Funny story: A Charabanc Trip With Major And Mrs Percy Part 3 - Lovers Leap At Lippington Mount

A Charabanc Trip With Major And Mrs Percy Part 3 - Lovers Leap At Lippington Mount

The charabanc, unsullied by the blight of airborne pollen, the pestilence of squashed insects, or the perils of airborne industrial soot particles, weaves its way majestically from the gloomy depression that is the village of Lower Doom, with its slate grey stone buildings, its lack of meaningful sunlight, and its dour residents, headed for the Lovers Leap at Lippington Mount. The charabanc's i...
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Funny story: Pippa Middleton's "Pert Posterior Plan" US Publishing Deal

Pippa Middleton's "Pert Posterior Plan" US Publishing Deal

Word in exclusive circles has it that there's a hot book deal in the offing for Pippa Middleton, the UK's top posh totty hot property. For we have it on the authority of no less an authority than the authority of our old friend and Hollywood oracle,...
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Funny story: Anthropologist Discovers Primitive Man Could Hover While Having Sex With Giant Hummingbirds

Anthropologist Discovers Primitive Man Could Hover While Having Sex With Giant Hummingbirds

ANTHROPOLOGY TODAY: The recent discovery of the fossified remains of what anthropologists believe to be the missing link in the evolutionary process of homo sapiens, was revealed today by none other than Dr. Viscount Billingsgate. While visiting...
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Funny story: Donald Trump Officially Announces He Is Not Running For President And You Won't Believe The Reason Why

Donald Trump Officially Announces He Is Not Running For President And You Won't Believe The Reason Why

MANHATTAN - Billionaire Donald Trump, who stars in the NBC hit reality show Celebrity Apprentice, sat in his Trump Towers office gazing intently out the window towards Central Park. He remarked to Tilapia Frisbee of The Right Coast Illustrated Rev...
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Funny story: The CEO of The NBA Phoenix Suns Rick Welts Comes Out of The Closet - Denies He Wants To Rename The Team The Huns

The CEO of The NBA Phoenix Suns Rick Welts Comes Out of The Closet - Denies He Wants To Rename The Team The Huns

PHOENIX - The land of Governor Jan "The Man" Brewer and Sheriff Joe "Pinky" Arpaio is now also the land of Rick "The Gay CEO" Welts. Welts recently met with NBA Commissioner David Stern at a Starbucks and told him about his sexual orientation. Stern, sternly asked if he was sure. Welts replied that he was as sure as he could possibly be sure and not be deemed to be unsure. Stern shook hi...
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Funny story: More Bad News On Eurovision Front

More Bad News On Eurovision Front

Hot on the heels of Blue's disappointing showing in the 2011 Eurovision Song Contest , the UK entertainment industry has been hit by more bad news. Following the band's 11th place finish and taking into account the lowly positions of UK entries ov...
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Funny story: Louisiana Floods May Be Al Qaeda Plot

Louisiana Floods May Be Al Qaeda Plot

The Department Of Homeland Security is investigating claims that the dangerously high levels along the Mississippi river is part of an Al Qaeda plot to destroy the economies of Louisiana and neighbouring states. The CIA has been monitoring recent...
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Funny story: Sex Psychologist Turns To Football

Sex Psychologist Turns To Football

In 1995, eminent American sex psychologist Burt Inglebrat wrote the award winning "Five Minutes Of Pleasure : A Lifetime of Commitment, a treatise on how a brief carnal event can lead to decades of maternal or paternal responsibility. Inglebrat ha...
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Funny story: Space Shuttle Launches Safely, Reports Disappointed CNN, MSNBC.

Space Shuttle Launches Safely, Reports Disappointed CNN, MSNBC.

Flight Commander Mark Kelly blasted Space Shuttle Endeavour into space this morning without incident, disappointing the major TV news agencies, which already started making title cards and recording cello music for the special "Tragedy For Endeavour"...
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Funny story: Yankees' Posada Out Of Time-Out Chair, Expected To Regain Big Wheel Privileges Soon.

