Funny story: Striking BBC hacks warned about missing news story-of-the-decade 'like the Queen dropping dead'

Striking BBC hacks warned about missing news story-of-the-decade 'like the Queen dropping dead'

London - (Rioters): "Fat chance, mate," is how the Beeb's NUJ father-of-chapel summed up the odds this afternoon. The 48 hour walk out will see a widespread Guy Fawkes weekend news blackout. Hacks are hacked off about austerity measures messin...
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Funny story: Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Are Forever

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Are Forever

There's nothing fake or ephemeral about fey children of the night star-crossed vampyre couple Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart, says Celebrity Matchmaker Titti Banger, writes Carrie N Crowe, Recycled Neo-Gothic Farrago Correspondent. Millionai...
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Funny story: Students threaten to join national "strike"

Students threaten to join national "strike"

In protest at the UK government's recent cuts, student unions throughout the country are preparing themselves for a nationally organised strike. Lecturers are dreading having to talk to reduced audiences, and student tutors are weeping over their...
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Funny story: Meghan McCain Chastises Bristol Palin For Not Voting

Meghan McCain Chastises Bristol Palin For Not Voting

BURBANK - John McCain's daughter Meghan McCain appeared on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and severely criticized Sarah Palin's daughter, Bristol, for not voting in the political election on Tuesday. McCain, who has gotten into verbal altercations...
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Funny story: Michelle Reportedly Struggles Picking Gifts for India PM; Settles on Wal Mart Gift Card & Toilet Paper!

Michelle Reportedly Struggles Picking Gifts for India PM; Settles on Wal Mart Gift Card & Toilet Paper!

Michelle Obama, socially challenged when it comes to gifting visiting or host leaders of the free world, found herself perplexed again when it came time to pick some gifts for her latest host, the PM of India. With her husband in tow, including th...
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Funny story: Michelle Obama Admits Blow Up Doll Of Obama Better Than Obama!

Michelle Obama Admits Blow Up Doll Of Obama Better Than Obama!

Poor President Obama. First the Republicans kick most of his fellow Democrats out of office and replace them. Now Michelle has bought an Obama blow-up doll from China to keep her company while he is on the road. "She won't quit talking about the (...
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Funny story: Kristen Stewart Tells Taylor Lautner Her Sexual Fantasies

Kristen Stewart Tells Taylor Lautner Her Sexual Fantasies

Robert Pattinson apparently called up Kristen this past weekend and they began talking about their future together and all the great things they would enjoy together as man and wife. However, Taylor Launtner is visiting Pattinson as they are discu...
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Funny story: Grand Finale (chapter 30): "Apocalypso Now " (Pygmie style)

Grand Finale (chapter 30): "Apocalypso Now " (Pygmie style)

Spiderwebs of misty vapour climbed like ivy on the side of the village church, gently. The air was as thick as pea soup after the monsoon rains had subsided allowing the torturous sun to create magic circles of dew dancing upon the misty webs. The chameloen time machine had served it's purpose, the crew their duty. Now as the splintered, battered raft drifted helplessly floating gently upon the...
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Funny story: Local Man Dumbstruck as Quran Falls From Sky!

Local Man Dumbstruck as Quran Falls From Sky!

Local man Percival Sullivan was struck dumb today whilst walking his dog when he was issued a glancing blow from a falling Quran! 'Sully', who was dazed and more than slightly confused, but otherwise not seriously injured, took the incident as a w...
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Funny story: A Masterchev Guide to: Budget Cuts

A Masterchev Guide to: Budget Cuts

George Osbourne's released his areas where he's going to be saving the pennies. Here's our guide of where he SHOULD have taxed and why. * The Pork Pie industry has been supplying John Prescott and co with comfort for many years. With Johnny P. out of office, he can buy them like the rest of us from Morrisons for a fiver. * Big City Bankers should face a huuuuuge tax on their expensive cars a...
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Funny story: Winning Councilman Blows Off Election Day To Play With Doggie

Winning Councilman Blows Off Election Day To Play With Doggie

"I have no chance of actually winning," said Sherri Myers, who actually won. For most elected officials, the climax of weeks and months of aggressive campaigning comes on election day, when they find out whether, as an elected official, they will...
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Funny story: Republicans Begin Search for New War

