Funny story: Citing Economic Woes, HELL Will Close It's Doors

Citing Economic Woes, HELL Will Close It's Doors

For over 2000 years it was the "go to" company in post-life housing and employment but today HELL filed for Chapter 11 and announced will soon be closing its doors. Shares of HELL (NASDAQ) plummeted during the day and closed at $1.20, down from $307...
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Funny story: Republicans Attack Obama for Making the World a Safer Place

Republicans Attack Obama for Making the World a Safer Place

Michelle Bachmann joined the other Republican presidential candidates today in condemning Obama for the killing of Libyan leader Moammar Gaddafi. "Do you know how hard it is to find good kowtowing dictators?" said Bachmann, echoing the sentiment...
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Funny story: Simon Cowell announces he is splitting up

Simon Cowell announces he is splitting up

Hot on the heels of the recent announcement by Westlife, it was announced today that Simon Cowell is splitting up. It would appear that Simon says "put your hands on the dial (premium only please)" is to be no more. At a press conference held i...
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Funny story: Animal rights activists eaten by lions

Animal rights activists eaten by lions

Disaster struck at the Lady Gaga Memorial Zoo in Los Angeles today, when a group of animal rights activists were eaten alive by lions. The group call themselves Animals Shouldn't Suffer, Help Uncage Life on Earth (ASSHULE) and they are against what t...
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Funny story: The United States Prepares itself to be Part of the United Kingdom

The United States Prepares itself to be Part of the United Kingdom

Washington, DC - As news today of the decisions top lawyers from both the United States and the United Kingdom reached the White House, the President was apparently relieved to learn that the American Revolution was illegal under British law and ther...
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Funny story: Daleks Kill Gaddafi, Plan To Conquer The World

Daleks Kill Gaddafi, Plan To Conquer The World

Sirte, Libya-- A deadly ambush by Daleks ended the life of Colonel Muammar Gaddafi today. The Daleks shouted "Exterminate, exterminate!" just before blasting him with their death ray. The Daleks then poured blood on Gaddafi's body to make it look l...
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Funny story: "Bwahaha...he was like a son to me!" - Queen Elizabeth on Gaddafi

"Bwahaha...he was like a son to me!" - Queen Elizabeth on Gaddafi

Adelaide - The Queen's tears flowed long and deep today as news of her firstborn's sudden, unexpected RIP flashed up on TV screens everywhere along her final Australian swansong trip. (Enuff of the LSD crap - Ed). Sixty nine years have passed sinc...
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Funny story: Sarah Palin Explains Why She Surprisingly Supports The Occupy Wall Street Protesters

Sarah Palin Explains Why She Surprisingly Supports The Occupy Wall Street Protesters

WASILLA, Alaska - Sarah Palin has stated that she has just about gotten used to the fact that she will not be running in the 2012 GOP presidential race. Palin, recently sat down with GOPicky Magazine's Tabitha Tula Wishywater, and talked about 201...
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Funny story: Man City have a secret weapon for Sunday's derby!

Man City have a secret weapon for Sunday's derby!

The rhetoric bullshit in the build up to Sunday's Manchester derby is gradually gathering pace and now Man City have thrown a "red herring" at United in the form of a "secret weapon"! Jaggedone sent his CIA army (Cockroach Infiltration Army) over...
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Funny story: Gaddafi Lookalike Executed

Gaddafi Lookalike Executed

Colonel Monchengladbach Gaddafi was today celebrating the death of his body double while the real Colonel sipped cocktails on a Tunisian beach. Surrounded by a bevy of his Amazonian bodyguards, clad in fatigue bikinis and stilettos Gaddafi was see...
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Funny story: Dawkins throws his toys out of the pram!

Dawkins throws his toys out of the pram!

Atheist fundamentalist and evolution crackpot Richard Dawkins has finally broken the silence as to why he refuses to debate Professor William Lane Craig. Dawkins claims that it is due to Lane Craigs biblical beliefs! As Lane Craig is a theologian...
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Funny story: Chiswick actor in Gaddafi link

Chiswick actor in Gaddafi link

English thespian Colin Firth is nailed on to win an Oscar for his sensitive portrayal of Colonel Gaddafi. The film, Gaddafi With The Golden Gun, based on the novel by Ian Phlegm, has won rave reviews from critics, even though it has not yet been...
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Funny story: Colonel Gaddafi's Last Words Revealed

Colonel Gaddafi's Last Words Revealed

Colonel Gadaffi's last words have been revealed by the bodyguard who stood by his side as he lay dying in a ditch in Libya. The bodyguard revealed that the Colonel's last words were "I should have married Margaret Thatcher when I had the chance...
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Funny story: The Beginner's Guide Special Edition: Ten Things To Know About Dorking

The Beginner's Guide Special Edition: Ten Things To Know About Dorking

Due to the popularity of our 'Beginner's Guide' series, we have decided to print a selection of periodicals covering more specific subjects. Currently in the making is our 'Season's' selection, and we will also be publishing certain topical items, the first of which is our 'Halloween' special. Look out for these soon. But the first of our Special Edition's is devoted to Dorking. That histori...
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Funny story: Gaddafi is dead; so what!

