Funny story: Residents attack speed limit pans

Residents attack speed limit pans

Controversial proposals to reduce speeding by placing big metal frying pans on the roads in built-up areas have upset local residents in Chipping Norton. Ministry of Transport officials said that speed bumps were no longer effective in curbing spe...
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Funny story: Gingrich's Daughter's Prayer

Gingrich's Daughter's Prayer

Sounding like a prayer, two of Newt Gingrich daughters issued a statement following wife number two's revelation in a ABC Brian Ross interview: Newton Leroy wanted an open marriage and to continue his relationship with his mistress, Callista. The above fails to sound like a family values candidate of South Carolina. Hence, the daughters statement. Sort of sounding like: Our father, which...
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Funny story: Dinosaurs discovered in the Falklands

Dinosaurs discovered in the Falklands

Prehistoric reptiles have been discovered roaming wild in the Falkland Islands, a UK government scientist announced today, to the great surprise of the zoological world. The dinosaurs include T-Rex's, Stegosauri, and other dangerous creatures once th...
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Funny story: Kill School Coming Soon to UK

Kill School Coming Soon to UK

Come 2015 there will be a rash of schools popping up all along the arse of England. Will the government provide the soothing lotion to combat this threat? No it seems the government is giving it's full backing (not to mention a fuck tonne of money) to see that military run "Kill Schools" for the most troubled youths will come to fruition. We tried to gain access to a military spokesman despite...
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Funny story: Warning as container ship breaks wind

Warning as container ship breaks wind

A stranded container ship has finally split in two off the coast of New Zealand. In a massive explosion last month, it spewed out more than 300 containers of baked beans and sprouts, leaving a trail of debris over three miles of shoreline. It is the...
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Funny story: The Spoof joins in internet protest over piracy

The Spoof joins in internet protest over piracy

The Spoof's readers have been taking part in a protest against the US's new SOPA (Stop Online Piracy Act) legislation which is currently passing through the Senate. Other websites, such as Wikipedia, have taken themselves down for the day in order to...
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Funny story: Footy fav pin-up, Imogen T. scared of silicone slip-up!

Footy fav pin-up, Imogen T. scared of silicone slip-up!

Over-loaded, footy fav pin-up girl (amongst other activities), Imogen T. (name altered for legal reasons, but you know who I mean) has been frightened "stiff" (now that takes some doing!). It seems that Imogen has a silicone slip-up job and that can...
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Funny story: "I Am Not A Cock Jockey!" Insists South Coast Burger Flipper

"I Am Not A Cock Jockey!" Insists South Coast Burger Flipper

Devon burger flipper, Colin Snatch reacted angrily to reports that he may be a closet cock jockey, following criticism of his self-published manifesto, 'I'm Not Really Gay - I Just Like Wrestling!' Snatch, 49, the oldest burger flipper in Newton A...
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Funny story: Royal Boat Show

Royal Boat Show

To coincide with the upcoming mass hysteria for the Queen's Diamond Jubilee Boatshow during June hence, 'Atlas Editions' that well known publishing house responsible for churning out endless crap collectables is 'launching' a new weekly magazine.
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Funny story: Worthing Folk Up In Arms Over Sunniest Place Accolade

Worthing Folk Up In Arms Over Sunniest Place Accolade

Storm clouds are gathering over the normally genteel coast of East and West Sussex. The great and good of Eastbourne and Hastings are at eachother's throats over which resort can boast the title of 'sunniest place in the UK.' Eastbourne appear...
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Funny story: School For Big Nobs Tells Ramblers Where To Shove It

School For Big Nobs Tells Ramblers Where To Shove It

A top public school has upset its neighbours with plans to swap its nine-hole golf course for nearby land owned by the National Trust. But the choice of the new site for the Stowe School's course has angered nearby walkers and ramblers, who argue...
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Funny story: "Rihanna hits the cross trainer...wearing just a TINY white bikini" - DM Wins Piffle Prize Again

"Rihanna hits the cross trainer...wearing just a TINY white bikini" - DM Wins Piffle Prize Again