Republicans Begin Search for New War

Buoyed by the Republican Party's victories in the mid-term elections, likely House Speaker John ("Weepy") Boehner (R-Ohio) pledged to find a new war for America: "Let's face it," said Boehner, "The American people became totally bored by the wars in...
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Funny story: Pat Robertson: God's Will Has Been Done

Pat Robertson: God's Will Has Been Done

Special to Spoof - Excited by Republican/Tea Party wins in Tuesday's midterm elections, televangelist Pat Robertson has decided to expand 700 Club membership by offering free tickets on the Rapture Express. The Rapture Express is similar in design to...
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Funny story: 10 Year Old Girl Gives Birth tells Tyra Banks I Love Sex

10 Year Old Girl Gives Birth tells Tyra Banks I Love Sex

The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain. Last week a 10 year old girl gave birth to her baby in Spain. This means that she had sex at 9 if not sooner. The 10 year old girl is a Romanian Gypsy girl, a Roma. The custom of the Roma is to allow their...
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Funny story: Palin Gets Facial Warts - Popularity Poll Drops 90%.

Palin Gets Facial Warts - Popularity Poll Drops 90%.

In a horrifying situation that would destroy the morale of many political pundits, Republican spokeswoman Sarah Palin has developed hideous warts on her face. Since their appearance Ms. Palin's polls have dropped drastically. Statisticians estima...
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Funny story: Napoleon's Castle: What the new policy means for you.

Napoleon's Castle: What the new policy means for you.

The latest government plan to form a close alliance with France will have severe implications for Britain, the Chancellor of Television has announced. Mr. Jones told us how the hit French TV show Napoleon's Castle was the only reason Cameron had r...
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Funny story: Lil' Wayne Fights to Restore Happy Meals in San Francisco

Lil' Wayne Fights to Restore Happy Meals in San Francisco

Shocked at the news over the Happy Meal ban in San Francisco, a regular stomping ground for the recently incarcerated recording artist, Lil' Wayne has gone "full guns", if you'll pardon the pun, to lobby against the ban. Quickly getting his contra...
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Funny story: Chapter 29: Sacrifice

Chapter 29: Sacrifice

Jean Le Fete entered through the TARDIS doors, noticing how the old team of renegade Spoofers were gathered determinedly around the console. He noticed how Morse stood near the centre, adjusting his pirate hat, whilst Charpa fiddled with her fishnet stockings out of distraction. His eyes caught how Skoob adjusted his Pork Pie hat, whereas Jaggedone was knelt with Birbee in a moment of silent praye...
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Funny story: A Portrait of the UK Government?

A Portrait of the UK Government?

David Cameron, yesterday revealing that he is to use £35k a year of taxpayers money to hire 'vanity photographer' Andrew Parsons, today says that this will not be enough. Having had extensive talks with Cherie Blair he is now prepared for the coun...
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Funny story: WHAT ABOUT US? American Indians On War Path As Obama Spends $200M a Day in Mumbai!

WHAT ABOUT US? American Indians On War Path As Obama Spends $200M a Day in Mumbai!

The American Indian Nation was up in arms today as US Chief Barry Obama prepared for his Hindu Indian Campaign said to be costing the taxpayer $200m per day and tying up most of the armed forces as they circle the wagons in Mumbai! The Bureau o...
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Funny story: Judges Gone ... Will Same-Sex Marriage Be Next in Iowa?

Judges Gone ... Will Same-Sex Marriage Be Next in Iowa?

Des Moines, Iowa -- In a history-making decision, nearly fifty-five percent of Iowa voters who went to the polls on November 2 voted to remove three Supreme Court justices who ruled with the majority to legalize same-sex marriage in Iowa. The camp...
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Funny story: Stock Market Could Crash At Any Time: Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke

Stock Market Could Crash At Any Time: Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke

Fed Chairman Ben Shalom Bernanke told reporters right up front this morning that we could easily have a stock market crash at any time. "We have just printed enough money to lower the dollar's worth to about 80% of what it was. That means that all...
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Funny story: Yoda to Release New Rap Album

Yoda to Release New Rap Album

Long thought to be the product of a science fiction writer's imagination, the real life Yoda, a scant man from Leeds, U.K. with pointy ears, bad teeth and a permanent case of yellowish-green Jaundice, will be releasing a new hard core Rap album this...
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Funny story: Ealing borough to import igloos