Gaddafi is dead; so what!

They've got the scoundrel at last, Gaddafi has been shot dead, but then again; so what? He should have been topped years ago by the US, UK, or anybody with a sense of decency in their heads. He was a brutal dictator and he killed and butchered at will. He kept his people brutally under control and was allowed to live the life-style of a multi-billionaire, which he was. The millions he's stas...
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Funny story: Identity Theft Problems? Get A New Identity With Ident-Reinvent!!!

Identity Theft Problems? Get A New Identity With Ident-Reinvent!!!

DO YOU FEAR IDENTITY RIPOFF?   DO YOU FEEL THE GOVERNMENT KNOWS TOO MUCH ABOUT YOU?     DO YOU FEEL THAT HOMELAND SECURITY IS INFRINGING UPON   YOUR RIGHTS OF PRIVACY? SEEK AN ANSWER?    TRY                       IDENT-                               REINVENT Reinvent yourself as a 'South of the Border' illegal immigrant and never worry again!   With our Nuevos Ide...
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Funny story: Pizza know how

Pizza know how

Being a pizza delivery driver used to be an easy job but now the Government wants them to take a test so they know where there going. "I can'ta believe my ears when I hear this! They are delivering the pizza notta picking up the passengers," Marco...
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Funny story: Zanesville, Ohio: Look What's New On The Menu!

Zanesville, Ohio: Look What's New On The Menu!

The local police chief in Zanesville, Ohio, the site of the wild animal escape and slaughter has announced that half of the carcasses have been stolen in the dead of night from the Columbus Zoo morgue. At the present time, no one has been incarcerat...
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Funny story: The Beginner's Guide Part 3: Ten Things To Know About Classical Music

The Beginner's Guide Part 3: Ten Things To Know About Classical Music

Classical music. A gift to the senses to be enjoyed by all? Or the elitist, stuffy domain of people with beards and dinner jackets? With so much history and so many players involved, traversing the auditory minefield that is Classical music can be daunting to the seasoned veteran, let alone the humble beginner! Well not any more! Not with our handy 10 point 'Beginner's Guide'. Sorting...
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Funny story: Illegal gambling? Try Westminster Bridge London!

Illegal gambling? Try Westminster Bridge London!

Sometimes it seems there's Elephants wherever I look - even on my day off! I could not believe my eyes as I walked over Westminster Bridge yesterday, in the heart of London's political district, under the gaze of countless CCTV cameras and (your) god knows what other post-9/11 ultra-sophisticated state-run surveillance spies. As I fought through the crowds I saw SEVEN separate groups of peop...
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Funny story: Gaddafi 'dead' - propofol poisoning suspected

Gaddafi 'dead' - propofol poisoning suspected

Sirte - In what some suspect to be an act of 'assisted suicide' Mad Dog of the Middle East Colonel Gaddafi has reportedly died, clutching a vile (sic) of the hypnotic 'double' agent propofol. Gaddafi, 69, had been holed up at a Butlins-style subte...
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Funny story: Inaudible Loud Dissonance, Part II

Inaudible Loud Dissonance, Part II

The Arab invasions of 7th century into neighboring countries left an irreparable damage and shattered the fabrics of many societies, but the bitter truth remained silent. The wars they fought were mainly political. They were not sincere in their ideology. After each invasion, they took millions of young females as slaves, irrefutable. Of course, nobody expects fighting men of this nature to be...
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Funny story: The Beginner's Guide Part 2: Ten Things To Know About Religion

The Beginner's Guide Part 2: Ten Things To Know About Religion

The second part of our 'Beginners' series looks at the wide, and often confusing, world of religion. From the very dawn of time, man has been seeking the truth's to many of the questions of his own existence. In his quest for knowledge and understanding he often turns to religion. From the all powerful Gods that dictate how this great world was created to codes with which to live ones life b...
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Funny story: Lotto style 'National Hottery' to combat fuel poverty

Lotto style 'National Hottery' to combat fuel poverty

The government plans to launch a new lotto style 'National Hottery' to provide the warmth of hope to those members of the electorate struggling to combat the rising problem of 'fuel poverty', according to a leaked report. The report claims that go...
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Funny story: Police Spy Shock

