trollblog

"Prince Philip Released From Hospital - With A Quail's Egg In His Underpants" Says Verity Warbling-Trollblog

Today's headline news - that Prince Philip has been released from hospital - has been widely reported, but only SEN's Verity Warbling-Trollblog got the real inside scoop on the story, by revealing that the Prince must keep a quail's egg in his underp...
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Funny story: The Absolutely Positively Definitive Story on Is Tiger Woods Back! Stephen Hawking Gives Definitive Answer

The Absolutely Positively Definitive Story on Is Tiger Woods Back! Stephen Hawking Gives Definitive Answer

Dublin, Ohio - Is Tiger Woods Back? The question has rung out through out the land. But according to greens keeper Morty McSnerd at a small par 3 course in Dublin Ohio, the question is completely lupid. "The press should be ashamed, they are compl...
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Funny story: "Fearne Cotton To Buy A Komodo Dragon To Ward Off Cyber Bullies" Says Verity Warbling-Trollblog

"Fearne Cotton To Buy A Komodo Dragon To Ward Off Cyber Bullies" Says Verity Warbling-Trollblog

BBC TV presenter Fearne Cotton is to buy a Komodo Dragon as an attack pet in order to fend off cyber bullies and potential stalkers, SEN has learned. Ms Cotton has complained that people are unncessarily cruel and hurtful, after widespread condemn...
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Funny story: iPhone 5 may not be good enough for consumers

iPhone 5 may not be good enough for consumers

Fears are growing that the much anticipated iPhone 5 may not be good enough to take on the new generation of Android phones. "Without Steve Jobs to push through ridiculous sounding ideas that turn out to be winners, they may struggle to be ground-...
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Funny story: Angela Merkel named Men's Magazine's June's Sexiest woman

Angela Merkel named Men's Magazine's June's Sexiest woman

In a strange twist, THE magazine for blokes (not men, guys or boys, but blokes) has released its June Sexiest Women List and it is topped by German Chancellor, Angela Merkel. "It's not who I would have chosen," said editor, Penelope Niss. "I'd hav...
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Funny story: Euro 2012: BBC hire Monty Python as match pundits

Euro 2012: BBC hire Monty Python as match pundits

The BBC announced today that Monty Python cast will join the broadcaster to act as football pundits and reporters during the Euro 2012 tournament in Poland and Ukraine, and also during the Olympics. It is believed the comedy sketch show cast who b...
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Funny story: Cameron Tells The Germans!

Cameron Tells The Germans!

It takes a brave person to tell the Germans to get sorted but British Boss, David 'the Brave' Cameron has done just that! German Chancellor Merkel could not hear his advice since she had turned off her translation facility but she knew the gist of...
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Funny story: Celebrity look-a-like? There's an app for that

Celebrity look-a-like? There's an app for that

Have people said you look like Stephen Merchant? Dr Phil Hammond? Or less polite, have they said you look like one of the heroin addicts from Trainspotting? Now it is possible to reciprocate, and find the celebrity that people look most like using th...
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Funny story: Classical Music Revealed As Scam

Classical Music Revealed As Scam

The Assistant Chairman of the National Organisation for Classical Music yesterday revealed the truth regarding allegations made against the genre by members of the public. Sir George Michael was ostensibly forced into making the following statement due to the mounting protests from the masses that classical music was unconstitutional as a genre. Sir Michael made the statement in Bonn on Tuesday...
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Funny story: Kim Kardashian Buys Boyfriend Kanye West A $474,000 Lamborghini Aventador LP 700-4 For His Birthday

Kim Kardashian Buys Boyfriend Kanye West A $474,000 Lamborghini Aventador LP 700-4 For His Birthday

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Kim Kardashian is still legally married to New Jersey Nets star Kris Humphries but apparently that did not stop her from buying her brand new "brofriend" Kanye West a very expensive car for his 35th birthday. Kim plucked down $47...
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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan Totals Her Porsche - California State Troopers Rule Out Cosmetics

Lindsay Lohan Totals Her Porsche - California State Troopers Rule Out Cosmetics

SANTA MONICA - Lindsay Lohan is one very, very lucky young starlet after being involved in an accident on the PCH (Pacific Coast Highway) that totaled her black Porsche. According to California State Troopers Aaron Twixfellino and Hamilton Leno, n...
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Funny story: Arizona Sheriff Joe Arpaio Arrests Three Zombie Prostitutes

Arizona Sheriff Joe Arpaio Arrests Three Zombie Prostitutes

MARICOPA COUNTY, Arizona - The self-proclaimed greatest sheriff in America, Joe "Pinky" Arpaio has just announced that he and a deputy have captured three very strange looking individuals. Sheriff Arpaio informed Rumsfeld Muddlefish a reporter wit...
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Funny story: Miss Pennsylvania Refuses To Apologize To Donald Trump and Says She's Moving Down To Mexico

Miss Pennsylvania Refuses To Apologize To Donald Trump and Says She's Moving Down To Mexico

TROUT RUN, Pennsylvania - The former Miss Pennsylvania, Sheena Junglevina Monnin, was at a local Burger Bandit signing autographs with the purchase of a Burger Bandit Burger Combo Deal. She was asked by Taffeta Kixx with iRumors if she plans to ap...
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Funny story: Ashley Olsen Angry At Her Twin Sister Mary-Kate For Dating A Man Almost Old Enough To Be Their Grandfather

Ashley Olsen Angry At Her Twin Sister Mary-Kate For Dating A Man Almost Old Enough To Be Their Grandfather

NEW YORK CITY - For most of their lives the Olsen twins, Mary-Kate and Ashley have pretty much agreed on everything from acting to fashion designing and from salad ingredient choices to their favorite American Idol contestant. The 25-year-old twin...
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