Funny story: Ann Romney to Tax Return Doubters: "Promise Not to Attack Us and Give Us Immunity and We Will Release the Stuff That Mitt Says 'No One Can Ever See' "

Ann Romney to Tax Return Doubters: "Promise Not to Attack Us and Give Us Immunity and We Will Release the Stuff That Mitt Says 'No One Can Ever See' "

Over brunch today with Katie Couric, Ann Romney assured tax return skeptics "there is absolutely mostly nothing of interest most years" in Mitt's tax returns. I say 'Mitt's returns' because we always file separately. Mitt says every good husband files separately for the wives' protection," Ann told Couric. "Other than lines 38 and 44 of most years' 1040 forms and the interest and dividends sche...
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Funny story: Pussy Riot in Jail - Fans Say Free Pussy!

Pussy Riot in Jail - Fans Say Free Pussy!

Moscow - A judge today handed down stiff prison sentences of two years on Friday afternoon for three young women who staged a protest against Vladimir V. Putin in the Cathedral of Christ the Savior last February. They were jailed for hooliganism char...
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Funny story: Students Quit University Over Summer Fiasco

Students Quit University Over Summer Fiasco

CHARLOTTESVILLE, Virginia - A group of over 100 students at the University of Virginia (U.Va.) declared on Friday that they were following the footsteps of several professors who resigned earlier over the university president's "near-death" experienc...
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Funny story: Man In Norway Swerves His Car To Avoid Moose, Hits Bear.

Man In Norway Swerves His Car To Avoid Moose, Hits Bear.

Outside of Oslo Norway a man driving turned his car to avoid hitting a moose without realizing there was a bear just off the road. He hit the bear instead. The man got out of his car to look at the bear to see if he had hurt it and as he opened hi...
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Funny story: Mossad offers to help out in Assange debacle

Mossad offers to help out in Assange debacle

London - Israel's top London-based spook has offered his services to smoke Julian Assange from his spider hole in Ecuador's Knightsbridge embassy. "You wanna have him taken care of, right?" is how Brigadier Shlomo Falaffel put it to Foreign Secret...
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Funny story: Terrifying New Drug Sweeps Country

Terrifying New Drug Sweeps Country

A new sinister drug is sweeping the country, say government and police officials, and it is set to bring despair and misery to the population. The drug has swept in to every facet of our society, from the rich and well-to-do areas of Kent, to the...
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Funny story: Clubbers dance the knight away

Clubbers dance the knight away

A Surrey nobleman had a disappointing night out during his first weekend visit to Manchester. Knight of the Realm Sir Alfred Prufrock ended up on the pavement outside the Toffzarowt Night Club. Sir Alfred went in all dressed up in his fancy ge...
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Funny story: Assange fears indictment over Ecuador's Chevron scam

Assange fears indictment over Ecuador's Chevron scam

Long Island - "He's always been in cahoots with that dumbass Rafael Correa," a leading US taxation consultant commented as a tense standoff between UK police and Ecuador's London embassy escalated today. The former IRS lawyer who has represented a...
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Funny story: Detroit Michigan Expelled From The United States Because "It's Detroit."

Detroit Michigan Expelled From The United States Because "It's Detroit."

As of August 31st of this year Detroit Michigan will be expelled from the United States and forced into exile. Government officials told us yesterday "Well come on. It's Detroit. Nobody wants Detroit." With crimes rates in Motown being the highes...
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Funny story: Three on a Match: Red Sox Owners Sit Together

Three on a Match: Red Sox Owners Sit Together

The Red Sox ownership in a gesture of solidarity sat together at Camden Yards to watch their team not go down for the third time in Baltimore. The three men in white dress shirts (for that comfortable look) sat side-by-side, like Three Amigos read...
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Funny story: Man Utd to represent Holland at the next World Cup!

Man Utd to represent Holland at the next World Cup!

After the sensational signing of Robin van Persie the Dutch Footbal Organisation called, KNVB, have requested that Manchester United represent them in the coming World Cup qualification games and if they qualify, in Brazil in two years. The Dutch...
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Funny story: Early Humans Were Chinese, Scientists Find

Early Humans Were Chinese, Scientists Find

BEIJING, China - Researchers found that human ancestors, although all originating from Africa, were Chinese. A three-month study by the Scientific Research Center of the State Council (SRC) defied the conventional assumption that having ancestral...
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Funny story: The Dread Addiction Of Freeitis Strikes Internet Users Throughout The World

The Dread Addiction Of Freeitis Strikes Internet Users Throughout The World

The advent and incredible popularity of the Internet has resulted in an outbreak of the strange psychological malady known as 'Freeitis'. Freeitis is a recent mental disease in which a person, growing used to getting everything for free on the Internet, ie. free downloads, free music, free videos, etc., then grows to expect everything in life to be for free. Some of those afflicted, usually ha...
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Funny story: Former PM Gordon Brown Timed At Edinburgh Running Faster Than Usain Bolt!

Former PM Gordon Brown Timed At Edinburgh Running Faster Than Usain Bolt!