Police Spy Shock

It is thought the Police may have gone too far in their latest secret spying operation 'Spoof Tory' in which their recruit Adam Werrity moved surreptitiously into the Ministry of Defence and organised the work schedule of the Minister of Defence, Lia...
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Funny story: Occupy Wall St. Too Big to Fail Too Cool to Say Bye-Bye

Occupy Wall St. Too Big to Fail Too Cool to Say Bye-Bye

NEW YORK CITY - The colloquial term infamously used during the global recession is now being applied to the incumbent revolutionary, Occupy Wall St. This means, essentially, that the entire revolution is so interconnected via social network that...
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Funny story: CBS poll suggests 72% Americans love the way Herman Cain says Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac

CBS poll suggests 72% Americans love the way Herman Cain says Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac

NEW YORK CITY - If there's anything a comedian can say about the upcoming presidential elections it's that it's fun watching Republicans spar with each other. Thus far, politicians have managed not to disappoint. Rick Perry always feels he has th...
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Funny story: Hank Williams Jr. asks ESPN for his job back because he misspoke

Hank Williams Jr. asks ESPN for his job back because he misspoke

LOS ANGELES - On Wednesday afternoon ESPN executives sat down with Hank Williams Jr. in what appeared to be a second chance. Witnesses confirmed that Hank was seen going into the building with a shaved face, hair combed, and a subway sandwich in his...
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Funny story: Harry Belafonte's Meditation the New Zumba

Harry Belafonte's Meditation the New Zumba

BAKERSFIELD - Harry Belafonte, an 84 year old singer, actor and activist, famous for the banana boat song, was being interviewed via satellite at a local news station in Bakersfield, California when he nodded off into some other consciousness. Bel...
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Funny story: Obama to have beer with The Kardashians on the White House lawn

Obama to have beer with The Kardashians on the White House lawn

WASHINGTON DC - The minute that President Barack Obama heard that his children were not sleeping by their 8pm curfew because they were watching the reruns of the Kardashians, he cringed and grimaced unfavorably toward the thought of it. He immedi...
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Funny story: CNN anchor Wolf Blitzer jealous that Anderson Cooper better debate host

CNN anchor Wolf Blitzer jealous that Anderson Cooper better debate host

ATLANTA - In what has been deemed the most amusing debates in the history of debates, CNN Anchor Anderson Cooper has been given two thumbs up for his performance not only by his colleagues but by his competition. Even Bill O'Reilly chimed in and...
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Funny story: Baseball Umpires pissed they had to work World Series

Baseball Umpires pissed they had to work World Series

ST LOUIS - Baseball fans had entered the post season with hope that all the playoff games would be the most thrilling post season since two years ago. However, they were beyond disappointed that the two best teams in baseball decided to end their sea...
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Funny story: Hulk Hogan Is Returning To The World of 1, 2, 3

Hulk Hogan Is Returning To The World of 1, 2, 3

PLACENTIA, California - Former wrestling champion Hulk Hogan recently took a tour of the world's largest pickle factory The I Got Your Pickle Factory which is located in Placentia. (Terry) Bollea, Hulk Hogan's real name was really enjoying all of...
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Funny story: Is There Big Time Marital Trouble Brewing In The Mariah Carey-Nick Cannon Household?

Is There Big Time Marital Trouble Brewing In The Mariah Carey-Nick Cannon Household?

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Nick "The Candlestick" Cannon is not very happy these days. The host of America's Got Talent and a stand up comedian in his own right told Jay Leno that there is trouble brewing in his three year marriage. Cannon, 31, who is marr...
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Funny story: Lindsay "But I'm Above The Law" Logan's Probation Is Revoked And The Celebrity Diva Is Taken Into Custody In Handcuffs

Lindsay "But I'm Above The Law" Logan's Probation Is Revoked And The Celebrity Diva Is Taken Into Custody In Handcuffs

LOS ANGELES - It appears that finally one of the judges hearing the many and varied cases of one Lindsay Lohan has had her fill of the way that the little misguided prima donna thinks that she can just do whatever the hell she wants and get away with...
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Funny story: Queen Elizabeth II Will Compete on Dancing With The Stars

Queen Elizabeth II Will Compete on Dancing With The Stars

Everybody's doin' it. Why not Her Majesty? Rumor is that the Queen made DWTS producers agree to several stipulations before she signed her contract. She will keep her crown on (via Super Glue) and will carry her purse during every performance.
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Funny story: Three ways in which you know you'll wreck your relationship

Three ways in which you know you'll wreck your relationship

Things are going well. You like her. She likes you. She spent the night. You called her the requisite six or eight times the following day. But you and I know, you've only got another week to 10 days before you start screwing up. It's inevitable. You won't fight it. First, you'll go ahead and order that food you and I know you should never eat if you're planning on living among people within...
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