Funny story: Hleb joins the Stone Roses and selects himself for champions league final

Hleb joins the Stone Roses and selects himself for champions league final

Arsenal, Barcelona, Stuttgart, Birmingham FC the list goes on for Footballing vagabond Alexander Hleb. The Belarusian midfielder (whose mother was a builder) has been jumping ship ever since leaving the gunners with his pathetic excuse that London...
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Funny story: Supper-Injuctions

Supper-Injuctions

Thise is the Laytexte Newe's Laitexet's bi'e Investitgratin'e Rep-otre We have of bine hearde of that theryr has of bin many storeiys what are of aboute theses supere-injuctshns what are of been happent to all suche premire legge foutballer ekc ekcet. What of is hase bine cafortin wiyth modiles gurl. Hore iss ite? Wee hav of evindense of otherr doin's ,like , whot is "suoepur-injutions"...
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Funny story: New Study Shows American Housewives Vastly Over Paid

New Study Shows American Housewives Vastly Over Paid

JOURNAL OF HOUSEHOLD FINANCE: Last week the results of a study that evaluated what a "full-time stay-at-home" mother should make if she were paid for all her labor was published. The study estimated that by calculating the earning power of the 1...
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Funny story: Scotty McCreery Has Proven That America Has A Problem

Scotty McCreery Has Proven That America Has A Problem

Scotty McCreery has shocked the world by winning the American Idol competition. Viewers in Britain watched in a state of incredulity as his name was read out as the winner. They were left wondering what had happened. How can a man who sing...
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Funny story: Ivan Beenrippedoff Could Replace Ballmer : Bill Gates

Ivan Beenrippedoff Could Replace Ballmer : Bill Gates

Las Vegas (AP) Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates has indicated disgruntled parent Ivan Beenrippedoff is to replace failed actor Steve Ballmer as CEO of Microsoft. Ivan Beenrippedoff made headlines earlier in the week after requesting $190 million (Aus...
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Funny story: Ratko Mladic Unbelievable Hiding Place Revealed

Ratko Mladic Unbelievable Hiding Place Revealed

The unusual hiding place of Ratko Mladic has tonight been revealed for the very first time. It is believed that Ratko was able to evade capture because no one could understand how anyone could possibly survive in the strange place he chose to live...
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Funny story: Shearer Scandal Rocks BBC

Shearer Scandal Rocks BBC

A former BBC employee has shocked the footballing world by claiming that he once saw football pundit Alan Shearer wearing a shirt that didn't have any of these stupid epaulettes on the shoulders. Lesley Agnew, who was a production assistant on BBC...
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Funny story: Parliament To Host Wedding Receptions

Parliament To Host Wedding Receptions

Plans are afoot to hire the Palace of Westminster out for wedding receptions and other functions. The Commons Administration Committee are considering making the historic Westminster Hall available for the princely fee of £25,000 in an attempt to...
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Funny story: More Upheaval at Ibrox

More Upheaval at Ibrox

New Rangers owner Craig Whyte continued his purge of the Ibrox staff with 3 new appointments today. Hot on the heels of the departure of chairman Alastair Johnston and director Paul Murray, even more changes were effected by the new regime. Fir...
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Funny story: Who put the might in Marmite?

Who put the might in Marmite?

Who put the "might" in Marmite? By Rob Barratt The sandwich beast A feast of yeast Historic remnant of the brewer A staple of the English po-or Extracted now from Danish shelves Spread the word, assert yourselves But don't break down as a knackered car might And don't let the Danes get rid of Marmite Some say that you must love or hate it It's not like cheese, you just can't grate i...
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Funny story: Hines Ward Wins Dancing With The Stars With Risky 'Fracture Kym Johnson's Neck' Routine.

Hines Ward Wins Dancing With The Stars With Risky 'Fracture Kym Johnson's Neck' Routine.

Pittsburgh Steelers' alligator-arming wide receiver Hines Ward and professional dancer Kym Johnson were announced as the season 47 winner of ABC's Dancing With The Stars, and the couple believe that it was a shocking dance maneuver that sealed their...
View 'Hines Ward Wins Dancing With The Stars With Risky 'Fracture Kym Johnson's Neck' Routine.'
Funny story: Giant tortoise "shell shocked" to be on trial

Giant tortoise "shell shocked" to be on trial

A giant tortoise named Gladys has appeared on trial in the Hague for war crimes. The tortoise, now aged 225 years old and restricted to a wheelchair, could not speak to record her name. It is thought she might only live a few more decades and may not...
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Funny story: Marmite Row Spreads To Tetley's Brewery Closure: Anti-Dane Feeling Grows

Marmite Row Spreads To Tetley's Brewery Closure: Anti-Dane Feeling Grows

News that an MP has tabled an Early Day Motion condemning the closure of Leeds's Tetley brewery has fuelled the growing anti-Dane mood in the UK. As we reported yesterday, the Danish government's decision to ban the sale of Marmite in the country...
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Funny story: Network was livid as pint-pot sized talent Cheryl Cole revealed to be Simon Cowell's daughter!