Yankees' Posada Out Of Time-Out Chair, Expected To Regain Big Wheel Privileges Soon.

39-year-old possible Hall Of Fame catcher and designated hitter Jorge Pasada is expected to be out of Time-Out by this afternoon, and has taken great strides toward being allowed to ride his Big Wheel in the driveway, say Yankees officials. In case...
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Funny story: Woman Begs Council To Rehouse Her Family Because House Is Too Big

Woman Begs Council To Rehouse Her Family Because House Is Too Big

A woman has requested the borough of Kensington and Chelsea to rehouse her and her family because the house is too big. Elizabeth Windsor and her husband Phillip are said to be shagged out just getting to the breakfast table in the mornings. They are...
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Funny story: Howard Webb is a very naughty boy!

Howard Webb is a very naughty boy!

After a performance hailed by Graham Poll as 'inciteful and the reason why we have the Respect campaign', newly re-crowned King Kenny begged to differ. Despite some of his GlaScouser accent forcing much to be lost in translation, it was obvious to al...
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Funny story: Corinthian Casuals Handed Fair Play Europa League Spot

Corinthian Casuals Handed Fair Play Europa League Spot

Corinthian Casuals will represent England in the first qualifying round of next season's Europa League. The amateur outfit have benefited from their good behaviour on the pitch. They have never had a player booked or sent off. Indeed it has been over...
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Funny story: Avram Grant Gets His Hammers In A Twist

Avram Grant Gets His Hammers In A Twist

Avram Grant was last night embroiled in a legal battle the likes of which this country has never seen. After West Ham's owner's David Short-And-Stubby and David Albino-Malnourished-Lion-Face made clear to Grant that his tenure had come to an end,...
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Funny story: A Charabanc Trip With Major And Mrs Percy Part 2 - The Caves Of Doom At Lower Doom

A Charabanc Trip With Major And Mrs Percy Part 2 - The Caves Of Doom At Lower Doom

Outside the newsagent's shop Major Percy is becoming increasingly agitated, as the charabanc appears to be running late. The time is eleven am and forty-three seconds precisely. The Major checks his wristwatch and scowls. "It's late," he says. "Yes dear," says Mrs Percy. "I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation." "Are you absolutely certain that you synchronised our watches pr...
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Funny story: West Ham Olympic

West Ham Olympic

Marking a change of fortune and the experience of a new Manager and a new league West Ham are celebrating their move to the Olympic Stadium after the Olympic Games by renaming the club West Ham Olympic (W.H.O.) So there is no confusion with the Wo...
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Funny story: BNP claim that losing their seats in Stoke cost Stoke City the FA cup

BNP claim that losing their seats in Stoke cost Stoke City the FA cup

The unseated members of the BNP who lost in the recent local elections have claimed that had they not been voted out of office, Stoke City Football Club would have won the F A Cup against Manchester City. Leader of the group, Noel Himmler said tha...
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Funny story: Schoolboy in skirt says his protest was all a sham

Schoolboy in skirt says his protest was all a sham

A 12-year-old boy, known only as "A boy" (he said he will issue a super ink-junction - i.e. stuff our heads in the ink well - if we mention his name or where his school is) who wore a skirt in class and who originally said he did it as a protest agai...
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Funny story: Evolutionists and the Junk DNA row!

Evolutionists and the Junk DNA row!

Idiot evolutionists are again clambering through the remains of yet another crumbling mountain of evidence! The row seems to be over what is popularly known as 'junk DNA'. Evolutionists want to imagine that as much as 98.5% of the human genome is in fact left over garbage from our ancestors. Unfortunately, those pesky scientists have spoilt the party and are increasingly finding out that in fac...
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Funny story: US stripper, Chelsea, has boobs that weigh more than Victoria Beckham!