The Daily Mail has scooped todays Piffle Prize with yet another astonishingly meaningless headline. In fact, the above headline is merely an abridged version, edited to fit on Twitter. In all its gory glory, the headline reads: "That's not your no...
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Funny story: Political Facebook - Newt Gingrich and Rick Perry

Political Facebook - Newt Gingrich and Rick Perry

POLITICAL FACEBOOK Newt Gingrich: Rick I am going to have to ask you to please refrain from mentioning my two ex-wives and the fact that I dumped them. My present wife Callista is upset and she is starting to get a little bit insecure. 11:20 a.m. Rick Perry: I'm sorry Newt, I do recall your first wife and your second wife but I cannot recall your third wife. 11:24 a.m. Newt Gingrich: Lo...
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Funny story: Political Facebook - Michele Bachmann and Ron Paul

Political Facebook - Michele Bachmann and Ron Paul

POLITICAL FACEBOOK Ron Paul: Hi Michele, the guys sure do miss your pretty smiling face at our GOP debates. I just thought I'd say hi and ask if you have forgiven me for saying that your stupid hairdo looks fake. 4:27 p.m. Michele Bachmann: Hi Ronnie, no I have not and I thought that I asked you to stop making entries into my Facebook account. I am still mad about the remark where you said...
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Funny story: Romney's assets managed on "blind basis," candidate plans to manage U.S. economy in same fashion

Romney's assets managed on "blind basis," candidate plans to manage U.S. economy in same fashion

CHARLESTON, Sc. - Sandra Andres, a spokeswoman for Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney, wrote in an email to reporters that the Romneys' assets, which are estimated at $200 million, are managed on "a blind basis." To define this term, sh...
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Funny story: Derek to meet Brown in 1 trillion dollar spectacular!

Derek to meet Brown in 1 trillion dollar spectacular!

There have been some Classic fights over the years, such as Ali V's Frazer, Marvellous Marvin Haggler V's Thomas (the hitman) Hearns, and who can forget Chris (simply the best) Eubanks V's Nigel (the dark destroyer) Benn! Since those good old days gr...
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Funny story: Kodak to be Bailed Out by Chuck Norris

Kodak to be Bailed Out by Chuck Norris

Following Chuck Norris's announcement that he will assume the Presidency in 2013, his financial advisors disclosed today that Mr. Norris will also take over the ailing Kodak Corporation in an apparent move to "Kick its butt back into shape". With...
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Funny story: Derek Acorah to cameo on Coronation Street

Derek Acorah to cameo on Coronation Street

World-famous superstar celebrity psychic, Derek Acorah, has been asked to appear in an episode of Coronation Street playing a world-famous superstar celebrity psychic called Eric D'Accora. "Derek is very excited," said Acorah's agent, Eric D'Accor...
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Funny story: Wahlberg: 'Regrets, I had few...'

Wahlberg: 'Regrets, I had few...'

Hollywood actor Mark Wahlberg has apologized for his "ridiculous" remarks concerning the 9/11 terrorist attacks. Wahlberg told a men's magazine that if he had been on one of the planes as intended he would have: 'kicked the ass' of the terrorists...
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Funny story: Queen's reign will end 'much like Costa Concordia' stargazers warn

Queen's reign will end 'much like Costa Concordia' stargazers warn

London - Belly-up predictions published today foresee a beached Prince of Wails and his Gorgon wife stand trial for treason on Tyburn Hill. Hellfire Club sibyls are pretty certain the Costa Concordia sinking is a true lodestar omen as far as celes...
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Funny story: Cellulite? There's an app for that

Cellulite? There's an app for that

Coming straight out of Apple Core Labs and into an App Store near you is the latest in applelet based keep fit: iThigh. "I'm not a woman," said App World! editor Mac Buck. "I never have been. But I'm told that many woman detest cellulite. For year...
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Funny story: Dave will go dark for 24 hours in support of Wikipedia