Network was livid as pint-pot sized talent Cheryl Cole revealed to be Simon Cowell's daughter!

Los Angeles - Psycho (sic) TV bosses learned about the nepotism when secret swabs matched the two's DNA. But it was Paula Abdul's dubbing of Cheryl as 'a freakshow poison dwarf' that finally did for the 5ft 2ins non-entity. This morning nation...
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Funny story: Illinois Flood Warning As Oprah Bows Out

Illinois Flood Warning As Oprah Bows Out

The Federal Emergency Management Agency has issued a flood alert for Chicago and most of Illinois state in the wake of the final Oprah Winfrey chat show on Wednesday. FEMA Director William Fugate issued the warning after a massive outpouring of gr...
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Funny story: Shock horror on wedding night

Shock horror on wedding night

Direct from our weeki leeks royal correspondent comes the startling news of the virgin prince's shocking surprise when he dropped his hand on common Kate for the first time after the wedding and came up with a fistful of raw meat. The truth is she...
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Funny story: First Test Crowd "Hilariously" Disappointing

First Test Crowd "Hilariously" Disappointing

The crowd and the weather have been two major disappointments of the opening test against Sri Lanka at Cardiff today. First, although Cardiff hadn't seen rain for days, the heavens opened over Sophia Gardens this morning and play was delayed until...
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Funny story: SPL Keen To Introduce British League Cup

SPL Keen To Introduce British League Cup

As part of its radical new plan to reorganise Scottish football, the SPL has proposed the reintroduction of a cross border cup tournament. SPL chief executive Neil Lancaster is keen to re-establish a cup competition between Scottish and English cl...
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Funny story: Burka wearers surveyed

Burka wearers surveyed

Fashion magazine Dazzle (not to be confused with Razzle) has interviewed British women who wear burkas to try to find out the reasons why they cover themselves in such an unusual item of clothing. The most popular response, with a whopping 34%, wa...
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Funny story: Pippa Middleton, Victoria Beckham, Coleen Rooney, Katie Price Plan Wembley Shocker For Shakira, Imogen Thomas And Pep Guardiola

Pippa Middleton, Victoria Beckham, Coleen Rooney, Katie Price Plan Wembley Shocker For Shakira, Imogen Thomas And Pep Guardiola

As rumours surface that Shakira and Imogen Thomas will be supporting Barcelona in Saturday's Champions League Final, with the whole hearted endorsement of Barca coach, Pep Guardiola, Brit icons, Pippa Middleton (of Pippawatch fame) Victoria Beckham,...
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Funny story: Sir Jimmy Savile Completes London Marathon Only 6 Years Behind The Pace!

Sir Jimmy Savile Completes London Marathon Only 6 Years Behind The Pace!

Cigar-chuffing, big chair-sitting and former top Radio 1 DJ, Sir Jimmy Savile, has finally crossed the finishing line on London's Mall, following his completion of the London Marathon 2005! Crowds of at one point, up to two, turned out to see the...
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Funny story: Tevez claims Messi is shorter than Maradona.

Tevez claims Messi is shorter than Maradona.

Below average height Carlos Tevez (5ft8") has today claimed in a national newspaper that Lionel Messi (3ft7") is even shorter than Diego Maradona (5ft5"). The Manchester Argie has also claimed that tiny midget Messi could well be the shortest foo...
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Funny story: Bristol "The Pistol" Palin Admits That Her And Fellow Dancing With The Stars Contestant Kyle "Tootsie Roll" Massey Are A 'Hot and Steamy' Item

Bristol "The Pistol" Palin Admits That Her And Fellow Dancing With The Stars Contestant Kyle "Tootsie Roll" Massey Are A 'Hot and Steamy' Item

MARICOPA, Arizona - By all first-hand accounts it does appear that Sarah Louise Palin is reportedly not a happy (Alaskan) camper at the moment. It seems that "Snowflake" has just learned that her 20-year-old daughter Bristol is dating star and fel...
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Funny story: Police use Helicopter to Save Cat from Mistreatment

Police use Helicopter to Save Cat from Mistreatment

A Police helicopter that happened to be airborne in Oxfordshire was sent to deal with an incident of a 15 year old lad pulling the tail of a cat. Owner, Marge Marks, phoned the police about her cat's tail being pulled by the youngster and the deci...
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Funny story: As Cheryl Cole Row Escalates Research Reveals That 95% Of Britons Don't Understand American Accents

