Funny story: President Obama Declares War On Iraq War Veterans: No Ticker-Tape Parade In NYC

President Obama Declares War On Iraq War Veterans: No Ticker-Tape Parade In NYC

I guess that President Obama decided that fickle Americans won't be seeing a ticker-tape parade in New York City celebrating our heroes returning from the nine year old campaign in Iraq. And he never said 'well done' and he never said 'we won'. It won't be the first time that warriors coming back home from an unpopular war were deemed unworthy of a parade. Vietnam war veterans invited ridicul...
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Funny story: Emma Watson really struggles with hiding her camel toe

Emma Watson really struggles with hiding her camel toe

No longer a giddy young teenager in ponytails riding high on the success of Harry Potter, Emma Watson is now a fine young lady in her early twenties giddily riding high on the success of Harry Potter. However, now that she is that little bit older...
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Funny story: Jumpers in Cardigan cause drivers to pullover

Jumpers in Cardigan cause drivers to pullover

A sudden spate in suicides in Cardigan, Wales, has caused traffic chaos over the holiday period. "We cannot identify a reason for these sudden suicides," said Cardigan police inspector John Barnaby. "It's not the first time there has been a suicid...
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Funny story: The Los Angeles Lakers Start Off the NBA Season at 0-2, Kobe Bryant Asks To Be Traded

The Los Angeles Lakers Start Off the NBA Season at 0-2, Kobe Bryant Asks To Be Traded

LOS ANGELES - The once high-flying Lakers of Los Angeles seem to have left with the dreaded Santa Ana Winds. The Lakers of today are certainly not the Lakers of old when they had the likes of Kobe Bryant Shaquille O'Neal, Derek Fisher, Lamar Odom...
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Funny story: Bank of England Funds Diverted to Charity

Bank of England Funds Diverted to Charity

Rumours that the Bank of England has taken to the Christmas spirit and donated its entire funds to charity are turning out to be partly true. Robin Hood and his merry men have diverted the Bank's funds to a number of 'good causes' by manipulation...
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Funny story: Philip joins skag shooting party

Philip joins skag shooting party

Norfolk - And it's off with the intravenous drip and straight back to the family fold for Prince Philip where the traditional post-Boxing Day shooting party awaited him in Sandringham's Golden Triangle Wing. La Famiglia's customary pot shots at in...
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Funny story: Great Expectations For Great Expectations

Great Expectations For Great Expectations

The BBC announced today that it great expectations for its drama, Great Expectations, which will be aired for three consecutive nights during the boring arse period between Christmas and the new year. The new version stars Ray Winston, out of Scum...
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Funny story: The Adventure Of The Missing Christmas Goose Pt I; A Festive Shylock Humes Mystery

The Adventure Of The Missing Christmas Goose Pt I; A Festive Shylock Humes Mystery

It was upon the second morning after the first Christmas since my first marriage that I had called upon my friend Shylock Humes in order to wish him the compliments of the season. There had been a hard frost overnight, which had given the fresh snow of Boxing day the character of sugar icing. The vile alleys were full of frozen drunkards and perished prostitutes, and the urchin children begged...
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Funny story: Nine Out Of Ten Brits Are 'Sick To Effin Death Of Turkey'

Nine Out Of Ten Brits Are 'Sick To Effin Death Of Turkey'

It happens every year. Millions of Brits eagerly anticipate the Christmas festivities, and the traditional Christmas dinner of a turkey roast with all the trimmings, only to find themselves completely disillusioned with the whole concept of turkey wi...
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Funny story: A day without Agent Orange is like a day without sunshine

A day without Agent Orange is like a day without sunshine

DETROIT, MI - Soon you won't have to drink juice to get your Agent Orange because it will be in corn. And corn is in almost all the food you buy, most commonly as a syrup. Dr. Umbday Eadhay, family doctor in the rust belt, our source, is going to...
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Funny story: 2011 Was the Year That Was - And What A Was

2011 Was the Year That Was - And What A Was

2011 is about to become history and the most memorable event appears to be a tie between the end of Osama bin Laden and Kim Kardashian's wedding/marriage. While the right is crediting former President Bush for bin Laden's demise, they remain silent...
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Funny story: New Laws In Effect Starting January 1- READ CAREFULLY- Ignorance is Not a Defense

New Laws In Effect Starting January 1- READ CAREFULLY- Ignorance is Not a Defense