Dave will go dark for 24 hours in support of Wikipedia

The UK Freeview channel, Dave, is to go dark in support of Wikipedia, by broadcasting nothing but information on the anti-piracy bills currently under debate in the American Senate. "I know American laws shouldn't affect us," said channel co-ordin...
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Funny story: Chocolate Digestive Biscuits Can Aid In The Hunt For Serial Killers Says Local Man

Chocolate Digestive Biscuits Can Aid In The Hunt For Serial Killers Says Local Man

Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, today added his contribution to serial killer research by saying that chocolate digestive biscuits can be a fundamental element in the tracking down and apprehension of seriously disturbed serial killers. According t...
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Funny story: Macclesfield Town striker Ben Mills shocked by pro set-up

Macclesfield Town striker Ben Mills shocked by pro set-up

Macclesfield striker Benjy Mills says he is shocked by the amount of free time he now has after turning professional. The 22-year-old joined from non-league side Nantwich Town last week and made his debut in the 2-1 defeat by Torquay. "It's cer...
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Funny story: Beer and sex 'must be sold' at Brazil World Cup, says Fifa

Beer and sex 'must be sold' at Brazil World Cup, says Fifa

Beer and sex must be sold at all venues hosting matches in the 2014 World Cup in Brazil, football's world governing body, Fifa, has insisted. Fifa General Secretary Jerome Valcke said the right to sell beer and sex must be enshrined in a World Cup...
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Funny story: Facebook unveils 60 new ways to waste time under latest expansion plan

Facebook unveils 60 new ways to waste time under latest expansion plan

Facebook is adding a series of new applications to let users share such things as photos, travel or fashion. The online social network firm unveiled more than 60 new ways to waste time on Facebook. The company, tipped for a $100bn initial public o...
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Funny story: Support wanes in US Congress for anti-piracy SOPA/PIPA bill

Support wanes in US Congress for anti-piracy SOPA/PIPA bill

Eight US lawmakers have withdrawn their support for anti-piracy laws, after "blackout" protests on thousands of internet porn sites. Two of the bill's co-sponsors, Mario Mario from Florida and Billy Blunt from Missouri, are among those backing awa...
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Funny story: Shock as David Beckham signs new deal at LA Galaxy

Shock as David Beckham signs new deal at LA Galaxy

The World of Sport was rocked to its very foundations when it was announced that David Beckham has signed a new two-year deal at LA Galaxy. Many thought that the football star wanted to return home to the UK as soon as possible with his wife Thin...
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Funny story: Transfer Window: David Beckham extends LA Galaxy stay with new contract

Transfer Window: David Beckham extends LA Galaxy stay with new contract

David Beckham is to remain at LA Galaxy after signing a new two-year deal with the club. The former England captain, 36, had been linked with a move to Forest Green Rovers in the English non-league but decided to stay at the team he joined in 2007...
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Funny story: Fearne Cotton to join Radio Bore breakfast programme The Noday Show

Fearne Cotton to join Radio Bore breakfast programme The Noday Show

Fearne Cotton, great-great-great-grand-great-daughter of veteran BBC boss Bilbo Cotton-Socks was today announced as the new presenter of the BBC radio bore brekky proggy, The Noday Show. It is thought 'aunty' removed 127 year old Humphrey Johns fr...
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Funny story: Rupert Murdoch and News International to launch new Sunday newspaper

Rupert Murdoch and News International to launch new Sunday newspaper

After months of speculation it seems like the pip is finally out of the bag. Following the closure of the News of The World in July last year after the phone-hacking scandal, News International look set to press ahead with a replacement Sunday newspa...
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Funny story: Jesus Christ to join judging panel of TV talent show "Britain's got A Superstar"

Jesus Christ to join judging panel of TV talent show "Britain's got A Superstar"

ITV scored one over the BBC today when it announced that the son of God Jesus Christ will join their new Saturday night talent show "Britain's Got A Brand New Superstar" Mr Christ, 2012 of Nazareth, Israel said he was delighted to be joining the c...
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Funny story: Konnie Huq to present new reality show for as yet unnamed tv channel

