Funny story: Washing Powder Company drops Alan Hansen

Washing Powder Company drops Alan Hansen

More bad news for football pundit Alan Hansen after a lucrative Sponsorship deal with Washing Powder manufacturer Mulatto was controversially and publicly ended today. The axing is believed to be a result of his ill-advised comments on Match of the D...
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Funny story: Michelle Obama Gets An Apology From A U.S. Senator Who Said She Has A Caboose Like Kim Kardashian's

Michelle Obama Gets An Apology From A U.S. Senator Who Said She Has A Caboose Like Kim Kardashian's

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Wisconsin Senator Jim Sensenbrenner has issued an apology to the first lady Michelle Obama for his extremely insensitive, uncalled for, and very ignorant statement. The senator from the Cheese State was at Reagan Airport in Wash...
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Funny story: Ecstatic Peter Andre's new skincare range flying off shelves : Katie Price 'bloody fuming'

Ecstatic Peter Andre's new skincare range flying off shelves : Katie Price 'bloody fuming'

As reported some days ago, everyone's favourite aussie-greek, (do we actually know any others?..Ed.) Peter Andre, launched his new skincare range for men, 'Silli-cleanse by Andre'. Well our sources say that it is already this Christmas's number one s...
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Funny story: Paul Scholes: John Terry called me Gingernut

Paul Scholes: John Terry called me Gingernut

John Terry is in even more hot water as Paul Scholes has come forward to pour more scorn on the beleaguered footballer with the announcement that Terry called Scholes a Gingernut. "It was when United played Chelsea at Stamford Bridge," said Schole...
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Funny story: Merseyside: croissant thief on the rampage

Merseyside: croissant thief on the rampage

Police have finally arrested a man with a minor speech impediment after a series of robberies at bakers' shops. During the last few weeks, the man had robbed nearly all the bakeries in Liverpool, each time using the same disguise. According to the...
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Funny story: Bomb Squad keep abreast of the times

Bomb Squad keep abreast of the times

Officials in the U.K. have issued an alert to women after it was discovered that some breast implants manufactured in France and sold in the UK are likely to explode on Christmas day, the Daily Express newspaper reported today. The implants were made...
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Funny story: Mothman Substitutes For Santa Claus This Christmas Eve

Mothman Substitutes For Santa Claus This Christmas Eve

Point Pleasant, WV-- He's making a list and checking it twice, but it's probably not who you think it is. Mothman is helping out Santa this year, after Santa had a terrible accident. The jolly old elf had his balls ripped off during a freak accident...
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Funny story: US navy allow first public gay kiss!

US navy allow first public gay kiss!

The US Navy have allowed two of its' sailors, who just happened to be lesbians, to kiss in public. The straight men on board on seeing the two kiss disappeared into the toilets with a copy of Playboy. The gay male sailor fraternity also run off to th...
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Funny story: "Leap Centimetre" To Be Added To The Length Of The Metre In 2012

"Leap Centimetre" To Be Added To The Length Of The Metre In 2012

The International Bureau of Weights and Measures in Paris today announced that a "leap centimetre" would be added to the length of the metre at midnight on 28th February 2012, to coincide with the addition of an extra day to the year. 'People are...
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Funny story: The Infamous Computer Monitor Tossing Delivery Man Has Has Been Fired and Has Gone Into The 'Witless' Protection Program

The Infamous Computer Monitor Tossing Delivery Man Has Has Been Fired and Has Gone Into The 'Witless' Protection Program

LOS ANGELES - A spokesperson for the FlexHex Package Delivery Service Company has issued a statement that Fiorello "The Punk" Picklefark has been fired and told to turn in his Bermuda shorts. The former delivery service employee, who was video tap...
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Funny story: Prince William for X Factor

Prince William for X Factor

Prince William of Leicestershire has been previewing his sensational act for the next series of X Factor. 'He is a wonderful Hip Hop Dancer' said partner Kate of Leicestershire in an exclusive interview 'he has been practising for weeks and has ev...
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Funny story: Pink Floyd to play last concert on top of Everest

Pink Floyd to play last concert on top of Everest

Pink Floyd have announced to excited fans on their website that they are to play a farewell concert from of all places...the summit of mount Everest. Planned for summer 2012 they will be playing some of their most beloved and popular songs from a...
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Funny story: Implant Shock

Implant Shock

A firm specialising in Brain Implants has become bankrupt after it was discovered that some implanted Brains were leaking. Housewife Marjorie Dawes (39) with her two children beside her described how she felt when part of her brain began seeping t...
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Funny story: Organic Molecules Found on Pluto - International Astronomers Pissed

Organic Molecules Found on Pluto - International Astronomers Pissed

Following the removal of Pluto's planet status by the International Astronomy Union in 2006, the dead orbiting body has received little respect. That is, until now. Discovered by the Hubbell telescope this past week, Pluto was found to have eviden...
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Funny story: Brazil Surges, Hungary Down, Britain Wins

Brazil Surges, Hungary Down, Britain Wins

Not an international football summary, but just another day on the international business circuit. Brazil futures have taken a turn for the better, Hungary's debt situation forced a downgrade by Standard & Poor and British Airways wins bid for a...
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Funny story: Kim Kardashian Denies That She's The Reason Why Kobe Bryant's Wife Filed For Divorce