WASHINGTON- With the New Year rapidly approaching, it's time to make those changes for yourself and society. Since citizens are having issues when it comes to making sense, the government will be stepping in. The following behaviors/ items will become illegal as of January 1st, 2012. Please look over the new laws thoroughly since ignorance is not a defense. Diet Drinks and Not So Diet Meals...
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Funny story: Cheat Sheet - How To Identify A Crazy Guy Before It's Too Late

Cheat Sheet - How To Identify A Crazy Guy Before It's Too Late

I have a very dear friend who attracts a particular type of spices that should only be referred to as Bat Shit Crazy, BSCs. I will take on the challenge of this particular revolution, just please jump on the band wagon so I don't seem…. I think you get it. Once we are all secured in this vessel, we need to let the scientific community in on this new idea, if only for the purpose of identifying th...
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Funny story: Christmas Time - Who really likes it anyway?

Christmas Time - Who really likes it anyway?

People hate Christmas. It's a fact that has been disputed by experts with way too much time on their hands for a number of years now. People hate Christmas for a huge number of reasons be it the crass commerciality of the event, the fact no one every bought you a decent Lego set or you might just genuinely believe Jesus is a cunt. I believe though Britons "Hatred Of Christmas" stems from one place...
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Funny story: Turkey Arse Sales Soar In Cash-Strapped Britain

Turkey Arse Sales Soar In Cash-Strapped Britain

The British Butchers Co-operative (BBC) today announced that this year has seen a record breaking increase in the sale of turkey arses. The turkey arse fell out of favour when WWII rationing ended in the 1950s, when most meat vendors flogged them...
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Funny story: Newt Gingrich Says He Did Not Have Sex With That Woman Ann Coulter

Newt Gingrich Says He Did Not Have Sex With That Woman Ann Coulter

IOWA CITY, Iowa - Newt Gingrich's political campaign bus nicknamed the "Stud Bus" pulled into Iowa City, the town noted for being the place where Indian guide Sacajawea had that now infamous menage-a-trois with American explorers Lewis and Clark.
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Funny story: Record sales of ouzo save Greek economy!

Record sales of ouzo save Greek economy!

The Greek economy has been saved due to the global record consumption of their most famous product, ouzo, over the Christmas period. The German and French governments + other European states are relieved that the Euro crisis has now been resolved and...
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Funny story: Florence Nightingale to be employed at Fergie's lazarett!

Florence Nightingale to be employed at Fergie's lazarett!

The increasing list of ill, injured players at Man Utd goes only to prove that the medical care on offer at the club is not quite adequate for a top-level professional footie club. Without mentioning too many names (boring) it seems that the likes...
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Funny story: Prince Philip forcibly ejected from hospital

Prince Philip forcibly ejected from hospital

After one too many "and what do you do's" and accusations of oderlies having "not defended their homelands against Hitler", Prince Philip was politely requested by two 34-stone hospital security guards to leave Papworth Hospital in Cambridgeshire whe...
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Funny story: 'Mad Max Mel' Gives His Brave Heart

'Mad Max Mel' Gives His Brave Heart

Mel Givson's ex-wife has been awarded half his $850 million fortune in their final divorce settlement, according to Trudy Worthington of the 'Hollywood Now Reporter'. The actor is now officially a hard core cussing and very unhappy single man afte...
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Funny story: The Scottish Santa Claus

The Scottish Santa Claus

There are few Christmas traditions more familiar and charming than hanging up a stocking for Father Christmas, leaving him a mince pie and a carrot for his reindeer. But things are done a bit differently in Scotland. There it is customary to leave out a drop of whisky and a few cans of Stella. The Scottish Santa needs fuel to keep him going through the long, dark and blurry Scottish night. H...
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Funny story: Nike Air Jordan Sneakers; The Real Reason People Fight to Buy Them

Nike Air Jordan Sneakers; The Real Reason People Fight to Buy Them

The pushing and shoving, the brawls, the pepper spray. That's what some people wanting to snag themselves a pair of the latest Nike Air Jordans have had to endure. Is it worth it? Those in the know say YES. This is a product beyond compare.
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Funny story: Shocker! Cameron arrested for mooning at France

Shocker! Cameron arrested for mooning at France

Incredible news has reached us that Prime Minister David Cameron has taken his Christmas festivities a tad to far and has clearly shown he is not exempt from the long arm of the law. After a heavy political year for 'Dave', which saw unions throwi...
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