As Cheryl Cole Row Escalates Research Reveals That 95% Of Britons Don't Understand American Accents

Following the shock news that Geordie love Goddess, Cheryl Cole has been dropped from American X Factor because most of the US viewers find her Geordie accent indecipherable, a trans-Atlantic internet feud has broken out, with Brits saying that quite...
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Funny story: Rush Limbaugh Addresses The Sports Reports That He Is Buying The Minnesota Vikings

Rush Limbaugh Addresses The Sports Reports That He Is Buying The Minnesota Vikings

MINNEAPOLIS - Rush Limbaugh was in town visiting his old friend Governor Tim Pawlenty when he was asked about the sports reports that he is seeking to purchase the NFL's Minnesota Vikings. El Rusho, took a puff of his 12-inch cigar, and remarked that ever since last year when he tried to buy the St. Louis Rams everyone keeps asking him if he is still looking to buy a professional football team.
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Funny story: London Beer Microbrewer Considers Buyout Offer from Heinekin

London Beer Microbrewer Considers Buyout Offer from Heinekin

Suburban London brewer Alistair Skoobing, famous for his specialty blended beers, is reportedly entertaining the acceptance of an attractive purchase agreement from European brewing giant, Heinekin. Winning multiple microbrew categories at compe...
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Funny story: Victoria's Secret Closes Gingrich Account!

Victoria's Secret Closes Gingrich Account!

Victoria's Secret issued a brief statement this morning saying that the account of Newt Gingrich has been closed. "We do not ordinarily comment on this type of decision," said a spokesman, "but in this case and because of the prominence of the individual involved, we will elaborate to a small degree. Mr. Gingrich's account is overdue in the amount of $125,000 and although this is not excessiv...
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Funny story: All Change At American X Factor As Cheryl Cole Is Fired And Pippa Middleton Is Hired!

All Change At American X Factor As Cheryl Cole Is Fired And Pippa Middleton Is Hired!

The storm surrounding the sensational sacking of Cheryl Cole from American X Factor shows no signs of abating this morning, with the rumour mill working overtime processing and devouring snippet after snippet concerning the amazing axeing of the UK's...
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Funny story: Gaddafi's New Hat Modeled from Johnny Depp's Pirate Wardrobe

Gaddafi's New Hat Modeled from Johnny Depp's Pirate Wardrobe

Sporting attractive new headwear, Colonel Gaddafi was seen at a press conference yesterday wearing a bejeweled red bandanna, that looked suspiciously like the one worn in the latest Pirates of the Caribbean movie by Johnny Depp. While busy aski...
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Funny story: Ryan Giggs May Be Pulled Off, Along With Chicharito

Ryan Giggs May Be Pulled Off, Along With Chicharito

Ahead of Manchester United's showcase Champions League Final against Barcelona at Wembley on Saturday, Old Trafford based sources have indicated that at some stage in the game, Ryan Giggs and Chicharito may well be pulled off. One insider said tha...
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Funny story: Obama & Cameron Pledge to Reopen World Cup Negotiations in Wake of New FIFA Scandal!

Obama & Cameron Pledge to Reopen World Cup Negotiations in Wake of New FIFA Scandal!

Just weeks before the FIFA convenes to vote for a new president, alleged charges of bribery have emerged over the awarding of the 2018 & 2022 world cup locations. The startling (ha!) charges alleging bribes were offered consisting of $40,000...
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Funny story: Manchester United stars to be new Ant and Dec

Manchester United stars to be new Ant and Dec

Ex Manchester United aces Gary and Phil Neville are to be the new Ant and Dec. The popular and charismatic footballers are being groomed to host 'I Am a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here' A media PR spokesperson told reporters: "It is a winnin...
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Funny story: Curdsville Wisconsin Part 2: Giving Edna the Boot

Curdsville Wisconsin Part 2: Giving Edna the Boot

Well Hey There and Howdy, Friends. We're still a bit soggy here on the farm this week, and there are parts of the back 40 where I can't step out of the trusty John Deere lest I find myself sunk up to my kneecaps in mud. Of course, it ain't just mud. Edna reminded me back in February that we needed to fertilize that plot of land this year and I'd been rather generous on the manure spread...
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Funny story: Curdsville Wisconsin Part 1: Making them Vegans Happy

Curdsville Wisconsin Part 1: Making them Vegans Happy

Vegans and Cheese This week at the Curdsville Dairy Farm, we tried to pacify all those Vegan protesters we caught stomping around our Alfalfa fields last week, by agreeing to mix tofu curds in with some of our best Colby cheese. We figured we might open up a whole new cheese market maybe, for folks who want to claim they're Vegans, but who still wear leather shoes, and generously butter their...
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Funny story: EatEnders "star" Cheryl Fergison has married a lovely bunch of coconuts