Kim Kardashian Denies That She's The Reason Why Kobe Bryant's Wife Filed For Divorce

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Since announcing that she was divorcing her philandering Los Angeles Lakers husband Vanessa Bryant has been keeping a very low profile. So much in fact that even FedEx deliverymen cannot seem to contact her to deliver Christmas p...
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Funny story: Stripy Jumpers to be banned

Stripy Jumpers to be banned

Stripy jumpers are to be banned from British television starting in spring next year, with a wider ban on stripy jumpers in general to follow a few months later. "It doesn't matter if the jumper has vertical or horizontal stripes," said Fashion Mi...
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Funny story: Dorking headmaster slams 'bullying' gossip website

Dorking headmaster slams 'bullying' gossip website

Surrey - Police are investigating a 'cruel and unusual website' accused of bullying by a Dorking headmaster disgusted with its 'homophobic, racist and sexist' rants. Dave Skag, head of Dorking High, said the Little Gossip website was full of hate...
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Funny story: Green Belt construction authorised

Green Belt construction authorised

Helmont Homes have been given the go ahead to build on several sites that were previously declared as being of historical significance, such as the Edwardian Folly on the outskirts of Dorking. "Green belt land is so much cheaper than all this bro...
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Funny story: Which Is Worse: Kid Or Parent? Helpful Tips On Combating The "Unruly Child Pandemic"

Which Is Worse: Kid Or Parent? Helpful Tips On Combating The "Unruly Child Pandemic"

It was just Saturday evening that I was with my very own mother. We were on the escalator traveling upstairs from the lower level of Fairway to the street. Half way upstairs, we heard shrill screams and the sound of slamming footsteps on the tile. Ok, think fast. Kidnappers? Terrorists? Nope. Just your average run of the mill irresponsible parenting. What did we see? At the top of the escalat...
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Funny story: Adopt an unemployed person scheme in pipeline

Adopt an unemployed person scheme in pipeline

A controversial new scheme announced by George Osborne today will give tax payers the opportunity to 'adopt' an unemployed person for as little as £5 a month. The scheme will provide bi-monthly updates on how the jobless adoptee is progressing in...
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Funny story: Ten Comparisons between Santa Claus & David Cameron

Ten Comparisons between Santa Claus & David Cameron

The Comparisons between Santa and David Cameron 1. When the poor ask Santa for something, the odds of receiving what you wanted are infinitesimal, with Cameron, it's impossible. 2. Santa seldom answers the poor's you email, Cameron never answers the poor's emails. 3. Santa seldom answers the poor's mail, Cameron never answers the poor's mail. 4. Santa gets all the stuff he's got from k...
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Funny story: Sponsorships Take Over Football

Sponsorships Take Over Football

After Newcastle renamed their stadium the Specsavers Stadium, there have been a rash of clubs wanting to follow in their footsteps to earn extra income. From Bolton's Odour-Eaters Stadium to Ipswich's Anusol Arena, the high street has finally come to...
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Funny story: A True Diary of Woe - Part Thirty-Five

A True Diary of Woe - Part Thirty-Five

A diary of one man's utter failure, depression, frustration, cock-ups, and impecuniousness, starting in August 1947 Chapter 65 - The Hospital Visitor? After my cardiac surgery, and two days of which I can remember little, I was moved to the Intensive care for a day, then back into the 'Morris' cardiac ward in the Nottingham City Hospital. As I awoke, and looked at the paraphernalia protrudi...
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Funny story: A True Diary of Woe - Part Thirty-Four

A True Diary of Woe - Part Thirty-Four

A diary of one man's utter failure, depression, frustration, cock-ups, and impecuniousness, starting in August 1947 Chapter 64 - One of my fortnightly trips to the public baths Each fortnight, Dad and I would venture out to the Public baths on Portland Street, in the Meadows area of Nottingham. It was a very stressful exercise for Dad, because it involved him parting with 3d (1½p), and th...
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Funny story: Charlie Sheen Is Being Touted To Be The Host of The New Reality Show "Home Celebrity Rehab"

Charlie Sheen Is Being Touted To Be The Host of The New Reality Show "Home Celebrity Rehab"

SHERMAN OAKS - Charlie Sheen says that he has really enjoyed staying out of the limelight lately and added that he has just passed the time sitting back and watching all of the Pepper Spray stuff, the Penn State mess, the fall of Herman Cain, and the...
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Funny story: Baby Jesus Thief Unrepentant

Baby Jesus Thief Unrepentant

A Pennsylvania woman police have charged with heisting an 80-pound plaster-of-Paris Baby Jesus statuette reportedly has no remorse for her alleged actions. The hefty figurine was filched from its cradle in a nativity display in a strip mall in Virgi...
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Funny story: Quotes from President Obama's Political Speeches Reported

Quotes from President Obama's Political Speeches Reported

Washington DC: President Obama during a Democratic campaign speech given in Osawatomie, Kansas echoed the words of President Theodore Roosevelt (1901-1909). Overlooked by the media were other occasions where the Chief Executive utilized themes originally expressed by William Shakespeare. Friends, Republicans, countrymen, lend me your tax money. To drill or not to drill that is the question.
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