Konnie Huq to present new reality show for as yet unnamed tv channel

It was leaked on twitter and other social networks late last night that Konnie Huq is to present a new tv show called 'Konnie Kills Cowell' When pressed by journalists outside the Groucho club where she was enjoying a nightcap with hubby Charlie B...
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Funny story: Wikipedia Shutdown Boosts Student Library Visits

Wikipedia Shutdown Boosts Student Library Visits

Libraries at UK universities struggled to keep up with demand yesterday as students turned to traditional methods of research. Young academics found they had to read books for information as online resource, Wikipedia, shut down for the day in pro...
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Funny story: American Idol's Steven Tyler Finally Admits That It's True, He Has Dumped Kate Gosselin

American Idol's Steven Tyler Finally Admits That It's True, He Has Dumped Kate Gosselin

SAVANNAH, Georgia - American Idol Judge Steven Tyler was in town to help judge the auditions of over 10,000 individuals who all insist that they will be the next American Idol. Tyler arrived in the city with the Southern belle's name in grand styl...
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Funny story: Brian Cox In More Hot Water As Town Suffers Black-Out Crime Spree

Brian Cox In More Hot Water As Town Suffers Black-Out Crime Spree

TV space egghead Brian Cox is in more trouble today after a small west country town was devastated by a spate of burglaries last night. The crimes were committed during a town-wide black-out, co-ordinated as part of Cox's three-night BBC2 astronom...
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Funny story: Rick Perry Reveals What Role "Old Sparky" The Electric Chair Will Play In His Presidency

Rick Perry Reveals What Role "Old Sparky" The Electric Chair Will Play In His Presidency

COTTON BALLS, South Carolina - Rick Perry's "Good Old Boy Bus Tour" pulled into the history-rich town of Cotton Balls, South Carolina. The town is noted for being the place where back on March 13, 1863, a regiment of Confederate cavalrymen led by...
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Funny story: Prehistoric Peruvians Popped Popcorn

Prehistoric Peruvians Popped Popcorn

Archaeologists have discovered that an ancient Peruvian tribe living along the Pacific coast was munching on popcorn thousands of years ago. The discovery was made last Thursday by Sir Percival Blick of the British Museum when he raped and pillage...
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Funny story: Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom Want To Adopt The E-Trade Baby

Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom Want To Adopt The E-Trade Baby

DALLAS - The past few months have not been very good for the tallest of the Kardashian sisters, 5-foot-10-inch Khloe, and her husband Dallas Mavericks player Lamar Odom. First in early December Lamar was suddenly traded from the Los Angeles Lakers...
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Funny story: American Idol Kicks Off Season 11 With 10,000 Hopefuls in Savannah, Georgia

American Idol Kicks Off Season 11 With 10,000 Hopefuls in Savannah, Georgia

SAVANNAH, Georgia - Season 11 of American Idol kicked off in the Southern city of Savannah, Georgia. The town nestled on the South Carolina border is noted for its delicious tasting peaches, it deliciously lovely Southern belles, and for being the...
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Funny story: TV Chef Antony Worrall Thompson hires PI

TV Chef Antony Worrall Thompson hires PI

TV Chef Antony Worrall Thompson a star chef on Ready Steady Cook, former I'm a Celebrity get me out of Here contestant and Tesco shoplifter has been trying to get to the bottom of his shoplifting spree. He has said that he will do all in his power...
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Funny story: The Adventure Of The Missing Christmas Goose Pt V; A Festive Shylock Humes Mystery

The Adventure Of The Missing Christmas Goose Pt V; A Festive Shylock Humes Mystery

My friend Shylock Humes, Inspector Stanley Livingstone-Stanley and I were jogging through the suburbs of Norwood in a London growler, bound, as we thought, for the villa of Colonel Clavicord, late of the Bengal Dancers, who was there hosting the Annual Convention of Not Quite Correct Things, for there it was, according to Humes, that we should, at last, attain the longed-for denouement of the Adve...
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