EatEnders "star" Cheryl Fergison has married a lovely bunch of coconuts

Cheryl Fergison, who plays Eastender's Heather Trott has married her Moroccan toyboy in a secret ceremony in the country. Neighbours say that Heather is fitting in really well, but that the goat population suffers fantastic losses each time she ar...
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Funny story: Michelle ditches wedding ring for massive emerald knuckleduster

Michelle ditches wedding ring for massive emerald knuckleduster

London - "It's often the sign of a disreputable neighborhood," security sources warned today, "when a woman feels the need to arm herself with such a large chunk of hardware!" At the American ambassador's residence in Regent's Park last night Firs...
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Funny story: LSE Fees Announcement Welcomed By Top Academic

LSE Fees Announcement Welcomed By Top Academic

The London School Of Economics has become the first elite university to announce that it will charge less than £9,000 in fees. From the next academic year undergraduates at the LSE will be charged £8,500, a move that the university claims sends "a...
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Funny story: Sarah Palin Says: I Will Only Run If America Truly Wants Me

Sarah Palin Says: I Will Only Run If America Truly Wants Me

Sarah Palin stepped out of her new mansion in a Phoenix subdivision yesterday, accompanied by her 40 new staffers. In her yard is a newly erected podium complete with American flag, weather proof microphone and teleprompter. Still, the former Governo...
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Funny story: Scotty McCreery Beats Lauren Alaina To Win The $1 Million 'American Idol' First Place Prize

Scotty McCreery Beats Lauren Alaina To Win The $1 Million 'American Idol' First Place Prize

HOLLYWOOD - One of the nicest contestants to ever appear on American Idol has been chosen as the 2011 American Idol winner. Scotty "The Voice" McCreery, 17, of Garner, North Carolina beat out Lauren "Peaches" Alaina, 16, of Rossville, Georgia.
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Funny story: Captain James Cook's travels were a waste of time

Captain James Cook's travels were a waste of time

It seems that famous exploring Yorkshireman Captain James Cook could have saved himself 11 years of wasted time if he had taken a different direction. Revelations have aspired from the finding of Captain Cooks personal diary and some of his crews writings were found in the garden of a semi -detached bungalow in Marton, Middlesbrough. It turns out that the writings could reshape the achieveme...
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Funny story: Simon Cowell Drops A Bombshell: American 'X-Factor' Is Getting Rid of The Sexually Sultry Cheryl Cole

Simon Cowell Drops A Bombshell: American 'X-Factor' Is Getting Rid of The Sexually Sultry Cheryl Cole

HOLLYWOOD - Just one short month ago Simon Cowell, aka "The Sultan of Sarcasm" was singing the praises of English singer Cheryl Cole whom he had hand picked to be one of the judges on his American version of X-Factor. Cowell informed Pico de Gallo...
View 'Simon Cowell Drops A Bombshell: American 'X-Factor' Is Getting Rid of The Sexually Sultry Cheryl Cole'
Funny story: Michael Jackson's statue wants a transfer to Man United

Michael Jackson's statue wants a transfer to Man United

Word on the streets of London is that the Michael Jackson statue at Fulham Football Clud has got itchy feet. This bizarre revelation has arrived approximately 25 miles north of Fulham from a 58 year physic clairvoyant woman in Luton, Bedfordshire.
View 'Michael Jackson's statue wants a transfer to Man United'
Funny story: Shania Twain has her devoted fan arrested

Shania Twain has her devoted fan arrested

A dedicated fan who purchased over twenty thousand dollars worth of Shania Twain's music and accessories was arrested for attending her introduction into the Canadian Music Hall of Fame at the Juno Awards in Toronto. The man is a 50-year-old Otta...
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Funny story: New Sleep Product Helps the US Economy

New Sleep Product Helps the US Economy

Union City NJ: The Prometheus Pharmaceutical Company (PPC) announced today that a breakthrough in sleep medication had occurred. A new sleep product, fortified with vitamins, will soon be on the over-the-counter market. PPC's lead project research...
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Funny story: Irish Say Enough Already; Have Had It with Famous Visitors

Irish Say Enough Already; Have Had It with Famous Visitors

Still reeling from the recent visits of Queen Elizabeth II as well as U.S. President Barack Obama, Irish folks are exhausted and desperately need a respite. The visits were lovely while they lasted but thankfully they are now over. Finito! Ev...
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Funny story: Isle of Wight residents planning an IOWL 'Isle of Wight League' football competition for next season

Isle of Wight residents planning an IOWL 'Isle of Wight League' football competition for next season

Residents of The Isle of Wight believe they have enough talented football players to start a 'League of their own' and therefore interested residents across he Isle are busy organizing try-outs for teams. Mayors of each village do admit that they...
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53
13th
38
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36
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35
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39
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