US stripper, Chelsea, has boobs that weigh more than Victoria Beckham!

A US stripper called Chelsea (no relation to the footie club who "boobed" it against United) has the biggest boobs on the planet and they even weigh more than that fab stick insect called Victoria Beckham. She paraded them on the morning TV show w...
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Funny story: New Injury to Tiger Woods May End Career Leading to Early Retirement at Stud Farm!

New Injury to Tiger Woods May End Career Leading to Early Retirement at Stud Farm!

With ailing love machine Tiger Woods forced to withdraw from last weekend's TPC Sawgrass golf Championship with his 4th injury to a fragile fetlock, syndicate owners are now considering putting him out to stud earlier than predicted in order to r...
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Funny story: Curse of Friday-The-13th as cruise ship named after royal newlyweds sees engine explode

Curse of Friday-The-13th as cruise ship named after royal newlyweds sees engine explode

Baltic Sea - "OMG! Tell me this isn't an omen!" a Clarence House flunkey wailed as news that a passenger cruise liner named The Devil And Kate was being towed to port following a massive internal power failure. The 856-cabin vessel, originally the...
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Funny story: Government Crackdown on Children's Holidays!

Government Crackdown on Children's Holidays!

Since 2002 when it became illegal for parents to take their children on holiday during school term time the government estimate some 46% of British parents have broken that law. In theory parents risk being fined up to £2500 for committing the offen...
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Funny story: Traffic Information Around Dublin During The Queens Visit

Traffic Information Around Dublin During The Queens Visit

As you travel around Dublin City centre in the coming days you may notice that all is not what you though it was. One may notice that there is little or no suitable parking. Regular drivers will be aware of how unusual this is as normally one can park ones car any where with reckless abandonment in Dublin. The following parking arrangements have being put in place over the next few days the pol...
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Funny story: Celebrity Apprentice: Donald Trump Fires Lil Jon and Meat Loaf

Celebrity Apprentice: Donald Trump Fires Lil Jon and Meat Loaf

NEW YORK CITY - In the latest edition of Celebrity Apprentice, Donald Trump took the remaining four contestants and quickly fired half of them. Hip hop rap singer Lil Jon, who has dreadlocks that go down to his knees, was told by the "Donald" that...
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Funny story: A Charabanc Trip With Major And Mrs Percy

A Charabanc Trip With Major And Mrs Percy

There can't be many better things to do on a sunny summer day in England than to air out one's plus fours, polish up the old brogues, trim the moustache, wipe one's monocle, and take the good lady wife on a traditional charabanc trip for the day. As Major and Mrs Percy so sportingly describe herein, as they embark upon a charabanc tour, and invite all the lovely readers along to share in, and p...
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Funny story: Oil Execs to Congress: "Let Them Eat Cake, Ride Their Bicycles!"

Oil Execs to Congress: "Let Them Eat Cake, Ride Their Bicycles!"

The big oil executives came to Congress this last week and told them to "stick it!" As one executive put it, "Let them eat cake and if they can't afford a few dollars for gas they can ride their bicycles to the welfare office. Most of these people d...
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Funny story: Avram Grant sacked for wearing fishnets.

Avram Grant sacked for wearing fishnets.

West Ham have sacked manager Avram Grant after he was caught wearing fishnets at the Wigan game. Avram's excuse about the chilly northern wind did not go down well with the Hammers' diehards.. "The late great Sir Bobby Moore would be turning in h...
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Funny story: Fake Kermit Attempts to Undermine Frog's Presidential Leap

Fake Kermit Attempts to Undermine Frog's Presidential Leap

A wolfish grin appeared on the face of a conspiratorial Obhama aide as he saw his story undermining Frog's Presidential chances getting into the columns of highly esteemed "news" source TheSpoof.com. This augurs in a below the belt contest for the...
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Funny story: HRH Phil The Greek Mourns Loss Of Navy Career