Following Monday's sprint onto the stage by former Prime Minister Gordon Brown to speak against Scottish independence at the International book festival in Edinburgh, Mr Brown said today that he would only consider running for gold at the 2016 Olympi...
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Funny story: Angry Father Speaks Out Against Huggies Ad Campaign

Angry Father Speaks Out Against Huggies Ad Campaign

Thomas Johnson, a resident of Bartlesville, OK, has decided to voice his opinion in light of the recent Huggies ad campaign depicting loving fathers easily taking care of their children, without the help and supervision of their wives. While some...
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Funny story: Maths A Level student uses Banach-Tarski paradox to prove twice as many students actually got A or A* as passed the exams at the top two grades

Maths A Level student uses Banach-Tarski paradox to prove twice as many students actually got A or A* as passed the exams at the top two grades

Faced with being on the borderline for acceptance to his preferred university place, an eighteen-year-old from Basingstoke has written a letter to the university's Maths department purporting to show that although he was awarded a B grade in Maths, i...
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Funny story: Duke of Edinburgh Warned Carpentry May Be Necessary!

Duke of Edinburgh Warned Carpentry May Be Necessary!

The Duke of Edinburgh has been advised to rest so will have no visitors today after spending 'an uncomfortable night' in his hospital bed. The 91 year old Duke was taken to Aberdeen's Royal Infirmary on Wednesday after his head became trapped betw...
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Funny story: Aliens Abduct Digbeth Resident In Fiat Punto

Aliens Abduct Digbeth Resident In Fiat Punto

Digbeth resident Harry Powell claims to have been abducted by aliens this morning. Mr Powell, 53, was eating cornflakes at his breakfast table, when he claims a small group of extra-terrestrial beings invaded his home and tried to force him in to...
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Funny story: Red Sox Owner John Henry Channels Marie Antoinette

Red Sox Owner John Henry Channels Marie Antoinette

The Boston Red Sox have set a new record for members of media and team whistling past the graveyard. Putting on a happy face has never been quite as ugly as this week when backstabbing players started singing a different tune. They were not such b...
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Funny story: Ryan to Romney: "Can I wear big boy pants now?"

Ryan to Romney: "Can I wear big boy pants now?"

Politico s reporting this afternoon they have the actual recording of Paul Ryan greeting Governor Mitt Romney just before the announcement of his pick as Romney's VP running mate. The campaign is vehemently denying it but the tape proves otherwise. Y...
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Funny story: Assange In Great Escape Bid

Assange In Great Escape Bid

Wikileaks boss and wannabe lothario, Julian Assange, is believed to be going stir crazy, as he has now been holed up in the Ecuadorian embassy for over two months. Embassy sources claim Assange's mood has darkened further since he was granted asyl...
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Funny story: Quentin Kelp MP - Deck Chairs & Blissful Indifference

Quentin Kelp MP - Deck Chairs & Blissful Indifference

Dear Constituents I have had a very busy week and should really take a break away from the pressure of constituency work. But duty calls and, anyway, my wife thinks we should visit her mother in Macclesfield. My impending visit to Greece in time for their next bailout or complete exit from the Euro sounds like my best chance for fun before Parliament re-opens. By the way, explaining whe...
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Funny story: An Elephantine Tale of Woe

An Elephantine Tale of Woe

It was reported recently that Schonbrunn Zoo in Vienna have artificially inseminated a pachyderm with frozen sperm from an African elephant. Sadly, the world seems to have forgotten.....it was 20 years ago today Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play...
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Funny story: Paul Ryan Claims He Has Access To Magic Software That Predicts The Future Safeguarding Your Money

Paul Ryan Claims He Has Access To Magic Software That Predicts The Future Safeguarding Your Money

Congressman R Paul Ryan has come forward and admitted he is in a cooperative that has algorithmic software that predicts the future and safeguards your money just before the proverbial shit hits the fan. Facts have come to light that Vice Presiden...
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Funny story: Brian Urlacher of The Chicago Bears Breaks Up With Jenny McCarthy

Brian Urlacher of The Chicago Bears Breaks Up With Jenny McCarthy

CHICAGO - In what has got to be one of the biggest surprise breakups in recent sports celebrity history, Chicago Bears middle linebacker Brian Urlacher has just kissed Playboy cover girl Jenny McCarthy bye bye. Neither Urlacher, 34, nor McCarthy,...
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Funny story: Rihanna Says That Chris Brown Is Really A Nice Guy

Rihanna Says That Chris Brown Is Really A Nice Guy

LOS ANGELES - Rihanna recently sat down with Carolina Chipotle of Bedroom Pillow Talk and made some startling comments. The Barbados beauty who was assaulted by her then boyfriend Chris Brown in 2009, now says that it was really not Chris's fault.
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Funny story: Anderson Cooper Devastated! Dumps His Cheating Fiancé

Anderson Cooper Devastated! Dumps His Cheating Fiancé

MANHATTAN - Anderson Cooper, host of CNNs Anderson Cooper 360, who just recently came out of the closet, has just found out that his three-year relationship was not the Camelot fairy tale that he thought it was. Cooper's fiancé and boyfriend Ben "...
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Funny story: Slim Everdingle Claims He Smoked Weed With Barack Obama And The Dalai Lama In Lincoln Bedroom

Slim Everdingle Claims He Smoked Weed With Barack Obama And The Dalai Lama In Lincoln Bedroom

BILLINGSGATE POST - Slim Everdingle, lead vocalist of the Whisper Conspiracy, told TMZ that after performing at a Presidential dinner party for the Dalai Lama last year, Jay Carney asked him he would like to join the Dalai and President Obama in the...
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