Ealing borough to import igloos

MP for Ealing Central, Angie Bray, has confirmed reports the borough are to import Igloos from Greenland in a bid to increase affordable housing in the area. Ealing is currently in the midst of a housing crisis, likely to be impacted further by th...
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Funny story: Election Provides Fresh Excuses For Reps and Dems To Accomplish Nothing

Election Provides Fresh Excuses For Reps and Dems To Accomplish Nothing

Washington, D.C.--Democratic and Republican politicians continue their rejoicing today at the results of the November 2 election. The newly divided congress has elected members of both parties breathing easier at the prospect of two full years of get...
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Funny story: Birthers Widen Net: Challenge Legality of Eight Presidencies

Birthers Widen Net: Challenge Legality of Eight Presidencies

Undeterred by setbacks in its challenge to the legality of President Barack Obama's presidency, the Birther Movement has widened its scope by challenging the legality of eight other U.S. presidencies. The Birther movement, so-called because it insist...
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Funny story: Nude Photos Shock!

Nude Photos Shock!

Newsrooms throughout the world have been sent mysterious photographs of naked ladies cavorting on a lonely beach. No one knows who they are and why they were sent. 'If it's a joke,' said the editor of 'The Times', 'it is in very poor taste.' Ho...
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Funny story: Mars Bars Immigration

Mars Bars Immigration

Plans to colonise Mars by sending volunteers with one way tickets are facing a major setback. Martians have issued a five star injunction stopping immigration to the Planet. 'First you call Mars a Red planet of Wars, then you want to invade withou...
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Funny story: Sheen Surprises Today

Sheen Surprises Today

"I'm going into the priesthood" was a statement issued by Charles (as he said he now likes to be called) Sheen on the Today Show. The shocked cast had no response for the over-paid actor. "I have given it much thought, I have meditated, went into...
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Funny story: GM IPO Just Another Obama Shell Game to Cost Taxpayers!

GM IPO Just Another Obama Shell Game to Cost Taxpayers!

United Auto Union Workers celebrating the latest Ponzi scheme from deep in Michigan at their Black Lake Golf Course and Planning Center, announced that the upcoming GM IPO would help fund their Pensions for at least 6 more months! With Obama owni...
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Funny story: Survivor's Jeff Probst Admires this Season's Bikinis

Survivor's Jeff Probst Admires this Season's Bikinis

Jeff Probst, hit television series host for the Survivor franchise has the unenviable task of distancing himself from contestants, especially when some of them look pretty good in a bikini. "Sometimes the distance isn't all that great", says assis...
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Funny story: Airbus A380 Engines Certified Safe by FAAPT

Airbus A380 Engines Certified Safe by FAAPT

Following multiple incidents where engines on the massive Airbus A380 have experienced performance or reliability problems in flight, including a recent Qantas transcontinental flight, Airbus released a report today where the engines were certified a...
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Funny story: Jamie & Nigella's Recipes for M.P.'s

Jamie & Nigella's Recipes for M.P.'s

Jamie Oliver and Nigella Lawson have been commissioned by Parliament to provide recipes to the Parliamentary Canteen. You can print these recipes yourself and prepare the meals so you can feel just like a Member of Parlament. Jamie's Turd in the Hole. Take a pickled turd from the cabinet and fry with a piece of bread with a hole in which to place the turd. After 5 minutes add a sprin...
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Funny story: Hollywood running out of police cars

Hollywood running out of police cars

The American film industry is facing something of crisis. So many recent films have required scenes in which the American police showcase their poor driving skills by crashing into just about anything stationary or moving that they are running out of...
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Funny story: Brown tries to explain folly

Brown tries to explain folly

Glasgow, Scotland Former British Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, on a private holiday to the Glaswegian environs, has admitted in a interview that he lived in a parallel universe while he was the UK's leader. He explained that the society he existed...
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Funny story: Suicide bomber fears as Yemeni photocopier found up Queen's arse

Suicide bomber fears as Yemeni photocopier found up Queen's arse

London - (Gunpowder Plot): Friday's annual Palace Bonfire Night bash has been cancelled amid fears the Queen may auto-immolate this weekend. A routine medical scan found one of the missing Yemeni photocopiers buried up Her Majesty's arse, its inkj...
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Funny story: Born Again Christians get 'Clapland' approval