HRH Phil The Greek Mourns Loss Of Navy Career

On the eve of his 90th Birthday, HRH Prince Philip has spoken of his sadness at having to prematurely end his navy career. In 1947 he married the then Princess Elizabeth, not knowing that he would have to sacrifice his own career to focus on the supe...
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Funny story: Dannii Minogue Devastated Over Being Fired From 'X-Factor'

Dannii Minogue Devastated Over Being Fired From 'X-Factor'

LONDON - This years X-Factor will hardly be recognizable. Three of the four judges are gone including Simon Cowell, Cheryl Cole, and now Dannii Minogue. Simon "The Sultan of Sarcasm" Cowell left to return to America where he is putting the finishi...
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Funny story: Killie Keeper To Quit After Rangers Hammering

Killie Keeper To Quit After Rangers Hammering

Kilmarnock keeper Cammie Bell has threatened to quit the game after the 5-1 home thrashing at the hands of SPL champions Rangers. Bell admitted at the end of the match at Rugby Park that the whole experience had been humiliating and that he is ser...
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Funny story: Fergie Praises Rooney's Calmness Under Pressure

Fergie Praises Rooney's Calmness Under Pressure

An ecstatic Sir Alex Ferguson hailed Wayne Rooney after the Scouser kept his cool to slot home the penalty that clinched the Premiership title for Man Utd. Fergie couldn't praise the sometimes troubled striker enough after the 1-1 draw with Blackb...
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Funny story: Pippa Middleton Angrily Denounces The Rumors That She Had Breast Augmentation Surgery

Pippa Middleton Angrily Denounces The Rumors That She Had Breast Augmentation Surgery

LONDON - It is generally accepted now by most world wide media publications that Pippa Middleton is officially the most famous Pippa in history along with the most famous Middleton in history. In the world of socialites, the 27-year-old native of...
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Funny story: Angelina Jolie Explains The Symbolism Behind Her Latest 'Crotch Region' Tattoo

Angelina Jolie Explains The Symbolism Behind Her Latest 'Crotch Region' Tattoo

PROVENCE, France - Angelina Jolie, half of the infamous Brangelina duo, proudly talked about her latest tattoo. Jolie was asked what the new tattoo which she says is a Gothic looking numeral "7" actually represents. She giggled and told Gigi de...
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Funny story: Ray J Goes From Kim Kardashian To Skeletor's Mom, Danielle Staub

Ray J Goes From Kim Kardashian To Skeletor's Mom, Danielle Staub

Third-tier rapper Ray J. has admitted to sampling both ends of the Poon-spectrum, after it was discovered that he is now sliding the sausage into waxy meathole Danielle Staub. Ray J., 30, who rose to fame via his sex tape with Celebutard Kim Kardashian, and Real Housewives of New Jersey cast-member Staub, 62 --who also victimized pornwatchers with her own hideous sex tape, were spotted canood...
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Funny story: West Ham Reject Avram Grant To Be Catapulted Into Space

West Ham Reject Avram Grant To Be Catapulted Into Space

Avram Grant, the ex-manager of Premier League West Ham United, who were yesterday relegated to the Championship after a 3-2 defeat at Wigan, is to be sent hurtling into space by Hammers fans who are just about sick and tired of his pathetic excuses.
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Funny story: Queen Elizabeth II May be Related to Johnny Depp, Gets Movie Role as Pirate

Queen Elizabeth II May be Related to Johnny Depp, Gets Movie Role as Pirate

As soon as she heard experts say that she and Depp may be 20th cousins, Her Majesty took immediate action. Her fashion consultants were called in and ordered to design an array of Royal eye patches. "And throw out those flowery hats," the Quee...
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Funny story: Environmentalist Discovers Brown Energy

Environmentalist Discovers Brown Energy

Brownsville TX: A retired university professor of environmentalism claims to have invented the S**t to Energy Converter, a breakthrough in cheap renewable energy generation. Today's environmentalists keep talking about this going green s**t, but t...
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