Born Again Christians get 'Clapland' approval

Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger's office has confirmed Born Again Christians have been given permission to construct a theme park on the outskirts of California. The theme park, 'Clapland' has been criticised in some quarters for making money from...
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Funny story: David Cameron to outsource reality

David Cameron to outsource reality

In further attempts at cost saving measures, the conservative government have decided to change the nature of reality itself, as it has been decided that the presently existing paradigm is no longer financially viable. Talks are being held in an...
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Funny story: Shock: Man Has Family Tree Removed

Shock: Man Has Family Tree Removed

A Warwickshire man has been left with no history, after council workers cut down and removed his family tree. The tree, an oak, was positioned in the front garden of his house in a small village, and had stood there since his ancestors moved to th...
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Funny story: Yemeni photocopier found inside downed Quantas jumbo engine

Yemeni photocopier found inside downed Quantas jumbo engine

Singapore - (Pie-in-the-Sky News): The London to Sydney Airbus A380 was first thought to have been pranged by the Stuxnet virus. It's number two engine exploded shortly after takeoff from Changi Airport filling Business Class with the unmistakable...
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Funny story: 'Blow-up Barry' doll is lifelike say delighted sex shop fans

'Blow-up Barry' doll is lifelike say delighted sex shop fans

Illinois - (Ass Mess): A lifesize inflatable sex doll of President Barack Obama comes with a tantalising range of accessories after the fuct (sic) sex shop customers have said. 'Blow-up Barry' - as it has been dubbed - is pretty much lifelike down...
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Funny story: BBC apologises to Geldof for Band Aid slur

BBC apologises to Geldof for Band Aid slur

In the heady days of the mid 1980s, Band Aid, and the subsequent Live Aid concerts, were just what was needed to end third world famine and poverty. Bob Geldof was elevated from mediocre pop singer to saint status overnight. A pop record sold mill...
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Funny story: Kate Middleton: Inside The Mind Of A Future Queen.

Kate Middleton: Inside The Mind Of A Future Queen.

It seems this lovely young lady, who has captured all our hearts - not just Prince William's - is destined to be our Queen one day. We know what she looks like and the official life story. But what is she like underneath the royal glamour? What makes her tick? We sent society editor Melissa Blit-Head to find out. Here is her exclusive report... The Hon Jemima Boden-Boden has known Kate...
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Funny story: Harry Redknapp: Pompey Fans' Fury At "Sleight."

Harry Redknapp: Pompey Fans' Fury At "Sleight."

Portsmouth FC fans are furious at an alleged sleight to their club by former manager Harry Redknapp. Mr Redknapp had a colourful couple of spells at the south cost club, leading them into the Premier League and eventually winning the FA Cup with t...
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Funny story: Saturdays Mystery: Who Has "Issues?"

Saturdays Mystery: Who Has "Issues?"

You wouldn't think it to look at them, but when gorgeous girl group The Saturdays appear in public, it has taken one of them an enormous amount of brave Work to get there. One of the Missing You girls has to have a dedicated team of psychiatrists...
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Funny story: 'My Art is Dogshit' boasts Damien Hirst

'My Art is Dogshit' boasts Damien Hirst

Notorious multi-millionaire artist Damien Hirst is making the streets and parks of London a little more colourful by painting miniature pictures on pieces of dog excrement. "My whole career has consisted of polishing turds." says Brit Art's 'Bad L...
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Funny story: Controversy over implant to help blind people see

Controversy over implant to help blind people see

The electronic implant which has helped blind people to see is seen by most people as a marvellous leap forward, or at least thought to be a marvellous leap forward by some who haven't had it yet, but a group of religious fanatics is threatening to d...
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Funny story: Jon Runyan, Heath Shuler: Big Dumb Jock Now Congressman Big Dumb Jock

Jon Runyan, Heath Shuler: Big Dumb Jock Now Congressman Big Dumb Jock

Keyport, NJ resident Miel Rosania was just finishing her bacon and eggs at a local diner when a huge, Sasquatch-looking monster approached her. Armed with Mace, Rosania waited for the right moment to douse the hideous beast when he said, "Hi, I'm...
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Funny story: Full extent of David Cameron's photo addiction exposed

Full extent of David Cameron's photo addiction exposed

A top Professor from the World Health Organisation has tonight revealed that he believes David Cameron could be suffering from a newly identified health disorder,which involves a total addiction to being photographed at all times. The disorder i...
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